What's the weirdest house rule you've ever experienced as a house guest?

[Creativemode]

Just that really.

Mine is someone that wouldn't let me flush the toilet incase it woke their children.

Also another wouldn't let me go upstairs to the toilet incase the stairs creaked and woke their children (there was no downstairs toilet).

I had a school friend that wasn't allowed fish and chips in the house because of the smell.

[WitchesGlove]

Not as a guest but I had awful flatmates once; one was was bossy and domineering and acted like it was her house.

You weren't allowed to waste electricity, especially light bulbs, only allowed a ten minute shower, not allowed to cook things that took a long time, not allowed heating on

[GreenShadow]

Personally I don't tend to flush at night as it can disturb people - adults more likely than children and am always torn as to the best policy when staying with other people. I hate to be woken up at night as I can takes ages to get back to sleep (2 hours plus sometimes) so you can understand the dilemma.

[listsandbudgets]

Parents of one of DD's friends NO jaffa cakes - literally no jaffa cakes allowed in the house. All other biscuits and snacks fine. Stuff haribo down the kids throats, fill them with cake let them gorge on crisps but whatever you do NO JAFFACAKES.

[problembottom]

My friend just told me a great story - her son's just started school and got invited to a party. A kid spilled something in the lounge when the host wasn't about so my friend went to find some kitchen roll/a cloth to be helpful. Host mum appears in the kitchen and goes nuts at her saying guests are NOT allowed in there. Ok then...

[MyBreadIsEggy]

Dh's aunt is annoyingly precious about certain words around her DC's.
Before I met her, I thought "poo" and "bum" were quite inoffensive, child-friendly words for releasing one's bowels and to describe where said bowel movement comes from.....apparently not
My Dd (about 6mo at the time) filled her nappy while we were there and DH said something along the lines of "Oh no, that's definitely a poo!", and was met with a look of fury from his aunt: "Not in front of the children MrEggy!" Apparently her toddlers have to say that they need to "leave a message" instead of do a poo
It's most bizarre.

[JellyBelli]

God you'd fucking love it at our house, we had popcorn and beer at 1am to celebrate the end of a shit day

[Hmmnotkeen]

On my first ever sleepover as a child I ended up wetting myself for the first time in years because it was impressed on me by the parents that I wasnt to flush. I was terrified because my parents had told me that it was rude not to flush so I didn't know what to do. Her mum was really horrible about it as well.

BIL has a stack of antibacterial wipes and those chewy toothbrush things by the front door. If he knows you've eaten meat you are to wipe your hands and face and brush your teeth before entering the house. When we went on holiday with PILs family he kicked off that people weren't intending on going fully veggie for the week!

[PigletJohn]

If anyone ever cares about it, there are simple plumbing items to make the flush and the refill of cistern and loft tank quiet.

[BorpBorpBorp]

at 'leave a message'

[80sWaistcoat]

Travelled half way round the world to visit brother and his girlfriend and their kids. We had to be out of the house by 10.30 and not back till 5 - it was like an old fashioned B&B. Brother getting quite twitchy when it was 10.25 and we were still sipping a cup of tea....it was her rules, not his....

[CandODad]

My Grans house - No number two in the upstairs loo (totally modern plumbing) you had to do number twos in the outdoor loo no matter what the time of day.

Oh, and she only bought Izal paper because it was "better" for your bum?

[LemonBreeland]

A friend of mine stopped phoning one of her friends as she was so fussy about timings and waking the baby. I think she is over it now he is 11.

[maddiemookins16mum]

Friend's house as a child. Before eating each person round the table had to sing a line of a prayer (grace). I dreaded it but loved going there because we had hedgehog pie for dinner (root veg mash with sausages poking out plus pudding was Heinz tinned chocolate steamed pudding).

[MrsCaecilius]

To hit the sofa with a golf club before you sit down.

(Grandparents in Africa; big spiders....)

