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Baby names

Changing 12 month olds name

53 replies

Rivan424 · 16/04/2019 06:36

Here's the thing, I had a name picked out for my son that I had always planned to call him. After giving birth, I found out no one in my family approved of the name and in a horrid mixture of pregnancy hormones and anxiety, I instead chose a random name that the doctor suggested. I am a single mother with no father figure in my child's life, so probably cared far too much about the opinions of my family members.

I have regretted this decision ever since and hate telling people his current name. I've decide after much heart ache and soul searching to change his name to what I truly wanted to call him, the name I feel suits him better than his current name. The only thing is that because he's at the 12 month mark, if I change his name now it will forever show on his birth certificate and I will have to explain to him as an adult how I misnamed him as a child.

Has anyone else been through this and has it affected their child later in life to have a different name the birth cert and the actual name a post script at the bottom?

OP posts:

Rtmhwales · 16/04/2019 06:39

Haven't done this myself but I changed my name legally when I was 12. It never bothered me having a different name on the original.


englishdictionary · 16/04/2019 06:41

Get a goldfish. Call it the name you like. Leave your child's name alone. This thing about renaming children is quite bizarre. Your child is a year old already!


HeyJude81 · 16/04/2019 06:43

If that’s what you want and that’s what you’re happy with-go for it! Your DC will probably quite enjoy telling the story of their ‘2 names’ as they get older! If it feels right to you, that’s what matters!


Marlena1 · 16/04/2019 06:44

I think that's a much smaller deal than him having a name that you hate. I had a friend like this(different actual name to the one she was called) and I think she actually loved it. My dad's like this also (and my mam which I never thought was odd before writing this commentConfused) He can change properly when older to avoid confusion.


GemmeFatale · 16/04/2019 06:45

Change it. You’ll feel happier and he’ll be happier if you are.


SnuggyBuggy · 16/04/2019 06:46

If the baby is already responding to their name I think it's too late to change it personally


MyOtherProfile · 16/04/2019 06:47

Could you just add the new name? So either make it Newname Oldname Surname or Oldname Newname Surname. Then you can just start using the new name. Lots of people change between 2st name and middle name.


MyOtherProfile · 16/04/2019 06:47

I wouldn't worry about it being too late... my children responded to a specific nickname each as well as their own names when they were little.


Rivan424 · 16/04/2019 06:55

to be honest, I'm not really worried about him not responding/being confused with the name change. I always called him by nick names rather than his actual name and have been calling him by the preferred name for quite a while now (since around 9 months), to be sure it was what I wanted. I didn't realise the cut off was 1 year or I would have changed it officially earlier :( My only concern is if it will affect him as an adult later in life or if he'd be upset on finding out he was named something else at birth.

OP posts:

MercyBodle · 16/04/2019 07:46

From what you have said I would definitely change it. The sooner the better. He will get used to it. And you will have a story to share with him about how he has the most special name that you have always loved, that you went to special effort to make sure he had it. (And don't discuss it with family beforehand - just make a 'no discussion' announcement when it's done). And don't beat yourself up - you'd be surprised how common this it. In time you can look back with your son and laugh about his birth certificate and the story!


BelulahBlanca · 16/04/2019 07:52

Kids find this sort of thing cool. Then when he’s older explain why you changed it.


timetogetgoing · 16/04/2019 07:55

Sounds like it will really bother you if you don't change his name and your little one won't remember what he was called as a baby. Have you looked into the legalities of changing a first name? Is it easier if there is no father's name on birth certificate? If father's name is on bc do you need his consent?


Rivan424 · 16/04/2019 08:09

Timetogetgoing - there is not fathers name on the birth certificate, so the process is really simple. I just have to sign and hand in the correct form and pay a fee, then the new birth cert with the name change (old name and new name present) will be mailed back. I think it is probably the best thing to do FOR ME, I'm just not sure how he would feel later in life. Would be much more convenient if I'd done this sooner, then there would be no evidence of my mistake and I'd never have to explain it to him as an adult! :(

OP posts:

Rivan424 · 16/04/2019 08:15

MercyBodle - Definitely a good idea about not telling anyone until it's done. I just regret so much that I made this mistake to begin with and was hoping I'd never have to tell him haha. I definitely can't be the only mother whose been so stupid though, so I'm sure there are other adults out there with visibly altered birth certs :)

OP posts:

NottonightJosepheen · 16/04/2019 08:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SnuggyBuggy · 16/04/2019 08:20

I'd change it then OP


timetogetgoing · 16/04/2019 08:25

By the time he's old enough to ask and understand you can have an amusing story to tell about it. Change it if t makes you happy. He will pick up on our feelings if he grows up with you not liking His name - that's worse IMO. Glad it's an easy process for you to get it sorted. Change and enjoy Smile


coragreta · 16/04/2019 08:26

My name was changed and it caused a lot of trouble when I applied for my marriage license as I had no proof. There is no central data base so if you lose the paper work it causes a lot of hassle.


timetogetgoing · 16/04/2019 08:26

On your feelings!


Marcipex · 16/04/2019 08:29

I don't think it's a massive deal.
I am called by a completely different first name, by my own choice.
I used to feel a bit awkward about it, when at work one day it turned out no one there was using their first names.
Julie's real name was Lucy, Lucy's real name was Marie, Sarah's real name was Dawn.
So just add the new name and enjoy it.


SimonJT · 16/04/2019 08:34

I changed my sons when he was two, his situation is a little different as he is adopted and his birth first name was very unusual. I started by calling him first name new name and slowly reduced first name. He is almost
four now and I do talk to him about his old name v new name in an age appropriate way as lots of things in his memory box have his old name on.


OhMyDarling · 16/04/2019 08:38

Interested in the names!
What are they??
FYI I think you should go for it. We are all a little bonkers after birthing so I totally get you. I’d add it as a second name then phase it it before never using the old one again. Go for it!


Helsvamp · 16/04/2019 10:21

People didn't like my sons name but got use to it he is called Rojan and is 2 years old . And my 4 year old is called Johannah and my mum and one of her teachers keep calling her Joanna which pisses me off . And one of teachers in nursery spell it wrong without the h on the end. Teachers are meant to be educated lol


ImHastingsDarling · 16/04/2019 10:27

I would definitely call him new name old name surname.

What are the names out of interest? If there was so much negative reaction to the original name maybe it isn't a great idea ?
Tell us, you know we will be honest!


Toooldtocareanymore · 16/04/2019 10:36

just do it, and explain to him later you preferred x name had always called him x name since he was little, it suited him better, it was special to him,, (- kids love it when their names are special) so made sense to properly change it, my son was at a crèche with a little boy called Sasha, started school he was teased about girls name , even though it isn't, so parents changed it to Alexander, he was 6 or 7, they called him Alexi- which is what teachers now call him, which is what they had pretty well always called him, as they view Sasha and Alex as interchangeable ( mum was Russian) , anyway we hadn't seen him for a few years my son saw him on bus said hi Sasha and the little boy just said hi X its Alexi now to my good friends, and my son said can I call you Alexi and was thrilled when told yes.

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