Guests and rotating what you serve

[baabaamoomooneigh]

A colleague of mine keeps a notebook in her kitchen drawer, specifically to note down details of what she has served to guests. Eg "sept 2018, bob and Jill for dinner, lasagne then cheesecake"

This is so she doesn't serve the same people the same thing the next time they come for dinner.

AIBU not to do this? Am I a bad host for not caring about these details? I would never think to ensure I offer a different meal next time. Does she have too much time on her hands?

[Miane]

Hersymphony . I love the book but Mrs DeWinter is so frustrating.

I first read the book aged 12 and remember thinking that I’d have whipped Mrs Danvers (and Max) into shape pretty sharpish.

[HerSymphonyAndSong]

I was going to say the same re Rebecca, Miane

[SparklyLeprechaun]

Sounds like a good idea. I'm nowhere near organised enough to do it. I should keep track of what presents I give to people as well...

[StrawberrySquash]

I write down what I cooked in a nice notebook. It's great to go through and get ideas from. And I've put party menus in there too. Nostalgia.

[StrawberrySquash]

The first Mrs de Winter does this in Rebecca. Even at the time that book was set, the second Mrs de Winter found it remarkable.

Yes, the point is that the Rebecca is a wonderful host with legendary parties and a housekeeper who worships her. He successor is horribly aware how our of her depth she is.

[HarrietSchulenberg]

God, this is why I hardly ever entertain. On the odd occasions I've fed other people it's been informal and a lasagne, casserole or other thing that can look after itself while we all natter. I have no idea what I've cooked for people and when and I certainly wouldn't remember details of what I ate at other people's houses unless it was inedible.
Mercifully I've never poisoned anyone or been ostracised because of a meal. Perhaps my friends have similarly low standards.

[AnneLovesGilbert]

Oh god, I always wish I did this and now I’m going to start. I’ve twice realised I’ve served the same pudding to the same people and felt a bit cringe about it.

[baabaamoomooneigh]

It's a phrase used in my part of country a lot we have 'people round for dinner' or 'people over for dinner'. I've never heard anyone say they are having people to dinner

[Miane]

Callme pretty sure Gow was just looking for a >>

[Miane]

The first Mrs de Winter does this in Rebecca. Even at the time that book was set, the second Mrs de Winter found it remarkable.

Fantata but the point in the book is absolutely not that Rebecca was old fashioned and out of touch.

The point is that the new Mrs DeWinter is uneducated and useless in comparison to the cultured and highly capable Rebecca*.

The second Mrs DeWinter had no idea how to run a great house or to be a successful society hostess that’s why she found it remarkable.

*Obviously Rebecca was evil and Mrs DeWinter was young and innocent but that doesn’t change their relative competence.

[CallMeVito]

there's always one. Do you want a medal or something gowgow

[gowgow]

I never have people FOR dinner - I'm not a cannibal. I do keep a note of what I serve when people come TO dinner.

[colditz]

It would not occur to me to even consider this

[Rayna37]

I quite like this idea as we have quite a few friends we cook for very infrequently, so would prefer not to do the same thing every time eg in 2014, 2016 then 2019, like I never moved on, and I think there's a good chance that what you thought would suit certain people once is the same thing you might come up with for them again!

Worse though (expecting to be flamed) I actually do this with clothes. Not daily obvs but as I've gradually started buying fewer better clothes I realised I was choosing the same things for the same events/groups of friends/weekends away etc. Not the end of the world twice in a row but wanted to avoid wearing the same jumper to see the same people 6 times in 3 years, etc!

[baabaamoomooneigh]

She is obviously good at cooking, and so I doubt frozen pizza and wedges are in any of rotations, they are all proper 2/3 course menus. Plus she has a lot of dishes in her repertoire so the chance if someone having an identical meal are low.

[UnreasonablyPissedOff]

We have friends over very frequently and I mentally make sure we don't serve the same thing twice in a row. I also put together menus that 'go' so often serve the same 3 course but to different guests, meaning that Dh and dc and I eat the same things a bit but we like them so don't mind.

I LOVE planning dinners for friends and always include nice drinks, usually a cocktail to start and very nice wines. If we're eating Italian we'll have Italian wines, French wine with French dishes etc. But we don't make a big fuss of telling people this - we just serve.

I also make lots of desserts and I think people look forward to them.

I read cookbooks and magazines a lot and always make a mental note of any dish that would be good to make for friends!

[topcat2014]

Lasagne is my goto dish for entertaining, as I am quite good at it and can double up if needed. So, yes, you would get it on subsequent occasions here.

[ElvisParsley]

Brilliant idea! I do try to keep a mental note of what I have served people before. We host a lot and I like to try new recipes so I don’t think I have ever repeated a menu to the same guests. I know I would hate it if I did. (But all power to those who are more laid back than me!)

[ShadyLady53]

The friends I’ve had over always want the same bloody thing! Luckily not the same as each other but still. One I’ve known since I was 7 and she still wants the same thing every single time she comes over. Her relative even asked if I could deliver it to them when they were sick! Another came over almost every week and asked for mince and mash...for 10 years! My Mum wants my Mac and Cheese almost weekly.

It’s bizarre. I’m pretty experimental in the kitchen and love trying out new recipes.

[TheSpottedZebra]

^ Did that make it sound like I'm male? Cos I'm not. But I assume that this guest menu tracking thing is only done by /expected of women. And that gives me a fury.

[TheSpottedZebra]

My mum does this, and her sister/my aunt bought me one of those aforementioned journals FOR MY 21ST BIRTHDAY. Umm, thanks.

I don't do this, and neither does my DP. Do any men do this, I wonder?

[Petalflowers]

I dn’t Do this (didn’t know it was a thing).

Wouldn’t bother me if I got served the same food twice.

To be honest, if someone did serve something twice, and the guests judged, then they are being rude.

(Now panicking, ‘cause planning to serve a similar dessert to guests i’ve Done before).

[greenelephantscarf]

a friend does that.
but tbh she regularly entertains high level industy bosses together with her ceo husband.

[SadOtter]

I used to with my younger siblings when I first got my own place but only because they were much younger than me (under 10) and one of them pointed out I always gave them pasta of some sort and asked if it was all I could cook

[Downandoutnumbered]

Pre-children I used to keep a database of what I'd cooked for people, what they liked, any allergies or restrictions...

I don't do that now. But I do try to keep a mental tally of what I've fed to whom, because otherwise they get NIgella's sage and onion chicken and sausages every time they come. We've always had people round a lot - it used to be Saturday night dinner parties, and now it's Sunday lunches with the DC creating mayhem, but I'm feeding people often enough that I don't want to keep repeating myself.