Is 6 months a difficult phase? I feel like I can barely cope

[emeraldgirl1]

DD is 6m 1 week.

She is having a terrible phase.

Teething is reaching absurd levels, she is in discomfort most of the time, I think, but no teeth yet.

She has been ill with a cold.

But these things aside, she is just so difficult about everything!!! Whine/grizzles ALL the time - putting her into her pushchair, putting her into her high chair, changing her nappy, changing her clothes...

I think she wants to do more than she is able? Does that make sense? She wants to feed herself, for sure, as she is refusing the spoon etc from me. But she is too little to get anything at all substantial in her mouth, which makes her hungry, which makes her grizzle more...

She wants to crawl, but can't, so gets frustrated.

She gets quite easily bored, I think, I am run ragged trying to entertain her but obviously basic housework etc needs to be done, I can't just entertain her 24/7

Thanks God she isn't a dreadful sleeper.

Is this normal or not? I worry because I have VERY spirited (aka out of control) nieces and nephews and I don't think I could cope if she was just one of those children who never do anything willingly. At the mo I feel like everything is a bit of a battle, that she is unhappy no matter what I do.

Of course then I get a wonderful smile out of the blue and it all seems fabulous again... until the next problem!

[Ms452]

Well @emeraldgirl1 did she improve with age? I'm going though it now accept my 6 month old seems chronically tired and won't nap and wakes up early in the morning.

[Misty9]

Oh, and if no teeth yet then liquid anbesol (NOT the gel) was a lifesaver. Can get it in boots when there's not a shortage

[Misty9]

Ooh six months it is seared on my brain! Ds seemed to turn into devil grumpy baby overnight, and it got so bad (as in I really couldn't see why he was sooo grumpy) I almost took him to the children's home doctor! Then, like magic, it passed when he turned 7mo.

As for weaning, just stick some cooked veggies in front of her perhaps? Less work for you, and she might enjoy the distraction of playing with it? I wouldn't stress too much about solids intake, ds didn't eat much until 10.5mo (then back on strike at 12mo for bloody teething) and basically lived off milk for the first year of his life! Now 2yo and a healthy toddler :)

[Ladyhawke127]

Been there with the teething thing. Amber teething beads is all I will say. Amazing things!! Good luck, it does get better!

[giraffeseatpineapples]

emerald totally with you on teething it is the worst app they need to learn to cope with pain

def look into babyled weaning as someone suggested. The nicest thing is at lunch when its just you two make something for youself and snuggle up with her, maybe on a big armchair and let her try little bits from your plate but the emphasis should just be on you eating your lunch and enjoying it and her experimenting with putting food in her mouth. At the moment most of her calories are coming from milk so no need to stress. Jacket potato and cheese might be a good one to start with? It takes away slaving over preparing little mini pots of home made baby food. If you decide to try babyled weaning do look into it properly though as there are rules around safety and prob what I have described works better with an older baby. I think when my dc started I would prepare my meal with something in it (a brocolli with a good stalk for them to hold say) that was suitable for their age and give them that on their tray of their high chair.



Also sshhh this is terrible, I used to give my youngest dd ella chicken pouches in her pushchair several times a week and let her eat them straight from the pouch herself. I didnt heat them or anything. eeek would never have done this with my first (she still asks for pouches occasionaly and nearly 3)

[emeraldgirl1]

Partly a joke, not parky...

I sound like a real old moany pants re reading my posts... I did know how hard it would be and I didn't have a baby just so she would coo happily at me while I made her organic treats... But still, I am only human, and all the days of drudgery would be just fine if not permanently accompanied by the grumps.

I do love her so much though. Honestly, she is a little trouper.

[emeraldgirl1]

Botticelli, yes, DH keeps trying to cheer me up with claims that its all just because she's so intelligent... (!) so maybe it will all be a distant dream when we're old and grey and living off all the money she's made with her inventions/legal career/ best selling novels... ;)

Salbertina, you have hit the nail on the head exactly. I am feeling quite overwhelmed by the sudden shift to giving her actual food at mealtimes. Milk by itself was a breeze!!! Plus factoring in all the clearing up, hosing down the high chair (only parky a joke) etc... Blending stuff, steaming stuff... I am not a fan of cooking or kitchen duties anyway so it's all a bit of a shock to the system, in addition then I can't relly even enjoy the process of feeding her as she is so so cross about it all. I think all the running around cooking broccoli etc etc would be made less stressy if she would just eat a bit and/or enjoy it! I do freezer cubes but still I seem to be doing a lot of kitchen time, she grizzles the entire time I clear up as well...

