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AIBU?

Misogynist, Able-ist, Elitist and so on family members at at Christmas

15 replies

Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 07:53

Somebody mentioned this on the thread about feeling like the grinch at Christmas.
She mentioned she has in laws like this and I have to say some in dhs family are like this. Especially one BIL.
Actually I like him a bit, he is a good brother for dh... and that is what counts the most.
Actually I am not sure if he really thinks all the things he says or just does so because of the shock value. I think some of it is just Bravado.

Are there more mumsnetters having the same problem?

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 08:25

@DisplayPurposesOnly Dh always says things like “Oh, shut your pie hole, Bill“ but BIL is just amused by this and thinks it is all very entertaining. He is also often drunk at Christmas which makes him worse.

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 08:23

@Bezalelle No, I just wanted to say that I have a similar problem like the poster on the other thread and I decided to start another thread about it because I did not want to derail my old one (which was about another Topic, not about bigoted Relatives). So I started another thread.

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DisplayPurposesOnly · 24/12/2019 08:22

He loves to voice bigoted opinions and watch people reaction. It’s actually fun for him.

"You're talking bollocks again, Bill."

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CaptainMarvelDanvers · 24/12/2019 08:21

I get what you mean, you have relatives that have controversial views that they like to spout (for reaction more than anything) but aside from that they are good people.

I know that people are going to say how can they be good people if they say x, y and z so maybe not good people, but perhaps ok people?

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 08:19

@malificent7 It’s not me who starts talking about this subjects. It’s him.

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CherryPavlova · 24/12/2019 08:18

It’s Christmas. Be tolerant and forgiving. Enjoy the bits of people you are fond of and let their less pleasant views go unremarked upon or simply tease them about them. Christmas isn’t about arguing for the sake of it.
You can like/love the person but not their view on a particular subject.

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 08:15

@Thatusername: I had another thread. On this other thread a poster mentioned that she hated the fact that some of her relatives use Christmas to be bigoted, sexist and so on. I have in laws like this too. One is my BIL. He loves to voice bigoted opinions and watch people reaction. It’s actually fun for him. Apart from that he is nice. I do not know what to do.

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malificent7 · 24/12/2019 08:14

Don't talk politics and get ear plugs!

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Bezalelle · 24/12/2019 08:14

Are you trying to say that you know the OP of the BIL post and think he's ok?

and are you drunk?

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ThatUserNamesTakenTryAnother · 24/12/2019 08:12

Yes, errrmm, ay? Your post makes no sense, can you elaborate on that....

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Fairylea · 24/12/2019 08:10

I just pretend I haven’t heard people when they say stuff like that. Literally just ignore. No point in arguing with stupid.

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NameChangeNugget · 24/12/2019 08:10

Really don’t get this post?? Hmm

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 08:09

I wanted to say the I like the guy but do not like his Some of his bigoted opinions and do not know how to act if he voices - for example - a misogynist opinion like: women belong in the kitchen.
He likes to say things like this with a smirk in his face and loves it if people hate what he says.

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Flyingfish2019 · 24/12/2019 07:56

@Thatsusernameistaken: could you elaborate “ay“?

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ThatUserNamesTakenTryAnother · 24/12/2019 07:54

Confused ay?

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