To feel I've reached my limit with my job. But don't know what else to do.

[Circuscats]

I used to come on here a fair bit but not so much now ... Anyway, I am 37. I have one DD who is 21. She is at university.

I've done a couple of different jobs but for the last 4 years I've worked in home care. I feel I've reached my absolute limit with it. I spent most of the 4 years working for the same company for £6.70 an hour, obviously this went up April 2015 to £7.20. But it was never £6.70 or £7.20... you get allocated times in quarter of an hour slots so 15 minutes, 30 minutes, 45 minutes or one hour. Most calls were fifteen minutes so to make £6.70 you had to go to 4 different people. No travel time. Anti social hours - up at 5 to be at the first one for 6. Home past 11 at night. Up again early the next day. Weekends, Christmas, baking hot days in a traffic jam and sweaty uniform.

I mean I am saying the worst of it there and don't get me wrong I enjoyed some too otherwise I wouldn't have stayed so long but no doubt it did have an effect on me.

When my bed calls got to 14 people I decided enough was enough, I went to a new agency and this was in June. I really don't like it even though it's better run than the old one. You have to log in and out so you're on less money a lot of the time. Not enough hours either (opposite problem to the old one) and so you have to take what you can get to pay the bills. The people are quite rude too, not all of them but I have four calls in the morning and three are nice and one isn't but I dread it for the one whose rude.

So I'm desperate to do something else, away from care. But I've no ideas at all. I don't think I can retrain. DD has said when she's finished at university she will move in with me for a couple of years and pay the bills so I can refrain but I think that's a big ask of her and I don't feel it's fair to make her commit to that (she's a for offering though, that's something I did right!)

The other thing is I love DD to bits but I have been having these thoughts that maybe I'd love to have another baby. And I need to meet a man so is that possible/practical when being a FT student? And when I finished I'd be 40 which I know isn't totally past it in terms of having a baby but is pushing it.

Oh I don't know, I am just wondering, what would you do, if you were me?

[Circuscats]

Lottie, because you literally are working 24/7. Seven days a week, on call at night, in those linked examples.

Even if you're working as a carer via direct payments, it's incredibly hard because you naturally build up a relationship that is way beyond employer/employee yet at the same time it is. As a result, not only are the clients vulnerable in some cases but so are you.

I was a PA for a disabled lady and things got very difficult as she quite rightly wanted to live her life ... but this involved me directly. So having to go on nights out and she wanted me to have a drink with her but then I had to go home and use a hoist. Thats an example of the sort of blurred lines you get and you can't complain to your boss as they ARE your boss!

[vdbfamily]

If you are considering staying in care work, see if you can get an NHS job. There are lots of community jobs in admission avoidance/intermediate care/hospital at home type teams. Once working for the NHS there is training and career progression etc and you will get a fixed salary which will go up a little bit each year.

[Circuscats]

I can't take on lodgers. It's only a 2 bed place as it is and tbh round here isn't really a 'lodger' place. TA jobs and school secretary jobs have hundreds of applicants, many of them qualified teachers!

Ah well at least DD won't be like me!

[Circuscats]

Tbh V it's better the devil you know ... This is what I found when I changed care companies.

[MewlingQuim]

IME it's quite difficult to change career and increase salary at the same time.

What you need is some kind of sideways step into a career that has better conditions and/or better chance of progression. Maybe you could have a look at admin roles in a healthcare environment? They may not pay more per hour than care but they are likely to be regular mon-Fri 8-6ish hours which means you can study evening classes or OU after work for more formal qualifications. Your previous experience in care will give plenty of transferable skills and knowledge, and once you have some experience and qualifications then you can either look for a better paid job or start saving for uni if that is what you really want to do. If you are set on teaching or SW then try and do some volunteering in that area first, the experience will be valuable if you apply for jobs or you may decide it's not the career for you after all, as I did

[Splandy]

Yes, I know what you mean about it being difficult to find a 9-5 job. My husband has always worked in casinos, pubs, betting shops etc. He is now desperate to stop working evenings and weekends because there will often be many days in a row where he doesn't get to see my eldest for more than ten minutes in the morning and I'm usually alone during the more difficult dinner/bath/bed times. We've been talking and he's just going to go for it. Apply for anything and everything with the right hours, because right now, that is the most important thing. Worry about wages etc once he has managed to get a job that works better around our family. Don't resign yourself to doing a job you clearly hate when you still have so many working years ahead of you! There's no harm in applying and seeing where it gets you, because it will really open up your other options. My sister has just managed to get an office/customer service job with those kind of hours with no similar experience.

[Adnerb95]

Don't try and work out all these different issues at once! Just concentrate on making a future for yourself away from care work. After all, meeting someone is just one of those things that happens when it happens and is more LIKELY to happen when you are happily pursuing some positive career options!
And the baby thing ... Well, you can't force this, can you?

No way are you too old to retrain - I left teaching at the age of 48 and completely retrained - no regrets. Go for it!

