Baby left in car

[MooPointCowsOpinion]

On my way back to our car, My husband noticed a baby in the car parked next to ours. Alone, two front windows were slightly open, he looked about 12 months. We fretted a bit, stayed sat next to him waiting for 10 minutes and no-one came. So I called the police on 101, and they immediately put me through to 999.

The woman arrived back at her car a minute before the police did. I told her I'd called the police, and she couldn't leave her baby like that. She cried and said she was having a shit day and needed to get the item she' bought (big and bulky box, maybe a buggy?) to the car. I hugged her, cried with her, and said I understood but she still can't do that, and then directed the police to her and left.

Was I being a busy body? AIBU to think it's illegal to do that?

[hazeimcgee]

How many shops were there tho? If its abything like my local MC there's a coffee shopp, several kids shops, tons of clothes shops...

And then if there is just one and no one comes out cos now they're embarassed?

She saw a child at risk and reported it. Simple and correct

[BusyMummy55]

I have a 2 yo and 4.5 yo and on a couple of occasions have left them in the car for 5-10min, though never on a warm day and always right by the entrance to the shop. I am on my own with the kids during the working hours and sometimes I have to pop in to pick something up and I believe it is less distressing for the kids to let them sleep in the car rather than wake them up and then drag them half awake (usually upset by that point) to the shop.

I understand the concerns, but I think calling the police is a bit much, a non-incriminating announcement at the shop would have been made my course of action after waiting for the parent for 5min.

[hazeimcgee]

extrahot so how long wwoukd you have waited? You gonna stand there for 2 hrs watching ovee the car til the mom comes back and then calmly walk away?

Op had no way of knowing how long the baby had been there, what would happen next (baby vomitting etc) or how long the parebt would be. Mom could have got into an altercation in the shop, she could have slipped and knocked herself out. No one would think to check thr car park for a baby!!
Yes its all unlikely but then i guess it depends what ofds you like to play with over a baby's life!

[dizzyfeck]

So, one deliberate murder later and we still have no accidental deaths in the UK from a child being left in the car & over heating.

Only problem with that is that the deliberate murder case you're thinking of was in the USA. The UK one was in 1999 and was a very real case of accidental death were the car was parked in the shade and in tune with so many of these cases abroad, not in the view of any adults who could have averted the tragedy.

[Canyouforgiveher]

As I said earlier, I'd have waited to see if someone returned to the car, but that would have been my decision, I would not have felt 'put upon' by the mother at all.

Yes. and so would nearly every other poster on here. They see the baby, they don't know how long it has been left in the car, they wait by the car. Why? Because they are concerned that the child has been forgotten/will be left too long which will result in discomfort and possible heat stroke. If you stopped by the car is would be because you recognise the risk involved in a baby being left unattended in a car on a warm day. You would not reassure yourself with the statistics on deaths in the UK. You would see the risk and respond accordingly.

And surely any decision which involves complete strangers being highly likely to stop what they are doing and wait by your car is not a particularly good decision?

[ayeokthen]

Maybe no babies have died in hot cars because people like op do something about it? (Yes I am playing Devil's Advocate). I think it's all relative personally, there is a massive difference between somebody popping to pay for fuel in full view of the car, and somebody doing a weekly shop leaving babies in a car.

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

canyouforgiveher

I've already said what I'd do.

My point is that all of the handwringing over babies dying in cars due to heat in the UK is OTT.

Parents raise kids to adulthood in the UK quite well without the state or general publics interference. This mother assessed it to be safe. It was safe. Total non event until other people interfered.

As I said earlier, I'd have waited to see if someone returned to the car, but that would have been my decision, I would not have felt 'put upon' by the mother at all. I'd have seen the mother come back to the car, realised there was absolutely nothing wrong with her risk assessment and got on with my day.

[Canyouforgiveher]

So, one deliberate murder later and we still have no accidental deaths in the UK from a child being left in the car & over heating.

Great. So if you happen to pass a car on a warm summer day and spot a baby in the back unattended, you'll happily go on your way, won't wait by the car, won't call anyone because you know for a fact that babies don't overheat in cars in the UK, despite it happening elsewhere. And you won't even wonder for a moment "is that baby ok? what if the father or mother forgot him".

Is that what you'd do - because no baby has died in a car in the UK? A triumph of belief in statistics over normal common sense.

[LellyMcKelly]

Of course you did the right thing. Who in their right mind leaves a baby in a car? Apart from the heat, they could be abducted. So what if her day was shitty. It could have been a whole lot shittier.

