Calling mum's of 2 year old NT daughters

[Babieseverywhere]

Just wondering if you could answer a few questions

1. How many verbal words does your daughter use ?
   

1. Would she ignore you, if you call her name ?
   

1. How difficult or easy is it to strap her into car seat/pram ?
   

1. How much and how loudly does your daughter scream ?
   

1. Would your daughter play on their own for half an hour or take themselves upstairs to bed ?
   

1. Does your daughter get very upset if you are not around, even when daddy is with them ?
   

1. Anything else you want to tell me that NT two year old girls do or don't do.

[Babieseverywhere]

That said feeling more positive today....what will be, will be :)

[Babieseverywhere]

I was originally just worried about 6yo DS

He has been a nightmare to get to school every day (bar a couple) last school year.
School say he is fine, it is normal for boys to hate school and refuse to come in every morning and suggested I do a parenting course.

Audiology consultant said 6yo DS has sensitive hearing and she has concerns about social communication difficulties.

SALT is half way through assessment on 6yo DS and said verbally he has social communication difficulties.

School and I filled out AQ questionaires. I marked them online about 6yo DS.
Ours shows high score for possible ASD. Schools contradicts themselves in the answers and STILL either just over line or just under..depending on which scoring bands the Comm Paed team are using.

Currently awaiting Comm Paed appointment and dreading return to school for 6yo DS

But following last week's two year check on 2yo DD3. She scored very low on speech & language AND hearing & language AND interactive social sections on the test. She is only operating at 15 month level in these areas.

Yet she got to 3 yo level on visual processing, before she got bored and threw the rest of the cards down.

The nurse testing her said DD3 had a spiky profile and there are concerns with being two levels down on those three sections mentioned above and therefore she wanted to refer DD3 to Comm Paed and for a hearing test.

She wouldn't say what the concerns related too..I asked if it was social communication difficulties but she said she wasn't qualified to speculate further and it is best that DD3 is checked out by Comm Paed.

So now I am worried about both children...bless them.

[Lovelydiscusfish]

Dd, 2:4, has lots of words ( but has massive vocabulary compared to most kids her age, according to nursery). She rarely responds to her name, unless and until she feels like doing so (manipulative darling). She doesn't scream much, never has, and is always pretty cool with going into car seats, buggies etc. She will only occasionally play on her own for half an hour, perhaps if absorbed in painting or similar, and would never, ever, ever, take herself to bed! She rarely asks for me over her daddy (or others) but to be fair, she was in nursery from 5 months old due to expediency on my part, so this would perhaps be unlikely (don't get me wrong - we are very well bonded I feel).
Good luck OP - hope all works out for you and your lovely dd.

[dashoflime]

I have a son, just turned two. He is NT as far as I know:

1. Not counted the number of words. He's still at the one word at a time stage- not proper sentences. A sample: "Mam, MAM!! Juice. Go: juice, socks, Hudl, hats!" Translation: "Good morning mother, I have just awoken. I should very much appreciate it if you would bring me breakfast and assist me to dress. After that I would like to watch fireman Sam on your portable tablet devise."
   

1. He would sometimes ignore me if I was trying to get his attention for something boring like a nappy change. If he suspected cake of toys might be on the cards he would pay attention. He doesn't ignore his childminders who is better at parenting him than I am
   

1. It can be difficult to strap him into a buggy if he doesn't want to go in it.
   

1. He's more a winger than a screamer.
   

1. I have seen him play on his own for 15 mins at playgroup. Usually he will check in with me at around the 10 main mark. For example- he'll come and show me a toy and I'll give him a little hug and say Hi and then he'll toddle off on his way. He will not put himself to bed. Sometimes he fights sleep so hard he will literally be clawing at his face to pull his own eyelids open.
   

1. No, he's happy to be with Dad or childminder.

[plinth]

DD 22 months

1. Not loads. Maybe 20, but understands a lot more. Some 2 word "sentences", rarely.

1. Yes, if distracted or simply not interested!

1. Not difficult usually. If she is messing around then force is occasionally applied.

1. Doesn't scream a lot but when she does, Jesus it makes your ears ring.

1. Yes, she likes playing on her own. She will trot off to bed if asked, although not every time.

1. Yes, worse if I'm in the house but separated eg in the loo. When out with family she will cling at first but then be easily distracted.

1. She's happy, content, independent, but a mummy's girl and very stubborn

[adrianna22]

It's so weird Nicecupoftea... DS non verbal communication skills are his best skills. He can understand facial expressions, tone, gestures, shares interests...but yet he still has an ASD diagnosis. Though saying that, they did have to assess him three times! Plus are now considering if actually DS just has a learning disability (sigh) but DS is too complex and quite young to tell.

