To think if your 'big baby' can't behave you stay home.

[Santawontbelong]

Just back from a naice ice cream parlour, around a fiver a sundae /sweet waffle. Toppings beyond your wildest dreams. Not a fan but waited to end the hols off on a super sweet note for dc!! 4dc from 3-12. All sat super nicely (nice change!) and waited patiently to be served. A couple sat behind us, joined by dc and dgs. The little boy was a bit boisterous but not unacceptably so (about 2). Then the who's farted - was it you? Are you sure you haven't farted? You've definitely farted!
The bloody dgf!!He was winding the little boy up something ridiculous, like a bloody dc!! I mean ffs in a place people have reserved seats and are paying to eat!! Was bloody gross tbh!! Not sure if something was said to him but when we left he was sat round a corner away from the rest of the family!!
Yuck just yuck.

[mrsRosaPimento]

Thank goodness you weren’t sitting near my ds1. He has autism, so as soon as he eats he thinks of bodily functions and talks about it loudly. We shush him but he finds it difficult to change the subject. He thinks nothing of standing up and announcing he needs a poo.

[boredofmyoldname]

YABU.

On a lighter note, my brother once read about spontaneous combustion noting that one possible cause may have been methane build up. He began holding in his farts to see if he could "do it".

After a week he was gutted to see that he had not, I didn't have the heart to tell him that he slept above me in the top bunk and that whilst he may have been withholding during the day he definitely was not at bloody night time! :o

[NotACleverName]

YABU for your usage of "naice"

[Mxyzptlk]

I wouldn't care about fart talk but would definitely be annoyed by an adult deliberately trying to wind up a child, in a situation like this.

[acornsandnuts]

It was probably my FIL. :(

[NC4now]

Me neither Ducks.

“Where’s Grandad?”

“He’s in disgrace.”

[lasttimeround]

Ha ha ha that's brilliant

[Ohdearducks]

I’m sorry but I can’t stop laughing at this thread

[CherryChasingDotMuncher]

FGS it’s only a word. Not even a swear word. if they were sitting tooting them out that’d be different. I wonder how people who get upset about this go about their day without fainting.

I did chuckle at the GF in time out though


It is annoying when you’re in a restaurant and you have people next to you with boring or repetitive conversation. I remember stopping at a Little Chef with my friend when we were about 18, back from a weekend away in Newcastle. Hungover to hell and sat next to a family who, for 30 solid minutes, talked about curtains. I thought my brain was gonna explode.

.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

Rebel.
Not at the ggps. They’re probably long dead and buried. Badly worded. I’d be pissed off with the gf if I were the parents of said small child.

If we were going in the vein of blaming the ggps, maybe someone should make effigy dolls of the ggps and stick pins in them or exhume their body to exact revenge. That’ll learn them.

[RebelRogue]

@Mummyoflittledragon at the dgf’s parents?

[Mummyoflittledragon]

Rules are no toilet talk at the table. Dd was fine in the main, it was more for my friend’s ds and boy visitors. In my (limited) experience, boys need no encouragement from adults. I’d be pissed off as the parents too!

[OlennasWimple]

The V&A is thinking about making David fart every time someone walks past [wow]

[morningtoncrescent62]

I wonder whether the GF simply doesn't understand how to be around young children, and was over-compensating by trying to be hilarious as a way of bonding. My DF used to be a bit like that. He would wind my DDs up something terrible, using inappropriate unfunny 'humour' in order to disguise that he wasn't that interested in them, and then when they got uncontrollable he'd stomp off - which is what the GF in this scenario might have done.

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

Why is op getting crap for being fed up at this, when his own family banished him from the table because of his antics?
He sounds like one of those loud, obnoxious bores that everyone dreads being stuck within earshot of; it just happened to centre round farting...

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

I don't fart in front of anyone if I can help it, even my partner. I don't think that's insane and repressed.

Some couples find hilarity in each other's flatulence, a real fart fest with comments like "better out than in! What a stinker!" and some don't.

Each to their own

I wouldn't be offended if someone was joking about a fart in my ear shot though. Life's too short to get offended over small unimportant issues.

[Santawontbelong]

The grandfather was put in time out. ..
We were sat in the party area as it had a bigger table. There was only that other family in the same area. My dc were quietly eating so it was difficult not to hear every word. Why should I stay in because I don't want to hear people talking about anti social habits?

[gamerwidow]

I can’t believe anyone is so sensitive that no one can talk about farting around them. I would find it tiresome if someone loudly said the same joke over and over so in that respect I understand why it was annoying. I can’t get the fuss over toilet humour though it’s not like they were all deliberately farting or the dgf did a poo on the table of something.

[user1494815704]

Maybe you should stay home.

[MargaretTwatyer]

I never farted infront of my ex and we were together 6 years same with family. It's just rude IMO.

That's just insanity. Just, that repressed it's insane.

[Misspollyhadadollie]

I never farted infront of my ex and we were together 6 years same with family. It's just rude IMO.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

That family clearly should have gone to a common ice cream van not a very posh expensive ice cream parlour with toppings!!!

It wouldn't bother me. It's quite easy to ignore other tables and concentrate on your own family, especially if you have 4 children. It's not that offensive to joke about a fart is it?

[silenceisadistantmemory]

Hang on, the GRANDFATHER was put in timeout??

[silenceisadistantmemory]

How on earth do you manage to never fart in front of your partner? Mine has seen me give birth so farting seems pretty tame!