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Baby Names - why are some people so rude?

151 replies

Metrobaby · 17/05/2004 12:41

OK a bit of a rant here. My ds was nameless when he was born, but now 3 weeks on dh and I finally compromised on a name - Isaac.

Now I know whatever name you pick there will always be people who like it, and other people who don't. However, I am really surprised by some people's reactions to the name we chose. I've had some that have laughed, someone who asked if I was serious, someone who said 'oh dear', MIL who decided she's going to call him Ben (one of our considered alternatives) regardless, and my family who keep coming up with alternatives.

It just makes me fume - especially as I don't think the name we chose is that unusual. If people don't like the name why can't they keep their opinions to themselves? Or am I odd in that I would never dream of telling anyone that their baby's name was not nice?

I think I could do with one of Twinkie's famous put down lines ...

OP posts:
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scottishmummy · 04/11/2012 21:28

well whatever,as isaac will now be 8
and baby names I think you'll get an honest online response
in rl I'd never let on I don't like a name,too late, smile and wave,just smile and wave

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lopsided · 04/11/2012 21:18

This child is now 8!

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mathanxiety · 03/11/2012 23:50

This is a thread from 2004, people!!

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dementedma · 03/11/2012 22:30

Ds is Joseph. Its not difficult. Its not Joe. its not Joey.Its Joseph. Why do people insist on shortening it?

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Leonas · 02/11/2012 20:00

It is a lovely name! If people are asking for honest opinions before a baby is born then they obviously want people to be brutal but once the name is chosen what is the point of expressing an opinion - you obviously love it and are happy with it so their opinion isn't going to change it.
My gran called my wee cousin Paul for quite a while after he was born as she didn't like Antony - she also wanted to know what my name was short for as she didn't really approve of it either!

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glendathegoodwitch · 12/10/2012 14:36

i have an Isaac (13) and had opposition especially from my nan who was in her 80's "didnt he do something wicked in the bible?" cue me hustling down a bible and finding all about isaac - no he was the very much wanted son of older parents Abraham and Sarah.

she didnt like tallulah for dd (6) as she thought it was Indian - yeah native american indian!!! and now we have told her our chosen name for dd3 Dottie she doesnt like that saying she'll be picked on for being daft.

but when i remind her fo her dislike for isaac & tallulah she back tracks and says she has always liked those names!!!!

she's desperately trying to get me to call this one Daisy or Alice!!!

stick to your guns!!!!

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remaincalm · 10/10/2012 15:53

I think Isaac is lovely. It is not an 'out there' name, just a normal name that you may or may not like. It is so rude for people to question your name choice.

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bigbluebump · 10/10/2012 13:56

Why is this ancient thread resurrected?!

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HoneyMum21 · 10/10/2012 13:14

It's no-one's choice but the parents what a child should be named. Isaac is a gorgeous name but even if you'd picked something more... unusal... it would still be your choice and that should be respected.
Like the poster above said, your MIL had her turn at naming babies when she had hers and now it's your turn. My MIL wants us to name our DS (due in december) after my FIL (who she is now divorced from) even though she didn't deem it right to call her son that. I do think she is going to HATE the name we have picked out but she can lump it!

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Jusfloatingby · 10/10/2012 12:54

Baby Isaac is now eight. Why are we still discussing his name? (Although I would love to know if his DG insists still on calling him Ben)

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thegreylady · 09/10/2012 16:16

oooops.....the date!!!!!!!

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thegreylady · 09/10/2012 16:15

Isaac and Max are both lovely names :)

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WhispersOfWickedness · 09/10/2012 15:01

Wow, eight years! I would love to know if MIL went to the christening, is still calling him Ben and if 8 year old Isaac likes his name Grin It is a lovely name, btw Smile

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Mintberry · 09/10/2012 14:31

Quartermass Ignatious! Sounds like a medieval knight to me!
I think Isaac is a great name, it's stood the test of time and sounds modern when shortened to Zach (or perhaps Izzy). It's on my MN shortlist, actually. Grin
I like the idea of renaming your MIL if she insists on calling him Ben! I suggest Egglantine, or Ursula.

