5 year old boy playing with girls toys

[earlynite]

Was just wondering if anyone else has had a similar "problem". My 5 year old son's favorite colour is pink and he is very interested in girls toys. It does not bother me but I am worried that if he mentions it to the boys at school they will make fun of him??

[AbsolutelyBeginning]

The pink for girls/blue for boys thing wasn't always so.

forgottenhistoryblog.com/pink-wasnt-always-considered-a-feminine-color-and-blue-wasnt-always-masculine/

Another paper, the Ladies Home Journal in 1918 wrote, “There has been a great diversity of opinion on the subject, but the generally accepted rule is pink for the boy and blue for the girl. The reason is that pink being a more decided and stronger color is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.” It’s also said that since pink is closer to red, it was more appropriate for boys because red is a “fierce” color, whereas blue was associated with girls since the Virgin Mary is customarily dressed in blue.

[dtl]

Hi
I was trawling through the site looking for this kind of thread...my son loves pink, fairies, dressing as a girl, wearing my shoes, pretending he has long hair by wearing a scarf over his head etc. (He does also love trains and kind of flits between the two). Recently though , if someone knocks at the door, he willl pull off his scarf, or hide if he is wearing his sister's dress (!)...i was wondering if other people's sons 'grew out of' this phase? I don't know how to handle this as he gets older...what did other mums say to their sons?

[qumquat]

It makes me really sad that you think this is a problem. Do you worry about adult men wearing pink shirts and caring for their babies?

[ProPerformer]

Well yesterday I bought DS (3.11) a Disney princess Cinderella pop up book from the church second hand bookstall! Out of all the books (including loads of 'boys' ones) he chose that and a Disney princess annual and I said he could have either without hesitation. (didn't have the change for both.) The lady on the bookstall was commenting on how her daughter was worried because her young son wanted a cookery set for Christmas, which she had said she'd get, and that me buying the girls book for DS had convinced her even more she was doing the right thing.

DS also has Disney princess stuff, loads of pink toys and a dressing up box full of, (amongst other things), various bits and bobs from Claire's accessories 'surprise bags' that I didn't want.

[cory]

The zombie posters may come from some other forum where this is The Rule.

The support forum for dd's condition I used to frequent was so strict that if you posted that your child had just been rushed into hospital with X, the first response would most likely be to inform you that there was a similar thread in 2002 and you should have posted in that.

One of the reasons I gradually withdrew from the forum, though they were otherwise very supportive: life seemed too short to trawl through the burial ground of old threads every time I wanted to say something.

[TheNebulousBoojum]

Zombie thread again, what is it with posters who won't start a new thread of their own?
Why not message the OP, if she's still around? Because her little boy is now at least 9 1/2 now.

[adoptmama]

DD1 was very colour-gender fascist :) She took a long time to accept girls can like blue and boys can like pink despite all I used to say on the topic to her (and despite being given trains, cars etc she wanted hideous Barbie). She was less clear to whom the colour green belonged! DD2 constantly opts for 'boys toys' like monster trucks and trains. Each to their own. As the OP says, she has no problem with this.

Some children will inevitably make fun of other children over issues like this. I'd give your DS a few stock answers like: daddies look after babies too, I'm allowed to like any colour I want to, aren't you? and so on.

[squeezedatbothends]

My ds loved Barbie, insisted on dressing in princess outfits, said he wanted to be a lady when he grew up and wanted a pink bedroom. I used to get upset that other mums asked me if I thought he was gay (he was 3 at the time so while I didn't mind if he turned out to be gay, I didn't think it was appropriate). By the time he was 5 he had learned to pretend at school - he lied in show and tell about his birthday presents. He's now 14 and gets very embarrassed when we recount these stories. He's a typical Xbox fanatic now. He either grew out of it or was socially conditioned out of it - I suspect the latter. I'm glad I had a relaxed attitude to it now - it was all part of his lovely quirky personality. He's also a talented artist - I wonder if he was just drawn to beautiful things.

[vladimirimp]

@squinny101 I wonder if your DD likes playing with boys toys whether she thinks her pink room full of pink things is as lovely as you do? I don't mean to be confrontational, but I think it's an interesting subject because we're the other way around with our DD. Her room is blue, we have avoided pink as much as possible and her toys are a broad range of colours and types - rocking horse, dolls house, tractor, car, blocks etc. She seems to really like her friend's pram and baby doll though, so we've bought her one for Christmas. We wonder whether one day she's like her room to be pink, at which point it'll be an interesting test for us!

