To be thinking about JKR's mental health right now?

[BabyLlamaZen]

I'm not going to patronize her enough to say I'm worried, but honestly! This is too muchm

Her initial tweet showed her how these issues were already concerning her (and she expanded on these fears in her essay). Then the response was disgusting and I'm sure can't have felt great (no matter how much she expected it). No one likes to read threats of abuse, especially when you have actually gone through what she has.

Then Dan Radcliffe throws her under a bus, a few more supposed follow suit. She spends time writing this extremely thought out (and incredibly reasonable, whatever your view) essay. She has to think about and bring up a very painful past. Then she STILL gets abuse for this, including rape comments. More Harry Potter stars including supposed feminist Watson denounce her. AND DON'T EVEN MENTION THE ESSAY!

Then The Sun shares the story from her abusive ex and throws his comments all over the front page?! Disgusting!

I know she's a strong woman and I hope as hell she's got people supporting her right now. Even for someone who didn't have a history of depression, this would be horrific.

Whatever happened to 'Be Kind?'

I dont think this is going anywhere for a good while :(

[Oxyiz]

I agree about autism being a factor here. I wanted to be a boy and played at it seriously from about 9 to my mid teens probably I had my hair cut like a boy, used a boy's nickname at home, only played with boys etc etc.

It was all really because I hated girls as I didn't fit in with them or understand them. Ironically I was really scared of boys and they bullied me horribly, but I felt that I fit into their world more.

As time went on because I hated my body changing. If you'd offered me surgery to get rid of my breasts I'd have jumped at it.

NONE of which meant that I had a boys brain fighting to get out. It just meant I had a hyper sensitive body and mammoth lack of communication skills, and hated change.

[TightPants]

@ProfessorSillyStuff - that’s so interesting.
Imagine if you’d been determinedly trying to live as a boy instead, especially in this day and age.
Thanks for sharing.

[ProfessorSillyStuff]

TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair

Autism is a strange condition. I feel I should be allowed to say that as I have it. I was undiagnosed as a child though. It took a long time even for me to realise exactly why I struggled so much and exactly what it was that other people were able to do that I couldn't do.

When I was six or seven, I wanted very much to be a cat or dog. I thought maybe I could become one, if I just tried hard enough. I thought maybe no-one had ever tried hard enough before. After all, it didn't seem like this kind of aspiration was shared by others.

I tried for at least two or three years to live as an animal only growing out of it when I was 8 or 9. My poor mother.

I think I learned a lot about the nature of animals and imagination, but I never succeeded in becoming either a cat or dog. I'm quite glad of that now. I improved my social skills and I like being a human female now. I'm so very glad, that I wasn't having a different kind of identity crisis in today's culture too!

[ProfessorSillyStuff]

I'm sure JKR is reading all these threads. Though she's super busy! We love you JKR! Thank you for all you do and have done for humanity! Thanks for the great example you set for women, mothers and people everywhere! You're my hero and have been since someone very special who is no longer with us, gifted your books to me when I was sixteen.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

YANBU.
It's a sickening the way she's been treated and targeting. All for having a an opinion. (Which we are 'supposedly' entitled to, or did I miss something).
I for one am sick and tired getting dictated to as to what I can think , like dislike, agree with and disagree with and I don't think I'm the only one, to be honest.

[tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz]

My next door neighbours husband wishes to use the ladies changing room when he next goes swimming as he thinks it's a bit nicer than the men's. He's definitely a nice guy - what legitimate, provable reason is there to deny him entry too?

[TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair]

But that's also saying that these male born individuals are not allowed to identify as women if they feel an innate sense that they were assigned the wrong sex as conception.

People feel all sorts of things in life though don't they? And feelings can be really distressing and strong and all-consuming but they can also be transient and plain wrong.

We know some trans people detransition and change their minds about having been born in the wrong body.

We know many trans people don't even feel they've been born in the wrong body at all, they just get a sexual kick out of appearing feminine and being degraded or humiliated as a result.

Some mental health conditions make people feel they are the devil or that people want to kill them or that they're Jesus reincarnated. Some people feel very strongly they don't deserve to eat or they should cut themselves. Ask any psychiatrists who deal with such cases and you'll hear how incredibly distressing those feelings are to live with - they can dog people for years in a very persistent manner. It doesn't mean we change society to suit those feelings. We recognise those people need psychiatric support, ideally, and offer help.

[truthisarevolutionaryact]

Thank you for this BabyLlamaZen
I also hope that she knows how many women are so grateful for her courage in standing up for the rights of women and girls. Once women lose the right to safe sex segregated spaces, sport, hospital wards, prison cells, refuges and the rest, it will take a lifetime to get them back.
She's awesome.

.

[7Days]

Crocodiles, ewes, what's the difference?

[Susanna85]

@7Days I love that analogy, made me chuckle!
Are you sure it was sheep and not crocodiles though.

[7Days]

The idea that sex is not binary has huge implications.

Farmers should be told, for example.
Indeed, my dad is puzzled every year when he buys sheep at random at the mart and keeps finding lambs in his field in the spring.

Or maybe they are not sheep at all
Maybe it's not a field
Maybe it's not Spring when he finds them - who can tell?
Maybe he's my mum.

