To pull out of our house purchase last minute - WWYD?

[TheVeryHungryDieter]

We've been trying to buy a new house for nearly a year. It's taken so long because there were a series of delays. First we tried to buy it while we rent our flat out - but the mortgage valuations came back seriously low (on the new house) so we couldn't get finance necessary to buy it. So we needed to sell ours and that's been a problem- we were already on the market for ages without an offer, then the first buyer pulled out after a couple of months and the second one has taken ages to get in gear, but it finally looks like we will be ready to exchange by the end of this week.

Throughout all of this the seller has held the house for us, including turning down another increased offer from local people (we are moving out from London). And we encouraged them twice to go after another buyer when it looked like we couldn't follow through. But in June once the legal work was underway the report on title finally came through and it appears we'd been misled about the possibility of getting planning for an extension. I called the council who confirmed that planning consent wasn't likely to be granted, and we'd pinned our dreams on this. It was a large part of why we wanted the property. Part of the reason the surveys (we had four!) on the house came back low (all of them!) was that a lot of expensive work needed to be done on the roof, and if extending we wouldn't need to carry out this repair work as the renovations would cover it. And last week the sellers came back saying they wanted tens of thousands more as compensation for the delays. It has put me off a lot, if I'm honest. We said no and we haven't heard back since - we expect (expected?) them to pull out but we just haven't heard.

So to cover ourselves we went to look at a rental this weekend. Same road, closer to schools, closer to station and already extended so we wouldn't need to. It's perfect for us. And the kitchen, omg, it's stunning. I desperately want to live in it. A mortgage would be much cheaper than renting for a year but with stamp duty so high (south east house prices, arrrgh) I don't want to make a nearly £40k mistake on somewhere that's not perfect. Especially if we head into recession post-Brexit and can't sell it easily if we hate it/lose jobs. But I feel like I've basically wasted a year of our seller's time, and very guilty. We've all put so much time and money in to this. WWYD?

[Threesoundslikealot]

Of course they want you to have it. You were paying 100k over valuation! But you've done the right thing, and will be able to walk past with a clear conscience. I bet you see a For Sale sign out front for a while to come, and if not, starting watching the Sold prices to see what they ended up getting for it.

[TheVeryHungryDieter]

The seller has actually been very gracious about it and offered to back off the pressure and said the house is mine if I want it and he'd like us to have it. He's been very nice about it. The planning issue is very minor thing really, not a huge deal breaker but having discovered a planning issue with my own home (only in the course of selling it which has been another awful delay-causing headache), I'm twice shy.

They rang today to be sure I wasn't going ahead and to give me a chance to change my mind before they went after the other buyers, but I've had enough of buying and selling houses for now. I want to concentrate on getting mine off my hands and then rent for a while knowing we can move on chain free while we are already living in the school catchment area. The seller has my full blessing to go after the other buyer and I sincerely hope they get a higher price, as I genuinely personally liked them when we met. So we have ended it on good terms, which is a relief as we will be neighbours... I'm going to have to walk past it to get my son to his preschool!

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

Oh well done - really pleased for you that you've made that decision - now you can go ahead and rent the place that you liked and change your name, dye your hair and have a face transplant so your vendors will never recognise you
Have some

[Pipsqueak11]

Definitely the right decision! Hope you find the right place soon.

[Gunpowder]

YY well done.

[Scrumptiousbears]

I think you made the right decision. I know from the vendors point of view it's taken a long time but they mislead you then got greedy. They will do it to the next person too. Better being out of it than being lumbered with a house you are not happy with.

[TheVeryHungryDieter]

I pulled out of the purchase today.

It is a massive weight off my mind. I was so tense and wound up I couldn't sleep much last night - actually any night for the last week; I did it at lunchtime and I could barely keep my eyes open for the afternoon!

I am very sorry for the vendor. But I tried my hardest to buy in good faith for nearly a year and the stress of trying to line them up was making me quite ill. I'm so relieved not to have the weight of someone else's demands weighing heavily on me.

[Threesoundslikealot]

When we were getting our house valued, I decided immediately against going with a certain notorious firm after they proposed putting it on the market as suitable for a loft conversion, even though surveyors had told us categorically that this wouldn't be possible. Outrageous behaviour. And the same goes for your vendors. If they lied to you, they deserve exactly what they get.

[TheresaMaybutSheMayNot]

What did you decide OP? Did you pull out or did they?!

[purplefox]

Pull out, not only are you paying 100k more than what the house is worth which is crazy in itself they now want 10s of thousands more from you, as well as paying thousands in repairs for a house you don't really want.

[Daisygarden]

You can't buy a house that's unsuitable for your purposes because you don't want to offend the sellers.

Better that they had given you the real picture about the planning from the start. Some of their other potential buyers may not have wanted to extend so it wouldn't have been an issue for others.

If they genuinely got it wrong themselves somehow and believed they were telling you the real situation about planning, then that's sad for them but also the same for you.

[chilipepper20]

no, I'd be hugely relieved if they pulled out.

that's a major tip off that YOU should pull out!

[chilipepper20]

pull out. if you aren't getting what you thought you were getting, it's not worth it. This is a massive purchase. if you don't think it is right now, wait until you live in it and find out what else is wrong.

[EveOnline2016]

I'm not a home owner and never will be.

However I have a bad feeling about this house and if I was to invest in something worth thousands of pounds it wouldn't be this house.