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WaftyCrank · 30/05/2012 19:48

Blimey I didn't see the date on the OP.Shock

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WaftyCrank · 30/05/2012 19:45

Isaac is lovely, I wanted it for DS2 but DH wouldn't.

We called him Gabriel and the amount of rude comments we get is unbelievable. 'Gabriel? Eurgh!' 'That's not a boys name! Are you sure he's a boy?' 'He'll get called Gay at school. Haha!' and my favourite 'Gabriel, where on Earth did you get that from?!' Hmm

I love his name but sometimes I almost wish I'd called him something else. Damien

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StepOutOfSpring · 29/05/2012 16:44

Wow, an 8 year old thread!

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thegreylady · 29/05/2012 15:43

Isaac is a lovely name and no one has the right to object. If you were calling him something awful like Dogbreath then OK she could be forgiven but Isaac is perfect

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InterviewMAD · 29/05/2012 10:59

I think people are generally fairly pass-remarkable, and it irritates me.

Re: the Jewish thing, I don't think it's just Jewish names. I think a lot of people can be that about names they perceive as being "too black", "too Irish", "too Welsh".

I am massively pregnant and Irish, and ds has a very neutral/easy to pronounce Irish name (think Declan/Rory/Brendan/Liam/Conor). I don't know what I am having this time and if it's a boy, I will choose another similar Irish name. However, girls are more tricky. The baby already has cousins called Maeve/Sinead/Siobhan and there aren't really many more that are legible/immediately pronounceable so we will probably pick something more "unusual" in terms of spelling, thinking of Aoife (Ee-feh).

When I've discussed this with people they are literally SO dismissive of it.. and there is definitely a sort of snobbery about using "ethnic" names among certain people. Irish names in particular seem to engender suspicion. The thing is, we are happily raising our kids as English and giving them a sense of culture here, they have British passports and I'm taking my ds to some sort of toddler Diamond Jubilee extravaganza next week where he will troop the colour (while no doubt some of his forefathers squirm in their graves) BUT I and dh are Irish, and our heritage is also an important part of who they are.

I found reading the Baby Names lists on the ONS helpful as you realise just how many "ethnic" names are used in the UK and that all this nonsense about names is just that, nonsense. People grow into their names, others learn to say and spell them, all is well. I appreciate there are some more "far out" names (thinking Benson and Hedges here!) but really there is room for diversity in the world!

Isaac is lovely and VERY normal.

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lovemygirlivy · 29/05/2012 10:28

Whats wrong with Isaac - it's hardly as if you have called him sandal or something - it's a nice classic name that everyone can pronounce.

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Frontpaw · 29/05/2012 10:06

What's wrong with Isaac? I thought you were going to day 'my baby is called twinkle wonk and we like it, but people say its a terrible name...'

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Stellan · 29/05/2012 10:05

This is an eight year old thread, fi51!

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fi51 · 29/05/2012 09:59

Isaac is a very nice kind of strong name which he can grow up with unlike some names

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Paula71 · 02/06/2004 22:11

Have just read what you said, Metrobaby, about your MIL not going to the Christening. Good ridance, the best thing you can do is plan for her not to be there, that way she won't spoil what is Isaac's special day - not hers. When she says she isn't going act all matter-of-fact with an "okay" and a shrug of your shoulders, don't let her see you annoyed. God, I hate people like this!

How dare she act so presumptious? The last thing you need at the Christening is someone moaning and gurning about the baby's name, a very petty MIL you have there. Sorry.

Isaac has a lovely, traditional name and will have a wonderful Christening with all the best wishes from us!

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tallulah · 02/06/2004 20:02

We just didn't tell anyone our kids names until they were born, because we knew the reaction we'd get!

My neice has v unusual name which caused some raised eyebrows... my aunt announced "that's horrible. We'll call her second name{} instead" (but she never has ).

I recently took my 14 yo to work & got "that's an odd name", which I thought was very rude.

It's no-one else's business, and that INCLUDES grandma!

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