Good sleepers are less intelligent kids???

[SparklyFuckingBusinessFairy]

Chatting with a colleague yesterday about our babies (16 months old), and she was moaning that her DS never sleeps. DD is a pretty good sleeper these days, usually sleeps for 10-12 hours. Then she said smugly, "of course, they say poor sleepers are much more intelligent," at which I was a bit . Even if you think that, even if it's scientifically true, you don't say it in those circumstances.

However, it is certainly true that her DS is very advanced; he walked at 10 months and says loads of words, whilst DD is bang on average so far and just has a few words that all sound the same (cheese, sneeze etc).

What are your experiences - are good sleepers and easy going kids generally less smart? Or can I tell her to get stuffed with her smugness?! And was she as rude as I thought she was, or was I being hypersensitive and perceiving criticism where there was none?

[ConvincingLiar]

I think it's like birds crapping on your head being "lucky". Be grateful to have a good sleeper. Think no more of it.

[Randomer234]

I have a 3 year old who thinks sleep is for daddy and no one else he is a year behind on his speech and didn't walk until 13 months but he's very intelligent in other areas. I think she was being really rude and I think it's fantastic that your little one sleeps can I please borrow to teach my son how to sleep lol ☺

[angeldelightedme]

There is lots of research to show that more intelligent adults tend to be nightowls
I dont know if this extends to childten.

[SmellyChristmasCandles]

DHs colleague and his wife had a baby a week or so after we had our dc1. Dc1 could sleep for England whilst theirs apparently, never slept. Every day at work DH was regaled with tales of what their child could do -apparently hit all milestones ahead of time, was described as 'extremely bright'by every professional that came into contact with him, etc. And was running his parents into the ground through lack of sleep.
Otoh, our DC met some milestones early, some on time and others a little later than average. However, he slept. OMG, how he slept. 9 hours through the night from six weeks old. No sleep regression. Slept during the day. Slept and slept. I even asked he about it. She told us not to worry as all babies are different. By the time he started school we had been told he was very bright. School brought in the Ed psych as they needed advice on how to challenge him. Ed psych assessed IQ at ridiculously high level. DC still slept. Throughout school, top marks all the way. Through university, top marks all the way in STEM subject. Great degree, Great Masters, fantasy post grad qualification and now doing extremely well in his chosen profession. And still he sleeps!

[Motherfuckers]

I read an interesting article in psychology today that said those that went to bed later and slept in later were more intelligent, but it definitely didn't mention less sleep. Besides didn't a recent study show laziness was a sign of intelligence?

[3boys3dogshelp]

Sounds like she isn't thinking straight in her sleep deprived state.
My sil and I used to say this to each other to cheer ourselves up when we both had shit sleepers, didn't say it to sil2 who had an angel baby who slept through from about 4 minutes old.

[Morphene]

I'm pretty sure the non-sleepers get more advanced at an early age, simply because they have been awake longer. The one real non-sleeper I know is seems to be about a year ahead, and behaves like a 3.5 yo though she is 2.5. I think that is representative of the fact she has been awake 16/17 odd hours a day everyday instead of 10/11......

I doubt any of this has anything to do with intelligence though. The age at which toddler milestones get hit doesn't seem to be hugely defining in adult intelligence.

[MillionToOneChances]

On the gifted children boards there does seem to be a higher than average incidence of crappy sleepers. My kids are both v bright though (borderline gifted, maybe) and have both always slept very well indeed.

I suspect, like others, that your friend is desperately scraping round looking for a silver lining in the cloud of exhaustion. Don't shatter her illusions

[cantmakeme]

Early walking isn't a sign of high intelligence anyway.

[38cody]

I have 4 children - 2 sleep with ease, 2 are struggling sleepers. My 2 most able (One bright, one gifted) are those who sleep with ease. My dyslexic girl struggles to sleep and my little one is about average in academic ability but a nightmare sleeper.
So, in my experience, the opposite is true.

[sj257]

I've had a good sleeper and a bad sleeper, both intelligent

[Tat5tess]

Also, maybe the sleep deprivation turns the caregiver into such a gibbering idiot that even the likes of Boris Johnson/ said colleague' DC seems like a genius??