[mylovelymonster]

Hate gender-distinction of toys and interests for young children. Let them explore what they want fgs.

[OverMyDeadBody]

When DS's favourite colour is purple and his best friend's (also a boy) is pink. I don't think any of the other boys in their class care tbh, and they're not the only ones either. He also likes nail polish on his toe nails.

[ConnorTraceptive]

If ds had his way he would be wearing some lovely pink sandals. Fortunately there were none in his size

He does like to wear a hoola skirt and my beads though

[OverMyDeadBody]

I see the op hasn't reappeared on this thread!

FFS if it doesn't bother you then don't define it as a 'problem'. It isn't one.

[worriermum]

I haven't read to the end of this thread so apologies if this has been said. My 4.5 ds loves pink and every time he chooses it I feel a glow of relief that my child is confident enough to choose what he likes, not what his peer group dictates. My hope is that this will translate into a secure teenager and adult who goes for what makes him happy in life. He also loves babies btw, and is mildly interested in dolls. Again, my hope is that this is a sign I'm raising a nurturing boy, and I feel proud at the thought.

Also, pink IS a nicer, brighter colour for a child (and me) than blue. That's probably why the girls=pink convention started. Your son just has good aesthetic sense
HTH

[BouncingTurtle]

My dss had a doll in a pushair when he was about 3-4, he also had a hoover... in fact I think he had 3!! He also had a toy kitchen as well and a teaset, which I supposed are girly?
I just thing gender demarkartion of toys for kids is a bit silly and unnecessary.
I'm considering buying a big dolls' house for my ds when he is a bit older!

[squinny101]

if it makes you feel any better. my dd will only play with boys toys. she has a lovely pink room with lots of lovely pink stuff in. she plays with her brothers dinosaurs, garage and tool sets. she also tries to wear his clothes and when you ask if she is a girl or a boy, she says she is a boy but in an american accent!

she only plays with boys at nursery and says girls are silly apart from one girl who has an older brother who she likes.

[Meandmyjoe]

It's normal for little boys to want 'girl's' toys at this age. They love pink because it's a novelty and not somethings they have had a lot of. Think about it, from the moment we find out they are boys we immediately dress them in blue and dark colours. We give them 'boy's' toys and expect them to know what gender they are and stick to it! It's a load of crap. A little boy does not know (nor should he) that some toys are meant for girls and others for boys. At this age they are all just interesting objects to them and have no gender attached to them. Don't worry, it's completely normal and I bet most of the boys in his class all want a pink pram to push around with a doll in it.

If you think about it, it's quite flattering when they want to care for a doll or do domestic chores as it means they are immitating you which is lovely.

I wonder if people would find it as 'odd' if a girl was playing with pretend tool sets and cars. I bet probably not. I wouldn;t worry that kids will pick on him. He'll be in to boys stuff soon enough and then you'll miss him wanting to be like you!

[ja9]

(or alternatively when he just grows out of the pink coat - whichever happens sooner!)

[ja9]

my ds is almost 4. when all the kids at his nursery go outside to play they just take one of the communal coats. apparently my ds has had a favourite one for quite a long time - a bright pink duffle coat. he was wearing it when i went to collect him last week. it made me laugh to think that he has this favourite, seems so odd as he has never expressed any interest or opinions on the clothes i choose for him at home. it makes me laugh... but i'll not be sad if he grows out of this wee phase!

[overthehill]

Our friends' middle ds was really into pink when he was about 4 and desperate to have a skirt of his own, so they bought him a kilt!

[Divastrop]

my ds2 also loves flowers,he is the same age

dd1 had barbies from age 3-6 but she is now 9 and they have all been given 'makeovers',mainly turned into goths

[hayley2u]

my ds plays with an awful lot of girls as welas the boys, but at their age (5) teres only us parents to tell them if its right to play with them or not, children learn through play and will copy domestic chores. my ds when he was 2/3 he was fascinated in the cups n saurses n making pretend tea etc so i bought him some platic ones and he loved it and would also askus for baby, and now hes into power rangers.
as i worked in nursery we wuld have days to bathe dolls make beads role play toencourage their emotional developent, plus now there is so much equal ops children are able to explore more whilst younger

[joash]

FGS - why is it a problem for a 5 year old boy to play with so-called 'girls' toys or to like pink?
what the hell are 'boys' toys and 'girls' toys - they are all just toys, it's people with restrictive attitudes who label them.

[LadyMuck]

If she is just 2.6 then I wouldn't rule out Barbie just yet!