To the OP, I understand the worrying, believe me I've been there. But I distracted myself from worrying to actually just working on my DS's needs.

What child are you worried about, regarding social communication difficulties?

Doesn't matter, but for the last few years I've been searching websites to properly explain the difference or absent skills of kids who are at risk of having social communication difficulties and I found this site > Go on www.teachmetotalk.com, The speech therapist has her own podcasts, which is on her website or download over 200 of her podcasts on ITUNES. But they explain every question regarding parents worries about communication, behaviour problems, speech, sensory needs and gives you loads of advice. It has given me a better understanding and if you listen to it, I hope you find the answers your looking for.

[Babieseverywhere]

Thanks adrianna22

[adrianna22]

Babieseverywhere I didn't mean to make you upset. Sorry I've hurt you. I just read your title thread and judged it without actually knowing what you were really applying. So I'm sorry again. I won't judge a thread so hastily and no I don't think you are insensitive.

[givemecaffeine21]

DD is 2 years 1 month..

1. Too many to count, she has a large vocabulary and is using sentences.
   
2. Not often unless engrossed
   
3. Not had an issue there
   
4. Probably a couple of times a day we have a screaming/crying fit over something, some days none, on others every 2 minutes. She is exceptionally whiny though, everything is said in a reeeeally annnoyiiiiing vooooice
   
5. Will play alone quite happily for 30 minutes, often more. Doesn't take self to bed because we always do that but if we asked her to climb in unassisted she would. She understands and obeys requests.
   
6. No, she's ok with me not being around, although sometimes gets a bit stroppy when I return.

[Babieseverywhere]

I should add I also have two daughters aged 8 yo and 4yo, who I am not worried about and are very happy at school and were relatively normal easy toddlers.

They had tandrums etc...but nobody stared at them when them screamed, much easier to get dressed and change nappies.

So I am not a poor parent, I have two very well behaved children as well.

Sigh..DD3 will catch up, won't she ?

DS will like school this year, won't he ?..please. .I can not have another school year like last year.

I am not sleeping as DD3 isn't and all I do is worry about DS and DD3. :(

[Babieseverywhere]

Honestly...I am confused.

I am very worried about 6yo DS and his quirks and anxiety at school which the school dismissed as poor parenting only, he is just a boy.

I would of said up to last week that 2yo DD3 is a feisty difficult toddler. Similar hard work to how DS was at her age. She has no sense of danger, very brave. But she is highly social with family (unlike DS) but pushes past strangers like he does.

She needs to catch up with her speech, which I think she will. I think she is too young too label and frankly wish all help/support to be direct to DS who really struggles.

I don't know...just keep on loving them and see what happens.

[Babieseverywhere]

Honestly...I am confused.

I am very worried about 6yo DS and his quirks and anxiety at school which the school dismissed as poor parenting only, he us just a boy.

I would of said up to last week that 2yo DD3 is a feisty difficult toddler. Similar hard work to how DS was at her age. She has no sense of danger, cry brave. But she is highly social with family (unlike DS) but pushes past strangers.l like he does.

She needs to catch up with her speech, which I think she will. I think she is too young too label and frankly wish all help/support to be direct to DS who really struggles.

I don't know...just keep on living them and see what happens.

[NiceCupOfTeaAndASitDown]

DD is 22 months, DS is awaiting a multidisciplinary assessment for sensory issues and possible ASD but I'm fairly confident she is NT

1. I haven't counted but she's stringing 3-4 word sentences together (or often longer but misses words out) - her speech is not always clear but she makes herself known or will find another way to communicate (showing us/baby signs)
   
   
2. rarely unless she was a teasing or very engrossed in something
   
   
3. if she's happy about the idea it's very easy but if not she will arch her back, kick her legs and scream that she doesn't like it and wants to walk. It often helps to offer a diversion such as food or ask if she wants to climb in by herself
   
   
4. many times a day but if you wait a few seconds and ask her to use her words she usually will
   
   
5. probably but not if I wanted her to! If she wants my attention she'll make a huge song and dance about it and not leave me alone but she is quite capable and willing to amuse herself at times. she would never take herself up to bed, she needs a lot of encouragement to wind down and a routine and my presence to get her to sleep
   
   
6. yes unless she's walked around in the pushchair. I've not been able to leave her yet even with DH, she's very much all about mum at the moment but I suspect it's an age thing and the fact I'm a SAHP
   
   
7. the main difference between her and DS I'm noticing is that she learns from mistakes and can be 'trained' - for example I count to 3 if they're not doing something I've asked them to do/not do...DS totally ignores me and I have to physically do the thing myself or stop him, she jumps to it before I get to 2! I don't think she's particularly compliant (she's very headstrong) - I think she's just worked out that she'd rather have the chance to do the thing herself. She also seems to understand danger and tone of voice where DS doesn't. but as you have other DC you probably already know they differ in many ways for many reasons not just whether they're NT or not. I'm a strong believer that we know our own children so hopefully there's no cause for concern. I think it's good in a way that your HV is on the ball though, I know I've had my concerns brushed off many times..I'm not sure if that's worse or them thinking something is amiss when we don't ???