[TwigletsMakeMeViolent]

Ooh I don't think I thought I cared about that until now, PigletJohn! What are these items?

My friend was an au pair and stayed with a bonkers family who insisted she wiped down the shower with a towel after every use. The mum would go and check when she came out bathroom. She didn't last long in that job!

[YoungGirlGrowingOld]

Eggy we have friends who don't/won't say poo either. Their son "does his homework"....

[1frenchfoodie]

I lived in a houseshare where one guy insisted we each had our own loo roll so if you had a guest you'd need to tell them to get your roll from the cupboard next to the loo. In the end the 3 other housemates and I said we'd treat him to toilet roll and have just one roll on the go at a time.

[ProseccoBitch]

When I was a kid I dreaded going round to the house of the girl next door. She was older than me and I wasn't that keen on her but we were one of three houses with nothing else for several miles in each direction so our parents decided we must be friends. Her parents terrified me.

You weren't allowed to take drinks anywhere that was carpeted, which restricted you to the kitchen, utility or hall, so you couldn't have a drink while watching TV or in her room. I once blatantly flouted this and walked into the sitting room only to fall over and spill a glass of coke everywhere. Her Mum made me SUCK THE COKE OUT OF THE CARPET WITH A STRAW. I can barely bring myself to think about it even now.

You had to eat everything that was put in front of you. Fair enough, my parents were of the 'you don't get pudding if you haven't eaten your all your dinner' type so I got that. But once her Mum asked me if I wanted some home made raspberry ripple ice cream, yes please I said I love raspberry ripple ice cream. She kept asking if I was sure as it was home made, I was about seven and didn't really get what the issue was. Until I tasted it. It was AWFUL, it wasn't even sweetened. I spat it straight back into the bowl, honestly I would never usually have done that but I physically couldn't swallow it. She said well I did warn you it was homa made, then said I couldn't go home until I finished it. I sat in that kitchen over that bowl for over an hour before my Mum (who was also terrified of her) eventually plucked up the courage to come round and see why I hadn't come home when I was supposed to. She tore a strip off my Mum and I never went back.

[StStrattersOfMN]

Eggy my DMIL was the same, we used to get cryptic messages back that 'DD's tummy had worked' when she looked after her, or she had 'done a doni'. Bizarre.

[JudyCoolibar]

Friend had lodgings once with all sorts of weird and wonderful rules. They were supposed to take shoes off in the hall and put them in a shoe rack so that they were all lined up neatly with any laces stored inside the shoes. The internet went off at 11 p.m. They had assigned days for washing, and weren't allowed to dry in their rooms, but the indoor hanging space for days when it was raining was completely inadequate. If they cooked in the kitchen, landlady hung around and pestered them to wash up all the cooking implements and clean the top of the stove etc before they were allowed to eat (so most of them ended up miserably having salads and sandwiches in their rooms or sneaking up takeaways). The worst was that they had to stand on newspapers in the bathroom, their feet weren't allowed to touch the floor: the landlady kept a stash of them which the lodgers were expected to change regularly.

Friend left after three weeks, she was dreading going back there in the evenings. Landlady was most surprised, and said she'd never had anyone leave that quickly before. Which sort of implied that most people did leave quickly, but landlady never made the connection.

[CocktailQueen]

Their son "does his homework" - for having a poo?? What happens when he actually has to do his homework?? Doesn't that cause confusion?

And at 'leave a message' - how confusing for the dc!!

[StVincent]

Bring your own drinks.

Admittedly it was only for the neighbours (I presumed) but still! Toddling round there with a glass of coke or even a bottle of water! Felt totally ridiculous. Even more so when they cooked us dinner but the drink rule still held.

[Creativemode]

That's horrific prosecco

[JudyCoolibar]

Apparently her toddlers have to say that they need to "leave a message" instead of do a poo

I hate to think what happens when they go to school and get asked to take a message to another classroom ...

[BorpBorpBorp]

I still can't get over 'leaving a message' What did they think their toddler was trying to tell them??