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AIBU?

To pay for friend ?

32 replies

Sunnytree90 · 16/09/2022 12:58

I've taken on extra hours (overtime on top of working FT) in my day job. Its quite exhausting. I would like to book a spa for the day with my friend to chill. I've got a special price/deal. I would really like to pay for her (£80 each) as she is my bestie and has treated me to things in past (but not on this value/scale). I can afford the £80 each and I cant. I could use the money to put towards debt. TBH I have so much debt that just the cost of my friend (£80) is merely a months minimum payment on my store card and it wont make a dent in what I owe what so ever. £80 is an xmas gift for my parents. £80 is my hair being cut and coloured at a decent salon near me (hair is long overdue). Paying £80 for the spa for me is more than doable. I really want to pay for her too but I also know there are so many things that the money could be used for too.

You only live once and you don't know what is around the corner.

Thoughts ?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

109 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
88%
You are NOT being unreasonable
12%
Sisisisi · 16/09/2022 16:15

This is setting yourself on fire to keep other people warm.
Why do you value your own security so little that you would do this?
Please try to work out why you have so little self worth and look at counselling to address this.

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FoolishMortals · 16/09/2022 16:18

Out of curiosity @Sunnytree90 but do you have children? If so, this would be a valuable life lesson to them.

Mum wants a spa day, but has other things to pay off. Life lesson - if you want nice things in life, you need to pay off debts first.

Life lesson applies to everyone though regardless if you have children or not.

£80 towards hair? Is it possible to buy home dye for £10 and do it yourself?

Id honestly get rid of the debt first before spending £160 on a spa day which in my opinion aren't all that cracked up to be (maybe I haven't found one that I've actually found worth the money)

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Woolandwonder · 16/09/2022 16:28

I can totally understand that it feels like a nice thing to do and that you need a treat but also that you probably are feeling quite weighed down by debt at the moment. Is there a way of you doing something together that's cheaper that you treat her to that might feel nice? Bottle of wine, pizza, some face masks and a film together might feel really nice and relaxing and not cost you much more than 20 quid?

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PinkFrogss · 16/09/2022 16:39

YABU OP, no true friend would be happy with you paying £80 to go on a spa day while you’re in debt.

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Beautiful3 · 16/09/2022 16:41

No I wouldn't. Use the money to pay off your debt. Only book treats, when you can easily afford them.

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LuftBalloons · 16/09/2022 17:16

There are loads & loads of things you can do with your friend to "chill" which don't cost £80. It's foolhardy to be so deep in debt and fritter it away on a spa day. They are so inflated in price for what they offer & a waste of money.

Go for a swim in the sea ...

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JudgeRindersMinder · 16/09/2022 17:23

I also believe in you only live once, but only after the bills are paid. It’s easier to chill for a lot less than £80 when you don’t have a big debt hanging over you.

Spa days are vastly over rated anyway.

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