[Tat5tess]

I'm with tronalddump. It's a bit like when a bird shits on you and some helpful fuckwit tells you it's good luck. My DD didn't sleep through til she was 3. when she slept through she would wake up FOR THE DAY at 4.30am. that was before Netflix exsisted. It's a special kind of madness, willing Cbeebes to start. By 10am it felt like bedtime. My DD now aged 7 is a lot of things - child genius is not one of them

[Masketti]

Actually research shows better sleep = better executive functioning in the brain. So not sure what research she's been reading.

That said my non sleeping 4 year old is definitely more advanced than my sleeping 18 month old but in different ways not globally across all development areas.

[DeadMorose]

My bit of anecdata: DD just turned 2. Talks a lot, counts to 10 easily, right now is learning counting to 20. Knows 10 colours, some main shapes. Recognises all the numbers and some letters.
She sleeps through the night and has done since about 6 weeks old (BF till 16 months).
I can't stop thinking about her what's the catch, there must be a catch

Your colleague is wrong. So fuck her smug face. Cunt.

[KERALA1]

I had heard that only bright people get insomnia. Which kind of makes sense - mind is racing etc. Dont think the reverse is true though!

[agedknees]

dd was a really good sleeper at a young age.

Unfortunately she went to a good university, got a good law degree and has a good job.

Kind of disproves your stupid friends jibes.

Ignore her, she's probably jealous you get to sleep.

[adamharriet]

Nonsense. She was just being a cock.

[Whatsername17]

My dd is 5, top of her year group in the ridiculous tests they give to 5yo kids (dh teaches at her school) and sleeps 7pm-9am on a weekend. She was a nightmare baby- colic and didn't sleep through until she was 2.5. Maybe that's when she developed her genius? Or maybe kids develop at different rates and it will all even out as she gets older? Your friend is an idiot. I really wouldn't worry.

[BrieAndChilli]

I don't think it's meant when they are babies - more that older children and adults who need very little sleep are generally very intelligent. DS1 is very intelligent and can survive on only a couple of hours sleep and would stay up all night reading if we let him.
On the other hand I was very intelligent (joined Mensa/skipped a year in school type of intelligent) and I would sleep 20 hours a day if I could (may have something to do with having 3kids!!)

[phoeb3]

Well if I'd only had my first I would've said true but second two excellent sleepers & just as intelligent now.
First walked talked etc much faster. I think he thought sleeping was boring & he was missing out on something
Don't more successful people get up early? Sure I read that somewhere.

[Doglikeafox]

I'm not sure about sleepers R.E night time, but I currently have 5 two and a half year olds on my books (I'm a childminder, and don't have all five at the same time obvs) and 2 of them do not nap during the day anymore and are average, 2 nap for 1-2 hours a day and are very bright, and the third still naps for 3 hours a day, and sleeps 12 hours at night and is a little genius
All five children are born within a three month time period too.

[JenniferYellowHatsRedLingerie]

I'm really bloody bright and I've always loved my sleep, since teeny tiny. Slept 16 hours the first night, seemingly.
DH is an actual genius, and has always loved his sleep. His dad swears he slept solidly for 3 days when a baby. Can still sleep 12-14 hours solid now.
DD is 5 and as bright as anything. We'd bloody hope so. The child never slept thru till 2.9, survives on 2 hours together over about 9 hours, usually culminating in me screaming at her at 3.42am 'I don't care if your eyes won't close, mine bloody are!' while DH slumbers regardless.
I, however, can't remember where I left my shoes as I've not slept a full night in 6 years. Intelligence sappers indeed, these children.

[SoTheySentMeA]

My 20 month old DS is a poor sleeper so I look for to his genius showing itself any time now. DSD (age 10) slept like a log as a baby, distinctly average mostly, bit advanced in her reading.

I'd be amazed if there was any truth to this at all. Comparing babies is bollocks too, none of it usually matters in the long run. Your friend may be exhausted and possibly over sensitive to comments from you about your DD's sleep so might have sniped "back" in her view.

My DSis has compared babies continually since her DD was born last August. I hate it, it's very tiresome. My beautiful niece is displaying genius tendencies every day and sleeping through like an angel. Yawn.

[Cozytoesandtoast00]

Of course it's true. That was how I consoled myself having had no sleep for the first 4 months of my daughters life!
Let her believe. I remember feeling so envious of the sleeping babies