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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that Dementia/Alzheimers is a woman's disease.

191 replies

Elendon · 14/11/2016 11:24

Two thirds of those who die from the disease are women. This is an awful statistic. I'm shocked.

www.alzheimers.org.uk/statistics

It costs billions of pounds per year to the NHS and the Carer system. Note: my aunt has alzheimers. Why are women so adversely affected? Surely this has to be corrected as a matter of urgency!

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 14/11/2016 12:20

So what is to be done with women living longer? Perhaps encourage them to take a more active part in life? Rather than retire to obscurity and become a financial and emotional burden in life.

We'all probably all be working until we die anyway.

CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:20

Rather than retire to obscurity and become a financial and emotional burden in life.

Personally, I wouldn't see anyone who was ill as any kind of burden.

MsHooliesCardigan · 14/11/2016 12:20

Sorry to sound so dense but how does dementia actually kill someone? i.e if someone has dementia but just dies in their sleep, is dementia the cause of death?

CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:22

Therecis always a reason for someone dying in their sleep; it's that reason that is recorded as cause of death.

originalusernamefail · 14/11/2016 12:23

People in the end stages of dementia often forget to eat / drink. They can't remember how to walk etc. This makes them susceptible to things like malnutrition, pneumonia, and infection. These are often the cause of death.

Elendon · 14/11/2016 12:24

Funny because it's not all about me and an I'm all right Jack approach.

My mum is very concerned about her sister who is dying of Alzheimers. Why wouldn't she feel that pain? My mother is likely to die within a matter of months instead of suffering for years. She understands the difference. Why can't you? Also she understands the huge amount of money being spent on my Aunt, naturally we want to see her comfortable, but it doesn't work.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 14/11/2016 12:24

'Personally, I wouldn't see anyone who was ill as any kind of burden.'

I don't, either, but I'd see myself in that way.

Elendon · 14/11/2016 12:26

With dementia the brain functions less on the organs it needs to support, so gradually these organs fail. Those who can't eat, speak, or walk have expensive carer support. Rightly so.

This takes years.

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Shiningexample · 14/11/2016 12:27

My understanding is that blood flow to the brain is important, so taking good care of your cardiovascular system will reduce the risks

Elendon · 14/11/2016 12:30

Actually, on the basis of this, I've set up a savings account for a trip to Switzerland, should I ever be affected. No way am I going to be doubly incontinent and pumped with antibiotics every few months because of failing organs. It's very distressing, because every now and then those suffering are lucid and engaging. Such a horrible disease.

OP posts:
CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:32

Shining, I would imagine that would be more the case with vascular dementia.

londonrach · 14/11/2016 12:33

Woman live longer so more will get it but both men and woman get this horrible horrible disease. The last stage breaks my heart. Hoping they find a cure asap.

expatinscotland · 14/11/2016 12:34

'Actually, on the basis of this, I've set up a savings account for a trip to Switzerland, should I ever be affected. No way am I going to be doubly incontinent and pumped with antibiotics every few months because of failing organs. It's very distressing, because every now and then those suffering are lucid and engaging. Such a horrible disease.'

I think this is a very good idea. We will all die, no matter how we look after ourselves, it is an inevitability. Best to look to having some control over that rather than trying to avoid every disease there is.

A lot of people have a subconscious belief that good behaviour in life is rewarded. Look after yourself, avoid dementia, cancer, etc. It doesn't work like that, much is beyond our control. But hopefully in time we will get more control over the manner of our deaths.

brasty · 14/11/2016 12:39

That research is very interesting. I didn't know that women were at greater risk of alzheimers, unconnected to life expectancy. We don't know what causes alzheimers, so I guess until we know that, we won't know the reasons that women are more likely to get it.

I don't think it is because of diagnosis. Some people may be more likely to get early diagnosis, but everyone I have ever known with alzheimers could eventually not look after themselves, so a diagnosis was inevitable whether they chose to go to the GP or not.

Women and men are more likely to get certain illnesses. Some of this is social i.e. men are more likely to drink too much alcohol. But some is biological.

CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:40

I'd much prefer it if the UK would allow its citizens some control over the timing and manner of their own death. I don't fancy having to take poison on some Swiss industrial estate.

BeautyGoesToBenidorm · 14/11/2016 12:43

I had every intention of making a plan for assisted suicide, when I was going through the genetic testing process for Huntington's disease. The act of putting plans in place gave me back some control, and I had no desire to let my DH and DC watch me decline and die so horribly.

I'm a big supporter of assisted suicide and fully agree that people in the U.K. should be allowed to take control of their own death, in their own resident country.

DoNotBlameMeIVotedRemain · 14/11/2016 12:46

I think it affects old people who are actually still physically fit. That describes more women I think.

CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:47

Hardly fair that taking control over your own destiny in the U.K. mostly involves googling the tallest car parks to jump off.
It's pretty much a basic human right to determine how you'd like to die if you developed one of the multitude of horrible progressive illnesses.

MiaowTheCat · 14/11/2016 12:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Elendon · 14/11/2016 12:48

I would rather it be in my country of residence. Absolutely. It's my funeral plan of choice.

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debbs77 · 14/11/2016 12:49

My maternal grandmother had alzheimers, my maternal grandfather has dementia. My paternal grandfather has alzheimers.

CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:49

We might have to evict the bishops from the HOL first. Fuck knows what they're doing in there in the 21st century.

BeautyGoesToBenidorm · 14/11/2016 12:51

The right to die IS a basic human right, I agree. It's shocking that people aren't afforded the 'luxury' of that right - it's almost as if suicide is still a crime in this country, the way assisted dying is still regarded by some.

Elendon · 14/11/2016 12:52

We spent, rightly, a lot of money in ensuring all humans are born into this world healthy and that mums are healthy too, obviously this doesn't always go to plan. Why can't we expend the same care to those who are leaving this world?

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CockacidalManiac · 14/11/2016 12:54

The hospice movement need to reevaluate their opposition to assisted dying too; I've personally seen hospices turn away too many dying people to believe their assurances about providing adequate pain relief for end of life care.

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