[emeraldgirl1]

Thanks giraffes and Ain't Nobody... God, if only babies were just born with teeth!! (Tho I guess that wouldn't make bf much fun...)

I am indeed hoping its just everything all at once, then she'll be a dream for the next, say, 18 years.

I feel bad about finding it so hard, she is sleeping next to me now and is so beautiful and I know how absurdly lucky I am to have her. Grumpiness and all. Plus I am probably being unfair, she is a cheery little soul a lot of the time. But when she gets in a state, which is very regularly, there is no solution it seems!

Calpol is a godsend, we gave her some this evening and about twenty mins later she was suddenly all sunshine and roses! Makes me realise how much of the misery is teething and now of course this bloody cold/flu season.

I think I am also just finding feeding her a real source of misery, she is getting so so frustrated that she can't feed herself anything remotely substantial but won't let me feed her (mouth clamped shut) and thn she is obv so frustrated as she just sts in her high chair and grizzle, cries, or sometimes just shrieks.

Dear god, having just said she was sleeping peacefully she has just let out the most awful bloodcurdling yell in her sleep!! Must be the teeth, surely?

[Salbertina]

I remember it being suddenly v busy and timing key - food as well as milk to prepare and give plus they're on the move! An exhausting combo! Preparing food in advance (ice cube trays) and a safe area to leave - playpen or rome such essential.

[BotBotticelli]

Sympathies OP - I firmly believe that some babies are just harder work than others. My DS is a real little handful and has been since he was born! He is now 10mo and I have found that he has been especially 'challenging' in the run up to every new developmental milestone. Sitting at 6mo was tricky, the run up to crawling at 8monwas hideous! He is now gearing up to walk an is being a total grizzly horror again!

In between each period of horror though there were a few weeks of relative calm. Although I will be honest with you, he never has been - and I suspect never will be - a calm or placid baby. A couple f older friends with older children reassure me that his grumpiness as a baby is probably down to him being fiercely intelligent...! I am hoping that he is going to be some sort of Nobel Laureate, the way he was kicking off today :-S

Anyway no helpful comments here other than roll with it, make sure you get breaks when you can: I got DH to look after DS for the whole afternoon today and went to the cinema with a friend. Was amazing how much more patient and calm I felt with him once I had been 'away' for a few hours.

And don't worry: you're not the only one with 'that' baby who always has to walk out of baby groups etc. it's exhaustin isn't it??

[AndIFeedEmGunpowder]

Yes, yes really think it's definitely normal. Lots of people don't talk about their babies being difficult or not sleeping until a long time afterwards.

Six months is also tricky because you're lead to believe it gets suddenly much easier at that point, when actually they are frustrated that they can't talk/sit up/move AND you are getting to grips with weaning and teething. IMO 8/9 months is much easier.

Sounds like you are doing a great job anyway Emerald.

[giraffeseatpineapples]

Sounds like you are going through lots of difficult stages at once which hopefuly means you are getting them all over and done with ahead of schedule! I remeber when my first was about 12 months sitting with him and thinking wow I really enjoyed my day with you today and being stunned!

Repeat the mumsnet chestnut 'this too will pass'.

[AintNobodyGotTimeFurThat]

I'm with you with the teething.

My daughter is a week away from 6 months old and she's teething terrible. She actually has 5 teeth buds that are going to come through soon, including one at the back which apparently is very rare. Her left top tooth seems to be the closest to coming through and I do feel for her. She is also just getting over a cold and was struggling to sleep during that phase.

She's not too whiny though, but more than she has been previously if you see what I mean. She's the easiest going baby so when she does whine you always think something is proper up but it tends to be her teeth. She teeths on my boobs, on her bottle, on her teethers, on her dummy, on her clothes if she would be allowed to - anything bless her.

She has had calpol/paracetamol most days of the last few weeks, to be honest. We try and limit it to bed time, but a few times had to give a morning dose too, to make her feel less sad.

I am sure it's just a phase as everything is changing for them. They are beginning to learn to sit up by themselves, they are beginning solids, they are starting to sleep through the night (most, not all), they are beginning to understand meaning in voices and they are beginning to become more clingier to Mummy and Daddy. It's perfectly understandable all these things make them a little irritable, as well as the teething of course.

