So, CAMHS won't help us. What can we DO about an 8yo who wants to die?

[TheCountessofFitzdotterel]

Yesterday ds1 had an assessment with CAMHS and they said they couldn't offer us any help, because what we were already doing as parents was fine.

Today a lucky young person on their driving test got to demonstrate their emergency stop for real when ds pulled away from dh and stepped out in front of a car (our school is round the corner from the driving test centre).

I'm at my wit's end. All I came away with was a reading list of books about helping children with low self-esteem. Which of course I have ordered and will read, but I kind of hoped someone with actual experience and knowledge would be able to help, y'know?

I have hunted high and low for private counselling which we would happily pay for but it's hard to find anyone who will work with children this young (the ones that say they do children mostly seem to start at 10).

He's a lovely kid, has friends, hobbies, empathy, is very bright, but massively oversensitive and emotionally much younger than his actual age.

I can't believe that actual repeated attempts to self-harm, plus impossible behaviour at school (it was them who referred him to CAMHS) - oh, plus episodes where he thinks I am someone else/a monster in disguise and am trying to hurt him - are not considered enough to actually help us. What do we do? Other than what we are doing now, trying to parent him well and keep him safe?

[TheCountessofFitzdotterel]

Thank you all x

Maryz, I'm so sorry about your ds's best friend. How awful for him.

Goldmandra, he isn't distressed about wanting to die because he thinks he deserves to be dead. He talks about it with relish. I think if he stopped wanting to for long enough, it might upset him. But even when he appears to be having fun at the moment it's there in the background.

Re school holidays, yes, there is definitely a pattern. He's worse at the end of the school week and the end of term. Though tbh it's been bad every day since the CAMHS appointment nearly a fortnight ago. Still, 12.30 now and school haven't rung yet, so that's something.

His new one now is thinking me and dh are ghosts. The moments when he loses touch with reality are getting more and more frequent.

Took him to GP this morning and the GP said he would do the referral for the ASD assessment.

[Peterandrew29]

Your son shows blatant signs of Asbergers. Self harming is an issue.By my experience CAMHS are not fit for purpose . They recognised 1 out 6 issues between my boys. Utterly clueless. That list includes Educational Psychologist , LS teachers clueless , the list goes on.
Look on PlanetAutisms blog page , the info sheets are excellent. The articles on her FB page about, eating, homework, anxiety etc are excellent.
I am now trying to get a diagnosis of PDA , Pathological Demand Avoidance Syndrome. Check out the PDA Society website. Also look for Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, dyscalculia , the co Morbid issues.
Hope this helps .xx