[Brandonstarkflakes]

[JassyRadlett]

Well, you have rather contradicted yourself about 'risk' there haven't you? If the parent did get run over by a bus and they had decided to take the child with them, then actually it would been much better for the baby to have been left in the car where they wouldn't have got run over by a bus!!!

Except the parent might not have taken the risk of rushing through moving traffic if they hadn't felt the need to return to baby-in-car as quickly as possible, and therefore taking the baby might have prevented the accident.

We could play this game for hours.

[Brandonstarkflakes]

No parent "has the knowledge that they are only going for 5 minutes". Delays in picking up parcel, queues in shop, illness, Getting run over by a bus are all factors which create the risk. Whether the risk is high or low, there is still an element of risk. And the stakes of losing a baby because of it are too high.

Well, you have rather contradicted yourself about 'risk' there haven't you? If the parent did get run over by a bus and they had decided to take the child with them, then actually it would been much better for the baby to have been left in the car where they wouldn't have got run over by a bus!!!

On an average day in the UK a child isnt going to come to any harm being left in a car for a few minutes.

[Billionnairewannabe]

"t's not the same as a parent who has the knowledge that they are only going for 5 minutes and it's significantly advantageous to do so vs taking the baby."

No parent "has the knowledge that they are only going for 5 minutes". Delays in picking up parcel, queues in shop, illness, Getting run over by a bus are all factors which create the risk. Whether the risk is high or low, there is still an element of risk. And the stakes of losing a baby because of it are too high.

[ExtraHotLatteToGo]

Jack if you read the tread there has only been one very old case found in the UK, so loads of babies don't / won't die here

Yes and the sick fuck did it on purpose. He researched it and researched other ways to kill children and how much time inside he'd get 'inside' for various things.

Then he picked a hot day and left the child in the car for HOURS. 6 hours if my memory serves me right. He set out to kill the child. He didn't pop into a shop for 10 mins to collect a parcel.

So, one deliberate murder later and we still have no accidental deaths in the UK from a child being left in the car & over heating.

[FRoyal]

Strap your baby to you in a sling!!! I have a 6month old and a 2 year old and like many of you, you just have to cope with either not doing nothing that shopping trip...order online or just do without. No point in putting on the water works when you get caught. No sympathy here.

[Flashbangandgone]

You don't leave babies in cars. Ever. For any reason.

Not this again... Well, I did when I paid for petrol (out of the sun and not on a hot day) because I judged that to be safer than traipsing across the forecourt with them. I don't believe I'm a bad parent for doing so, and I don't much like that you are insinuating that I am.

[Flashbangandgone]

i wouldn't have waited ten minutes, leaving child in car is dangerous from heat perspective, but also from an abduction pov. Plus it isn't easy to smash a car window

Surely a bit of common sense would apply before smashing a window. If it was a sweltering sunny day and the windows weren't open, then yes.... If it was quite warm but cloudy and the car had windows open then no.

[Blu]

Even if the temperature is cool - who leaves their baby unattended in a public place for 15 mins and more??

[YouAreMyRain]

Was it sunny? What was the temperature?

[Daisygarden]

In some cases, people who leave kids in cars could be risk-takers/neglectful in other ways too. It's like the police pick up people not wearing their seatbelts, and whilst they're there, they check the car for insurance, tax, links to criminal activity, check the driver for past offences... not following the rules sometimes goes hand in hand with not following other rules.

Again. WHAT IF the mother hadn't come back after 10 minutes? What if she had intended to leave the child for an hour? What if she'd forgotten the child? What if she had had an accident and wasn't going to be back to collect the child or car any time soon? NONE of these posters defending the mum's actions could know this wasn't the case. Neither could OP. That is why she did the right thing.

If nobody called the police, that child could have (potentially for all anyone knew at the time) been left there for hours and hours.

[Oakmaiden]

In Israel? And this is relevant, how?

[newshiny]

In Israel, there's a case of a baby being left in a car and overeating with reasonable frequency. It usually makes the news when it ends in tragedy. You totally did the right thing, calling the police.

[TiredConfusedMumma]

FreedomIsInPeril are you serious??? She made her day shittier?? It's pretty bloody simple. You don't leave babies in cars. Ever. For any reason. Especially to go any buy something as unnecessary as that....
Don't try & make this OP feel bad for doing something that 99% of mums and the general population would have done and 100% of people SHOULD have done.

[tigercub50]

Sorry meant this to be on a new thread lol

[tigercub50]

I booked my DD into a kids club at our local leisure centre, which is very reasonably priced & sounds good. However, quite shocked to hear that the packed lunch offered is a sandwich, crisps & a chocolate bar. If they are supposed to be promoting health, you would think there would be some fruit or at least a yogurt