Biology doesnt define how any person should live their life.
But it exists - and sometimes it matters.

[Oxyiz]

God I am so sick of the app deleting paragraphs randomly.

[Oxyiz]

It's really great for you and your life that you can use mixed sex changing rooms after your experiences, but just as you say Jo doesn't speak for you, likewise you can't speak for all survivors/victims and say there isn't a problem.

Personally I don't and can't use that kind of facility after the experiences I've had. There are some women who couldn't because of their religion, or perhaps just modesty or embarrassment. Why should ANY women be barred from facilities for the sake of (literally) a small changing space to ourselves?

You might not care that a theoretical 6 foot tall bearded bloke gets changed next to you, but others will.

I also don't like the idea of being co-opted into some men's fetishes (no not all trans women, but I'm talking about the AGP turned-on-by-their-own-boobs contingent on Reddit, or the "I like to ask to underage girls about their periods" lot like Jessica Yaniv).

[DisobedientHamster]

Thanks to the poster who mentioned Posey Parker's site. I am now skint but the soon-to-be proud owner of 3 fabulous tshirts.

All the best to JK.

[Susanna85]

I have been thinking of JKR all day.
Lots of us have emailed her I think but I just hope she realises how much quiet but strong support she has.
JK's Army!! ❤️

[CaveMum]

WoodenNoses no one is assigned the wrong sex, sex is determined by biological factors at the point of conception. Sex is then observed and recorded at birth.

There is no magic womanly essence that gets trapped in a male body, I do not identify/feel like a woman - I am one because of my biology. I can cut my hair short and wear men’s clothes, but that does not mean I am a man.

The vast majority of Transwomen fall into two categories - homosexual males that appear feminine is behaviour and appearance (the type most likely to seek reassignment surgery) and AGPs (autogynephilic) who are sexually aroused by the idea of themselves as women - the type that very rarely seek full reassignment surgery.

[Ethelfleda]

Because a woman has been a abused in a relationship or sexual assaulted does not mean that every man thereafter has the potential to inflict the same damage. That's a huge leap to make

It doesn’t take EVERY man though, does it? It takes just one. Just one person with a penis granted access to a woman only space.

[WoodenNoses]

You genuinely can't imagine how some women might not want men in female spaces after being assaulted? Really?

I can imagine. But that's also saying that these male born individuals are not allowed to identify as women if they feel an innate sense that they were assigned the wrong sex as conception.

My local swimming facility has mixed sex changing rooms - though not toilets - and I'm okay with that. Because a woman has been a abused in a relationship or sexual assaulted does not mean that every man thereafter has the potential to inflict the same damage. That's a huge leap to make.

[NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace]

I think some people who menstruate are not women.

I thought for a second that you'd lost the plot but I assume the people you're referring to are 'girls'?

Yep, that must be it.

As you were, everyone!

[DisobedientHamster]

YANBU

[Oxyiz]

You genuinely can't imagine how some women might not want men in female spaces after being assaulted? Really?

[WoodenNoses]

Yes, her MH must be taking a bashing.

However, as woman who has survived DV and sexual assault, I'm still trying out why/how she has so closely correlated those experiences with transgenderism.

[TheAdventuresoftheWishingChair]

we both know, there is nothing I could ever say or do that would influence you in any way to change your view

This is interesting. In my case and I'm sure in the case of many women on here, you're absolutely wrong.

I think being prepared to change your mind in life is crucial. Regularly assessing your own views, reading widely and looking at the opposite side in a debate is so hugely important. I took many months to read widely when I first realised there was a debate raging about trans people. It felt important to consider it very seriously because it's a serious subject. I am still open to changing my mind about it depending on the strength of argument made.

If there was truly robust evidence that the brain of a trans person was more like the brain of the opposite sex, I would be changing my mind about this debate in some ways (not all, but some). As it is, that evidence is easily discredited.

Sex absolutely is binary. There are only two sexes.

Sex and gender are not the same thing, and your biological characteristics are not necessarily determinative of your gender

Absolutely agree with the first part of that sentence. And no your biological characteristics definitely don't determine your gender. But that's not because people have an innate gender which can on occasion be completely different to biological sex but because gender is nothing more than a set of socially constructed stereotypes which differ across time and culture. Hence in America, football is a girl's sport whereas here the expectation is largely that it's for boys. Likewise here girls traditionally wear make-up and do more in the way of grooming than men whereas the Woodabe men in Niger dress up and perform in beauty contests which are judged by women (and look beautiful doing so, in my opinion)

See here! www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-12215138

Gender is nothing but stereotypes. And those stereotypes are generally restrictive and harmful and should certainly not have people working to reinforced them.

[kesstrel]

Miniaturehero's statement above is misleading.

Brain studies have only shown that transwomen attracted to men have phenotypes similar to natal women (that is, transwomen who would otherwise be considered gay men).

The review she cites points out a 2011 study that found no such similarities in tranwomen attracted to women, and states that more studies are needed that actually control for sexual orientation as a confounding factor.

[wrongsideofhistorymyarse]

JKR said that only women menstruate, which is a biological fact. It shouldn't be controversial to acknowledge physical differences.