To think it is rude of shop assistants to say ...

[rosiecam]

... to say "Thank you for waiting" in a loud voice to next customer when previous customer who has been slow for whatever reason is still very obviously within hearing?

To me it means "I'm annoyed with you for holding up the queue, and I want you to know it, but I'm not allowed to say it, so I'll pretend I'm being polite to the next customer"

[PinkissimoAndPearls]

I am one of those people who is slow at check outs, sadly.

I don't find it rude when the retail staff say "thanks for waiting" to people behind me - what I do find rude, and much much more frequent, is the person behind me tutting, sighing or making comments like "I am on my lunch hour please can you hurry". (Ironically the worst offenders are in Waitrose ).

I do have problems with my mobility and fingers and sometimes apologise to the people behind me if I have a few items to pack or struggle to get things out of my purse. Some of the time people are lovely but other times they are so rude and impatient. The most I hold people up by is maybe 30 seconds to two minutes and they can overtake me on the way out and it makes me sad those 30 seconds are so precious to them, but they don't realise this is my life 24/7.

If someone feels angry they have to wait for a minute and tuts or huffs and sighs, they get to walk away afterwards and the minute is done, but I feel shit about it for a few hours afterwards.

It's not retail staff that are the problem, it's other bloody shoppers.

[blitheringbuzzards1234]

There are a few things that shop assistants get away with today that would have got at least a telling off years ago. I suppose the volume of the voice represents the amount of annoyance they feel at the previous customer.

[Rachel0Greep]

I can't for the life of me see why that would be considered rude. I always say 'not at all' if it's said to me. I can see that the shop is busy and the assistants are doing their utmost to get everyone served.

I did work in a public facing role for a long number of years. Not sure if that makes any difference.

[hormental]

I have a friend who gets really annoyed when retail staff say" sorry for your wait" as she thinks they only say it to fat people and they actually mean " sorry for your weight"

[Kungfupandaworksout16]

I work in a hair salon and I'll say that phrase, it's my way of letting them I have noticed them and sorry I ran a bit late. Im not making an attack on the previous customer or the person I say it too.

[Goingtobeawesome]

If shoppers don't want it said to them the head office should not make their staff say it.

[TSSDNCOP]

Ex retail here, I still give thanks every Saturday that I don't have to make inane conversation with miserable fucktards.

As others have said, 99% of people are sweet and polite and not only "get" that we are doing our jobs, but lots actually enjoy the interaction.

But I've seen grown women reduce 16 year olds to puddles of humiliation for not being fast/thrilled/polite/grateful enough for their custom. It's riseable to watch and like all bullys they back down fast enough when older assistants hove into view.

As a flagship store we were often visited on weekends by head office staff shopping with their friends or family that liked nothing more for someone to be 30 seconds too slow with a greeting or smile. You could bet that they'd make sure our regional manager or MD knew about it first thing Monday. One actually skulked in avoiding all the staff once until she got to the till and could make herself known and complain no one had been able to reach her to greet her without hurdling several racks.

Just remember when you're being a walker and the assistant is still managing to be charming, she's secretly hoping your central heating breaks down on Christmas Eve.

[Aworldofmyown]

going you need to complain to head office. They don't believe lowly shop assistants when we tell them!!

[PinkissimoAndPearls]

TSSDNCOP Are you aware that "fucktard" is a contraction of "fucking retard"? It's a horribly offensive word.

[CigarsofthePharoahs]

Ex retail and my MH is still recovering.
We used to have a list of speech bubbles at the till of all the inane crap we HAD to say.
It didn't matter if I got it all right with a stupid smile on my face, people still found reason to complain.
So glad I'm out. The wolf would have to be in the door and admiring the hall carpet before I'd go back. I'd rather work for Amazon.

[dodobookends]

We have to have spoken to the customer within 10 seconds of them entering the door
Really? I wonder whether there ever been any research to find out if customers actually want to be pounced on before they've barely had time to draw breath!!
I suppose if it is the sort of shop where you are served at the counter (like a butcher's) then you wouldn't want to stand there twiddling your thumbs while the assistant ignored you, but any other type of shop? No. Being pestered the instant I walk in puts me right off.

[ninnypoo]

I used to work in Waitrose. I was told it's a way of effectively saying 'sorry the queues are a bit long' but without putting negative phrasing in the customer's mind. Never meant to be a passive aggressive dig!

[puglife15]

WTAF?

So what you're saying is, when someone has had to wait a long time to be served, it is rude of the assistant to say thank you for waiting?

Fucking hell. They don't have a chance do they.

Personally I'm grateful when they acknowledge I've been waiting for a while and it often diffuses the tension I may have been feeling about being held up while someone dicks around trying to get a refund without a receipt.

Btw they say thank your for waiting rather than sorry about the wait as it is much more positive and makes you go "oh yeah I'm so gracious for waiting" rather than "yeah you should be sorry".

[TheFormidableMrsC]

In my experience, it is absolutely the norm for the checkout person to say "thank you for waiting". I always respond with a smile and "no problem". Why wouldn't you? To be frank, retail staff can't do right for doing wrong and how the general public treat them is an utter disgrace. Going slightly off track here, but so totally pissed off about it...my 17 yo daughter works for a London based very well known, luxury brand cosmetic company as a make up artist. She was taken on at such a young age because she has an obvious and natural talent. She was recently hauled over the coals by HR because she had followed procedure in terms of a customer taking the piss outside of DD's allotted appointment schedules. The nasty nasty cow decided to tweet about DD and complain about her even though DD did her utmost to do what she could within the rules they are expected to follow. The bloody woman even acknowledged how young she was. Because Twitter is so public, DD was expected to explain. She had the full support of her manager and other staff yet was still put through that horrendous stress because of a nasty piece of work who expected to get something for nothing. I was raging and still am. Retail staff have so many rules and regulations to follow, never mind individual company policies that it is a wonder anybody actually does the job. It really is.

