should i let my daughter change her name,

[sanchpanch]

hello, my daughter age 7 and hates her name, as she feels really differnt from everone else, her name is Sanchia, other children at her school have unusual names but she doesnt see them as different she accepts them, This has been an on going thing, this september she starts a new school and doesnt know anyone there so she feels this would be a good oppurtunity to change it, just wondered if anyone else has experience of this, and any solution, be glad to hear any ideas, thanks

[ElliesMad]

HI,
In the late 13th century there was a Sanchia of Provence who married Richard, Duke of Cornwall, brother of Henry III. She was the sister of Eleanor of Provence, who in turn was married to Henry III. She was reported to be a beauty. Don't know if this will help but Eleanor is quite like Ellie, if not.I'm not biased either).
My daughter has a beautiful name but no one can say it or spell it and people are shortening it already, which I don't like.

[janeybops]

I had a year 3 class a few years ago. On class swap day Katie came up to me and asked that I label everything with her real name of Kathryn for year 3. so I did. By the end of the year most people were calling her Kathryn, apart from her parents. She used Kathryn till she left the school at 11 and as far as I know is still using it.

[bobbybob]

Between around 7 and 11 I wanted to be called another name. My parents wouldn't entertain the idea and I obviously forgot about it until now.

[colditzmum]

I work with a girl called Ethel, she is only 20, and I only found out that was her real name because I fetched her payslip for her one day. I had always known her as Emma, and still call her Emma. I actually wish she would let us call her Ethel, we have 2 other Emmas and I think Ethel is a lovely name.

[Listmaker]

My 7 year old frequently asks to change her name from Maddie (short for Madeleine) to Roxanne!!!! Needless to say I say no! As others have said I think 7 is a bit young to make such a change! As someone who did grow up as a Sue I wish now I had something much more unusual but was happy with it at school (I think - was a long time ago!!). She will probably like it when she's older.

[pabla]

I have always been called by my middle name (this used to be very common where I grew up for some reason - think when children were called after someone in the family, the middle name was commonly used to avoid confusion.) Anyway, I would not recommmend this as it causes endless problems. Maybe it was ok in the past when we didn't have so many official forms of id, bank accounts, credit cards, etc. A friend who suffered the same fate recently adopted a little boy from abroad. He had to make witnessed sworn statements to say that he was who he was!

BTW, my dd is 7.5 and has a name that is unusual in this country and people always ask how to pronounce it. She seems happy with it and I would be really sad if she wanted to change it. I once worked with someone whose daughter changed her (perfectly nice) name when she was in her teens. I think she was going through a bit of a rebellious stage. I think he and his wife were quite hurt by her decision.

[QueenEagle]

When I divorced I changed back to my maiden name and wanted my 3 kids to change too so it was all done by deed poll when they were about 6, 4 and 2. The 2 younger ones were too young to realise any change but my daughter aged 6 kept writing her surname as a ? at school which meant she was obviously confused by it even though I had discussed it with her and she wanted to change. Then I remarried 2.5 years ago and after discussions with my kids we decided to make our surname double barrelled with my new husband's. It's quite a unique name and we all love it.

I would be wary of allowing your daughter to change her name to something completely different and maybe encourage her to just abbreviate it. This could after all only be a passing fad. Tell her its a name you chose especially for her and say how much you love it. Maybe she is feeling a bit insecure and just needs a bit of reassurance? Failing that, use it as a term of endearment perhaps? That way you are meeting her halfway.

[cori]

I wouldnt let her change her name is either.
I have an unusual name too. I hated it when I was a child. I wanted a name that I could find printed on pencils and stationery etc. However by the time I was a teen I had come to love it.
Sanchia is quite an adult sounding name, she will probably grow into it.

[chipmonkey]

Aloha, scarlett?

[vict17]

I too have an unusual name and used to get a few jokes about it at school and wished i could change it. However, now I like it and it makes me smile when people say 'oh what a lovely name' now although I still get the odd 'joke' from adults!!!

[FrenchGirl]

Aloha, Leah?????

[QueenEagle]

I gave 3 of my kids names which were fairly uncommon at the time. Now though their names seem to be really common and its not unusual to find at least a couple of the same name in their classes at school. My 2nd youngest's name is now just starting to get more popular, probably thanks to a famous footballer with the same surname! My daughter's name seems to be pretty unique as it's never on cards or stationery or anything. We gave up with baby no.5 and called him James!

[zebra]

I vote Yes, let her, I would, because I CHANGED MY NAME WHEN I WAS 7.

I asked my mother "Why can't I be called what I want to be called?" She was flummoxed because she had been known as "Betty Jean" much of her life and she hated it. Fought hard to be called "Elizabeth" instead. She told me ok, but I had to decide & make my mind up by the time I was 12. So, I chose a name of a TV character I liked & I have stuck with it ever since (changed the spelling slightly when I was 12). My passport, bank accounts, etc., are all in my chosen name, only time it's been an issue was when I got married I needed an "AKA" amendment on the license (this is in USA).

I know a Greek lady who was Panioyota when she arrived in the USA in 1948... she got teased for it ("pan"!), changed to "Pat", now, approaching retirement, she is seriously considering changing back. Why shouldn't she be called what she wants, too?

Aloha's real name is somewhere on MN, if you hunt for it.

[ionesmum]

Hi, SP. I wanted to change my name when I was little, it's not that uncommon now (and v. traditional too) but when I was growing up everyone was called Joanne or Tracey (nice names too) and my name stuck out a mile. It became a good way for bullies to tease me a sthey said it was 'posh' and 'stuck-up' (not good in East London) so when I moved to secondary school I shortened it and changed the spelling to something a bit less trad.

Now I wish I hadn't, as I prefer my 'proper' name and would rather use it, but everyone knows me by my shorter name. Anyway, are you really sure there's no deeper reason for your dd wanting to change her name? Could it be that someone has made a comment, or that she feels she needs to fit in with a particular image and a certain name will help?

[edam]

I changed my name when I was 7, sort of. Everyone called me Katie, but I discovered that my real name was something else and Katie was just a nickname. Seeing everything in black and white, as children do, I got it into my head they'd all been deliberately deceiving me (!) and insisted on everyone using my real, full name. Moved house and school so made the change easy. Never regretted it, even though it was a big identity change.
I know your daughter's situation is different, but saying 'yes'isn't necessarily a bad thing to do.

[SleepyJess]

Aloha. could it be Bianca??? Are you married to Ricccaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!

[PrettyCandles]

Funny, Edam, I was in the same situation in that I discovered that the name I was called wasn't my real name, but my reaction was entirely the opposite: that the 'real' name was false and a deception, and using it would be like trying to make me be someone else. Completely the opposite to you. You had a much healthier attitude IMO!

[sanchpanch]

thankyou for all taking time to reply i really appriciate it,

[aloha]

No SJ, btu someone else got it right....and yes, you can find it with a search!

[posyhairdresser]

What is her middle name - the grandparents names are usually fashionable again by now! My grandmothers were Lily & Ruby - both in the top 50 names again!

[HappyMumof2]

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[AussieSim]

I recently heard of a little boy 6 years old who put a case to his parents to change his name and won. His name was Jesse and he decided that he didn't like it as it was a girls' name, short for Jessica - very popular at the mo. The parents gave him plenty of examples of famous men called Jesse, but he was adamant and so they agreed to change it to his middle name - which I can't remember except to think that it was very unoffensive popular name at the moment. The parents thinking was that the child had really thought it through quite maturely and that besides doing the 'because I said so and I'm your father' routine they didn't have a worthy reason why not.

[HappyMumof2]

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