[Babieseverywhere]

Thanks Cowpat...Hope the hearing test goes well this week.

[Dontstepinthecowpat]

In the interest of balance DD 2.2 has been seeing comm pead for six months. No dx yet.

She says between 10-15 words
She will ignore me 90% of the time
She will go in car seat/buggy without question
Her screeching is extremely high pitched, with excitement not tantrums
She will play on her own for hours and will go to bed without tantrum (I understand the playing on her own isn't a great sign - is going to bed easily one also?)
She doesn't cry for either parent

Other info
She has a hearing test this week, referral was prompted by problems with walking and my concern that she was very different from her brothers from a very young age.

[JellyMould]

1. Around 200?
2. Sometimes responds, sometimes doesn't, knows her name though.
3. Often has to be forced into pushchair and car seat. Stops screaming a minute or so after she is strapped in though.
4. Tantrums are big news at present. Throws herself on the floor screaming. Rarely lasts more than a couple of minutes. Bloody loud though.
5. Will play on her own quite well for up to 20 mins. Has taken herself to bed once or twice.

[Babieseverywhere]

I am going to enjoy the relative quiet while we have it....when DD3 catches up talking that will increase the noise volume by 25% !

[kelda]

My dd1 was similar, but unfortunately her delay in talking was put down to being bilingual. It wasn't until she was nearly four that her hearing was tested and she needed grommets. Her talking improved after that.

Try not to worry. It's good that they are referring her so early because the earlier these problems (if there are any problems) are picked up on, the easier it is to sort them out.

They can test a baby's hearing so don't worry too much about how they will test your two year old - they will have the experience to carry out the test.

[NotCitrus]

Being able to hear certain sounds doesn't mean she mightn't have problems with others, like speech sounds. Children's hearing tests are designed to catch their attention, so looking to see if they appear startled by sounds coming from different directions. Works most of the time even on babies.

[Babieseverywhere]

She is currently dancing on her tip toes, spinning around the middle of the living room, trying to catch a balloon. She loves dancing :)

[Babieseverywhere]

I am not concerned about her hearing at all..she can hear the rustle of a crisp packet from the next room.

Plus I am unsure how they will test her hearing properly, when she often ignores sounds plus she only has 5 words !

[ThinkIveBeenHacked]

1 - too many for me to count. I There doesnt appear to be anything she wants to say that she cant
2 - Rarely
3 - Easy
4 - Rarely (usually when running around with a friend letting off steam)
5 -Yes she would play alone but we takr her to bed as we like to do storytime
6 - she spends as much 1-2-1 time with dad as she does with me
7 -She can put on her own shoes and take them off, is potty trained in the day inc pulling down and pulling up her own trousers and knickers, can count to twenty (objects not just reciting), can recite the alphabet and numerous nursery rhymes, never stops bloody moving even when sitting still, has a great memory (will tell us about the time she saw a rainbow when on holiday a year ago eg),

[NotCitrus]

Glad you've been referred for a hearing test - do chase via the GP if you haven't got an appt in a couple weeks. Glue ear and similar can be resolved fairly easily and make a huge difference.

[Babieseverywhere]

DD3 likes to plays on her own, she is very independent and does not need me to play with her.

She does bring me things, not to show me but for me to carry for her. She is very affectionate and often hops on my knee for a cuddle on her terms. She will drag me around by my hand, to get the toys/food she wants

She might be very slow at talking, but she is a very lovable toddler, who has no problem communicating her needs !

[SmashleyHop]

Dd is 2.6

1.) She's a little chatter box. I can have a fairly good convo with her. She's pretty much caught up to Ds who's almost 4.

2.) She would ignore me yes- especially if she was involved with something. Stubborn Mare.

3.)See stubborn mare comment. ^ If she's in a good mood I can usually coax her in.

4.) She could out scream a banshee. Both in volume and pitch.

5.) She will play on her own fine for 30-45 minutes, she will come to check on me by then. She's also quite happy to play with her brothers.

6.) Nope- she is perfectly happy if I leave the room. Sometimes she gets upset if someone leaves the house but that's because she likes to go out. She's not picky about who she is with.