I hope you get a bit of relief soon and your baby too, of course. :)

[emeraldgirl1]

Sorry... Finally... I am hoping things will get better when she can sit up too... Oh, and what I wouldn't give for her to get a blooming tooth or two.

I do feel a bit overwhelmed at times, she is such a wonderful little character but full-on at the best of times. I can't wait for her to be able to express herself verbally as I think that may help too?

[emeraldgirl1]

Oh, and good advice thank you re getting out, classes etc... I am out with her a LOT at the mo as it makes her much less grumpy. We do one baby class in the week too and we try to meet up with other mums. Trouble is that those things are hard with the cold she has had... Oh and just today she has a new sniffle!!

[emeraldgirl1]

Treasure basket is a fantastic idea!! God, you MN lot, how do you all know these things?! I am a creative person but that kindof thing never occurred to me. Will assemble a couple tonight.

I think she is hungry tbf, she is off her food with the cold/throat and teething and also just desperate to feed herself stuff but obv most of it ends up all over the place when she tries.

Glad to hear its normal, I am not the most confident in my parenting skills, I am ok at being fun mummy but struggle when I don't know how to make her happy.

[stargirl1701]

It's really simple. Just a basket filled with stuff. I had themed baskets (sorry, I'm a teacher ). Like:

Colour based - red, blue, yellow, etc.
Shapes - spheres/circles, cubes/squares, etc.
Materials - wood, plastic, metal, etc.

If you are on Pinterest there are lots if inspiring ideas. I changed one item in each basket every day to keep her interest. She would sit for 20-30 minutes 'playing' at 6 months - totally absorbed in the basket. Tbh, the basket itself held her interest for a couple of weeks!

[Mumof3xx]

I was also going to suggest wonder weeks as six months is around the time of the fifth leap
My dd has entered this leap about a week ago

She is grumpy, waking more in the early hours also full of a cold and a cough

[Picklesauage]

My DD struggled all through her 6th month with teething. I cannot speak highly enough of nurofen. It saved our sanity.

I went to my GP about the teething issue. He said it was ok to give calpol or nurofen everyday for a month. He said make then comfortable, it is specially designed for babies and in fact the dosage on bottle is slightly low on purpose.

I sympathise, good luck.

[minipie]

DD was massively grumpy for about 3 weeks leading up to when she turned 6 months. it was i think developmental angst (she was learning to sit up) combined with first teeth appearing. Then suddenly it all stopped once she could sit and the teeth came through, thank GOD. it was so wearing!

she's doing it again a bit at the moment (learning to crawl and cruise, another tooth, and she's got a never ending cold as well) but not as bad as the 6 month grumps.

Try getting out of the house as much as you can - I found distraction was the best at de grumping DD. also, give her a toy to hold while you change her nappy; give her some finger food to play with while you feed her; or get a high chair toy (eg the Sassy fascination station was a lifesaver for me!) etc. Can you borrow a Jumperoo or similar from anyone? we had one and I would put dd in it when I really needed to get something done - it was great.

[pebblepots]

Yeah normal, also milk is still her main food until she is a year old, so don't be relying on solids to fill her up. She is just learning about food and feeding herself before that.

[oohdaddypig]

Also I know it's hard when others kids are chilled but that will soon change

My relaxed little angelic dream boat baby waited until 18 months to show me she was actually a monster screaming tantrumy dervish. . At 6-12-15 months she was one of those chilled babies....

[oohdaddypig]

I think it depends on the baby when they become more "difficult".

And they all do, in my experience, just at different ages.

Sounds like your DD is utterly fed up being full of the cold, not being able to get around and sore gums.

Sounds trite but those squishy plastic things that chill in the fridge - have you always got then on hand? Also is she hungry eg needing way more solids? I know lots do BLW but my babies needed solids and purées as they were hungry. Lots of mums will soon say that they only a few solids at this stage and milk is the main food but my monkeys were starving at this stage.

[BrianButterfield]

Also - if you can lay hands on a Jumperoo they are brilliant at this stage.

[BrianButterfield]

Normal - 6 months was worse than the newborn stage for me. They realise there's so much they can't do, I think, and get really frustrated! Once they can move around and communicate moire it gets better.