Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2

AIBU?

AIBU to not want dp to come on holiday?

38 replies

WillWorkForMoney · 09/10/2016 17:24

Earlier in the year my nan paid for me, dp and our dc to go on holiday abroad. (She came too) In the lead up to the holiday dp moaned about the location, date, having to save spends up. While we were there he moaned about the fact we couldn't go out exploring much due to nan not being as fit as us (she's 84!) He didn't like sitting next to the pool (preferred the beach which we did 3 out of the 7 days) even though the kids loved the pool and their new inflatables (1st time abroad) Then whinged that we wanted to visit a theme park and wasn't going to come until 30 mins before we left. Then more moaning when home about all of the above.
Nan has very kindly offered to take me and the girls away next year again. Same place. But she doesn't really want dp to come (and I'm not sure if I do tbh)
Would it be unreasonable to go? Baring in mind if he had the choice, he would come. (Can't afford to go away on our own)
Thanks.

OP posts:

Report

Blu · 09/10/2016 18:05

His behaviour was horrible . And yes, why not just do his own thing cheerfully and appreciate the fact that he was on hol?

Very ungrateful and ungracious to your Nan and passive aggressive to you.

Go with your Nan. If you don't take him, can you save more money overall? Like just have one room for you and the girls ? Then maybe (this is terrible thinking on my part, really) your Nan might be more inclined to treat you for some of your spending money.

Definitely don't take him, your Nan doesn't want to after last time, and it's her money. And you shouldn't have to deny your Ds's the chance of a hol just because of your H's horrible attitude.

Report

AyeAmarok · 09/10/2016 18:05

Ungrateful swine.

Go with your nan and your DC and have a lovely time.

Your nan won't be around for ever so as finances are just doable, then go. And have a lovely time!

Don't let him guilt you.

Report

sparechange · 09/10/2016 18:08

Eurgh, does he always expect to get his own way? Even when it goes against the majority decision and/or inconvenience others?

Tell him his behaviour got him uninvited. He can have 1/4 of the spends pot (ie what you would have spent on him) to do something for himself while you are away...

Report

SandyY2K · 09/10/2016 18:13

I can understand why you don't want him there. He was very ungrateful to your Nan.

Report

SheldonsSpot · 09/10/2016 18:13

Tell him he's not invited, and explain in words of one syllable exactly why - because he's a moaning twat and spoiled the holiday for the rest of you.

If he starts banging on about spending money, tell him to take his 'share' of the holiday spends (so a quarter or a fifth of your total spends) to use as he sees fit.

Report

Jinglebellsandv0dka · 09/10/2016 18:15

sand why are you giving him the option?

Report

Cherrysoup · 09/10/2016 18:47

What she said^^ Don't give him an option, just tell him and say why when he asks/moans. What a downer, way to ruin it for all of you. :(

Report

ChuckBiscuits · 09/10/2016 18:49

19 of us went on holidays this year for a fortnight - 7 kids and 12 adults, family and SIL's family and friends.

Not one argument.

Family money belongs to the family. If he is just going to whine then absolutely don't invite him. You are more than entitled to spend some of that money with your child/ren.

Report

Smoogi · 09/10/2016 18:51

Whiney prick. The sooner you offload him the better by the sounds of things.

Report

TurnipCake · 09/10/2016 18:54

Your nan sounds great :)

Go, enjoy the quality time with the family and leave the miserable arse to it

Report

potentialqualms · 09/10/2016 19:05

The thought of spending a whole week on the beach or by the pool doesn't fill me with joy either TBH. However, if someone was kind enough to treat me and my DP and Dc loved the idea, I'd go, do my best to participate and join in in the mornings, take myself off to do my own thing in the afternoon and enjoy being sociable with them all in the evenings.

If I chose to spend an afternoon in my room, I wouldn't be sulking, I'd be enjoying some peace and reading out of the sun. The suggestion that I was sulking would give me the right hump TBH!

He sounds awful though. He's not DC father is he? I can't imagine any father sulking because his DC had been treated to such a lovely holiday.

Report

ToastDemon · 09/10/2016 19:11

Who knows how many more holidays you will be able to have with your lovely nan?
Definitely go without moanychops he was a total ingrate the last time.

Report

sandragreen · 09/10/2016 19:51

He sounds like such a baby.

I agree with PP, why didn't he just go to the beach on his own rather than sit in the room sulking, if it was that important to him? Is he always such a turd?

I would definitely go without him.