If you need part-time work to keep you solvent while you pursue other options, then driving work is good (already mentioned) and usually easily available. Alternatively, take up your daughter on her offer OR get a lodger - tax-free rental income through the Rent-a-Room scheme.

[BlancheBlue]

I don't think I would recommend teaching at the moment. A good friend of mine has just done a PGCE and the amout of people who drop out or drop out in their nqt year is high.

[Adnerb95]

Ah, sorry OP - just saw your comment re lodgers!

[toptoe]

What about this: nationalcareersservice.direct.gov.uk/advice/planning/jobprofiles/Pages/familysupportworker.aspx

[Adnerb95]

Bit left-field, but are you fairly numerate, organised and like helping people?

If so, believe it or not, working as a financial adviser could suit you. It's a people job, contrary to public perception, and can be very rewarding, both personally and financially. You can train and study within an existing financial services company - try Independent Financial advisers in your area. A lot of them are crying out for female advisers and happy to take on trainees!
You should expect at least £9 per hour and it would normally be office hours.

[Circuscats]

There isn't much support work around. Technically my current job is carer/support worker but about 95% of the clients we have are elderly. There are a couple of children on the books and younger people who are adults but have suffered a stroke or similar.

It is difficult because as identified I want to retrain but actually earning money whilst retraining seems to be nigh on impossible!

[imother]

Here's a thought.

If you went to uni you could pay for cheap house share from your student loan (say £250pm) and live extremely frugally on the rest.

And then rent out your house to cover your mortgage and hopefully top up your income a bit too.

That would leave you free to retrain. Your CV would be perfect for nursing or teaching. In nursing you'd be almost guaranteed a job when you were qualified. Plus you can work a few shifts as a Helath Care Assistant while you are training.

[Circuscats]

I couldn't Im

To be honest a cheap house share would only be slightly less than the mortgage though admittedly without the bills, but there's DD to consider and the costs of renting your house out are high as you need things like smoke alarms and electricity checks. Plus I'm approaching 40 - I couldn't, go in a house share for all the tea in China!

[Doyouthinktheysaurus]

The nhs is a much better employer than private care firms, especially those providing home care.

I'm an RMN but Health Care Assistants I've worked with have gone on to work as phlebotomists, assistants in a physio clinic and in as HCA in an outpatient clinic. All 9-5 hours.

For that matter, caring roles in adult or children and young persons mental health are very different to elderly care but if you are interested in social work, may be worth considering in the short term.

[flue]

I had my first DS at 18 as a single mum and I had similar yearnings when he reached adulthood - I felt the urge for a new partner/family and wanted to retrain. For me it ended up that meeting DH came first, which was quite fortunate as he was able to support me while I retrained - I would have had to work nights as well as attending uni if I had been on my own - I did the sums and the amount of money given in loans was impossible to live on even if I switched to student-style living. I got a degree in Maths, but I had a baby after my first year and interrupted my studies for that. It was tough to continue studying after that, but I had to be realistic about my biological clock so we couldn't have waited until I finished my degree. It has worked out pretty well, I got a first and I have a very good job now.

Most unis will want to see evidence of recent study even if you have A levels, if they are from years ago, so it's worth considering an Access course, but that will add an extra year before getting qualified. If you are thinking about teaching, subjects like Physics, Maths and Languages have good bursaries right now (although it's not guaranteed they'd be on offer by the time you start a PGCE).

[Circuscats]

Here the NHS has no involvement in home care it's all outsourced to agencies. And I definitely don't want to work in a hospital, I think it's quite competitive anyway.

[fruitatthebottom]

But you don't have to carry on with that care work though.. get a job in a hospital, better shifts, better money, a pension.. or care work within a GP surgery or with a district nurse team. These are all better options than the work you are doing at the moment. Give it a try and if you still don't enjoy it then you can consider other options outside care at that time.

[CodyKing]

OP you seem rather negative to all the suggestions

Carry on and nothing will change - you'll just drift

Unfortunately care work isn't going to put you in the path of a suitable male!!!

Think of it as a two way prong!

[lamprey42]

getintoteaching.education.gov.uk/explore-my-options/teacher-training-routes/school-led-training this has lots of information about teacher training. You can do it school led but would need a degree first - I haven't looked into it but I think you could probably do this via open university.

[cansu]

Have you thought about getting your own clients? I have two dc with asd and have been amazed at how difficult it is to find carers I can pay my direct payments to even when offering around ten pounds an hour.

[imother]

There are mature students I know who do this, which is why I suggested it. You might be surprised to know that in my uni over half of nursing students are mature and some do house shares together while renting out their own places to help finance their training.

The costs of renting out don't need to be huge. A smoke alarm is a fiver and you only need an electricity safety cert, about £100 afaik.

You could try to get a big room so dd could stay with you. Rentals to nurses are usually 12month, because their courses are. Anyway I bet dd would rather share a room with you, than see you stuck in a job you don't want.

Plus you might meet a lovely doc to have your baby with

[imother]

Sorry, that should be you only need a gas safety cert - the elec one is only recommended.