[luda]

House Buying is an objective, legal process of survey/agreed price/ exchange of contracts/ completion. Not even the first of these 4 fundamental points has been satisfactorily met.
Nil points in the Must Have/Buy pot.
The other aspect of Home Buying is very much subjective, the emotional Feel Good Factor; I love it here, I can see how I can make it our dream nest, etc., etc..
When the only emotion this house can generate is Guilt and not elation/ exhilaration, there's no case to answer really.
Nil points in the Must Have/Buy pot.
Just step away from a property that is already making you unhappy both objectively and subjectively and don't waste any more time or energy on it.
Who knows what is going on with that house if the vendors, regardless of what they may say to you, have not been able to sell the house by now.
Be soooo grateful that you have not put your life savings into what is already giving off such negative vibes and that you are not taking on a property that you ultimately can't make work for you. Leave it for another family who might find joy in it as it suits their needs better.
If you want to alleviate your guilt feelings (if any still remain), the requested increase in purchase price has, disappointingly, put the house out of your budget range; straightforward reason, in the Objective Pot and no one can argue with that.
0% points in the Must Have/Buy Pot.
100% points in the Can't afford it/Don't Touch it with a Barge Pole Pot.
Personally, I would take the rented house on an AST contract with a break clause at 6 months (as opposed to a Fixed Term of one year). This will allow you some flexibility of tenure and give you time to clear your head and be more 'on it' when the next house comes along. Likewise with the Vendors; if they take the time to present their Sales Information accurately, they may be in a better position to process a sale with their next Purchaser more speedily.
Plan to enjoy a happy Christmas and New Year in a lovely house while bracing yourself for another house search.
Hope you find the home of your dreams.

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

No, pull out now.
Seriously, you owe them nothing.
It was THEIR CHOICE to hang about, put others off etc. - dump it, it sounds like one of those really bad bargains, where you think you'll only need to do the roof and then it turns out that actually the stairs also need to go, and it has dry rot, and some damp-proofing that was thought to be ok actually isn't, and you've probably got deathwatch beetle in the rafters - that kind of thing.

Just let it go and rent instead.

[TheVeryHungryDieter]

fuctifino no, I'd be hugely relieved if they pulled out. In fact, the reason I suspect we haven't heard back from the seller after I said no more money is because I think they are trying to line up another buyer who they've been speaking to before I found my current buyer. They've had this other couple on the hook for two months apparently. They like to remind us of that.

Brexit is also a concern for me and DH due to our nationality and nature of employment; the agent has had a number of sales fall through as a result of Brexit and wouldn't be terribly surprised by it I think.

[Viviennemary]

This is one of those times when you just have to do what's best for you. And it seems that is pulling out of the house purchase. The sellars will be annoyed but you can't go ahead with this if you don't want to. Whether you were misled or not isn't the real issue. You've changed your mind. Don't go ahead.

[IAmALionTamer]

I would feel terribly sorry for the vendor (and would be livid if I were in their shoes) but ultimately if I didn't feel that this property is right anymore then I would pull out. A house is too much of an investment, both personal and financial, for me to feel guilted into parting with hundreds of thousands.

That said I personally don't think that you have behaved and acted brilliantly as purchasers, as others have said you should have investigated sooner but what's done is done. In future you know to investigate planning possibilities and other issues much earlier on in the process.

I'd echo what other people have said about the homebuyers report - its really not worth the paper it's written on. Full structural survey is the way to go especially if you're planning on extending the property at a later date. The information in the report can help somewhat when the Architect is designing the extension (can act as a starter for 10 if you like)

[imother]

Forget the whole back story - yours and theirs - if you were starting your house search now, would you still buy it?

Don't be a victim of the sunken costs fallacy.

[fuctifino]

One way to look at it is if the vendors rang you today and said they'd decided to sell to somebody else, would you be gutted?
If not, walk away.

[Mouikey]

As a planner, you've now (at last!) listened to the right people! We're not ogres and are willing to help and give correct advice (although it's something you may have to pay for - yep even through the council). If the house had a refusal for the project you want to do, walk away otherwise you will spend a lot of money trying to get permission! With regard to the other property that has done the work as others have said it may not be that they even got consent!!! As an aside I've never known a planning authority to change a reason for refusal once it's been granted!

I wouldn't feel guilty about walking away from the purchase you need to do what's right for you and that property isn't right! If you find another house and want to extend talk to the planners first and don't tell the owners - you can get this information as a matter of public record and often owners will see an opening to ask for more cash!!!

[ElsieMc]

I worked in conveyancing for years and although not science, purchases that meandered on and on very rarely completed. There is too much doubt going on and in your case red flags are waving that absolutely cannot be ignored.

Three surveys have warned you you are paying too much. Purchases would fall through over £10,000-£15,000 shortfall, not £100,000. That is why the sellers have held out for you. No other reason.

You cannot extend say the Council, the ones who grant permission. It does not matter that someone else has one, how do you know they have the correct permissions?

The roof needs work, expensive work.

The sellers have tried to get you to compensate them for the wait - they have no legal recourse here - they have lost the gamble because you have said no.

They are doing you no favours, pull out now, it doesn't matter about the fall out. The worst case scenario is that you have lost three valuation fees and will have to pay your solicitors.

Renting, whilst expensive, buys you time and a safety net. Pull out today and go rent the other house before it goes.

[Scrumptiousbears]

Don't forget any other buyer would encounter the same problems. They would also find it over priced, most people would want to extend at some point and they'd find that out too plus the roof issue.

At the moment buyers are quite happy thinking all is ok and they have gotten away with telling you some porkies and to chance their arm they as you for more money.

I'd pull out. To buy something as expensive as a house that doesn't meet your needs and you can't make it meet your needs is just stupid.

[TheVeryHungryDieter]

Actually myname I think that's probably been one of the most helpful posts on the thread. When I think about going through with it I only feel dismay and a bit disappointed. That's pretty clear.