I think it's really important to remember that when you are having a moan about them. Calms down, pours wine

[raspberrysuicide]

I used to work for Asda and refused to say it

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es]

I like it, acknowledges the fsct that you had to wait and for me it does quell any irritation tgat might have been building up. I have no issue with people who are slow because of limited dexterity or similar, but sometimes when people faff about, chat away to the cashier instead of getting their money out, send their partner back to get something extra at the last minute my blood pressure does start to rise.

I'm happy with "how are you" etc too, I'd far rather have that than silence, you can go to the automated tills if you want to avoid it.

I'm also to be asked whether clothes were any good when I come out of a changing room, so I can say no thanks and hand them over, it does seem rude to be greeted by silence.

[Bigfatnope]

Work in retail, we get told we must say it if there is more than 3 people in queue

[mirime]

Dodobookends - just an anecdote, but I worked in a department store and we were supposed to make eye contact with and greet each customer as they entered our department. We never really bothered, until one day we were having a visit, probably the regional manager, and we had to do everything by the book. It was hilarious - if a customer had seen a previous customer being greeted they would take evasive action to avoid us.

In my experience as someone who has seen both sides people just want to be left alone to browse, and for there to be a member of staff reasonably near in case they need help.

[Bigfatnope]

Mirimi- ah i hate when staff come up to you in clothes shops and ask if your ok. I know its our job and dont mind but i just want to be left in peace!

[limitedperiodonly]

It's just fucking weird that people don't want to acknowledge other people.

I fling greetings about with gay abandon. I often tell complete strangers their babies are beautiful even if I think they look like trolls. They always seem delighted. It is called making the world go round.

When I walk into a shop I say hello to the first staff member I see. In some shops that is the security man on the door. They are sometimes taken by surprise at my boldness, which makes me wonder how good they are at security. No matter. When I leave, I say goodbye and so do they. Sometimes grudgingly, but I see it as unofficial training for which I will make no charge.

Once inside. I fling nods and smiles about with gay abandon. I expect retail staff to ask if I want help and am not startled at their approach since I presumably want to buy something what with being in their shop. Sometimes I say I do and sometimes I say I'm just looking. If, after looking at things I decide to ask them something, I expect them to say yes or no or 'I'll go and find out' rather than stare at me like I am a deviant.

When paying I also talk. This week in Zara I asked what their returns policy was. I threw in the irrelevant information that I was starting a new job and needed some smart clothes sharpish but didn't have time to try things on.

The woman at the checkout said it was 28 days, agreed it was better to try things on at home and wished me well in my new job. I complimented her on her tattoo and she thanked me.

This is all normal behaviour. I do not ignore people working in shops and I do not expect to be ignored by them.

[Sn0tnose]

What I do think is rude/uncomfortable is, "So what have you been up to today?" or, "What are you up to the rest of today?" "Err...what the bloody fuck has it got to do with you?" is what I want to reply. I now they get told to say it/make conversation but I find it intrusive and awkward...we are bound by politeness and social convention to provide an answer. I know the 21 yr old check out lad in Tesco doesn't give a flying fuck about me taking my kids to Cubs and Brownies later so why does he ask? Awful...just awful.

You're quite right Pictish. He probably doesn't give a shit. He's probably scanning your shopping wishing that you'd just take 30 seconds to ask yourself whether he really has any interest in what you get up to during your day, or whether he's doing it because he gets moaned at by his managers if he doesn't try and make pointless conversation with complete strangers.

Perhaps he's even hoping that you'll realise that Head Offices in supermarket chains don't tend to consult checkout staff when deciding on compulsory policies on how to deal with customers and that instead of responding to him in a manner that kills just a little bit more of his soul off each day, you'll treat him like a human being and take it up with Head Office instead.

I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but when your loved ones are coming home feeling sick at the thought of going to work the next day because they've had a day dealing with rude, aggressive bastards, it colours your attitude somewhat.

[diddl]

A lot of what shop assistants are told to say just seems daft to me.

"Thank you for waiting"

Well really, it's either that or not waiting!

[WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat]

I have terrible anxiety and being in shops exacerbates it. I struggle sometimes to make any conversation but understand that while I may loathe it, the staff are only doing their jobs, and I do my utmost to respond as appropriately and pleasantly as possible, even if it is causing my hands to shake and me to have palpitations sometimes.

[diddl]

"If shoppers don't want it said to them the head office should not make their staff say it"

I agree.

I wonder who thought this up & who the research was done on!

Sometimes I want to chat, sometimes I don't & I think it's terrible that staff "have to" & therefore so do I!

I'm happy to smile & say hello, but sometimes that's enough!

[kali110]

So glad i don't work in retail anymore.
Shop assistants can't win can they?
Don't make conversation, moan, they talk, moan!
We had to say 'thankyou for waiting' 'sorry for the wait' 'how are you'.
If we didn't we would be in trouble.
If we were mystery shopped and weren't doing it, even more trouble.
We had to follow rules set out by bosses.( even if they then went back on them).
I was shouted at, humiliated and sworn at during my retail years.
It may annoy you having to hear it, but it's not like the staff have any choice.