To be stressed to the hills over a surprise holiday

[Alfiemoon1]

My sister has paid for us to go to Florida in August as a Christmas present the flights Vila and car hire are all paid for. I am stressed as I am really struggling to save up for park tickets etc which is almost as much as the holiday on top of that I have my son moving to high school his uniform is over £300 bus pass £100 dd is doing duke of ed which is £250 ds trip £155 so this year we probably wouldn't have gone abroad. I am stressed I keep bursting into tears rowing with the hubby who refuses to make any cut backs so we can save money. To top it off my mum and sister are calling me ungrateful as I have mentioned I am worried about the money. Iam not but I am resentful of being put under this stress if she insisted on being elaborate and paying for a holiday why not a cheaper all inclusive instead of something that is going to cost me a fortune or ask me first instead of surprising me in front of the kids so I couldn't say no. Anyway any get rich quick schemes or free things to do in Florida so she hasn't wasted thousands on the flights and villa lol

[LagunaBubbles]

Your passports obviously need to be in date to travel but it's not true you need 6 months left on it for USA, that's one of those urban myths.

[Passthecake30]

I would definitely ask if she could get the park tickets as an early Xmas present, and id probably go, enjoy myself...and then after the event ask if you could be notified of gifts if they involved further outlay in future. You never know, she might be completely unaware of your financial situation and be embarrassed by it all.

[PatricianOfAnkhMorpork]

ETSA does need your passport details but can be done right up to 72 hours before you fly. Its all online, takes a few mins to do and is pretty much instant processing normally. Link to the official page is esta.cbp.dhs.gov/esta/

I renewed mine recently (its valid for 2 years) and I seem to remember it asked some fairly stupid questions like "have you ever thought of overthrowing the government?" like who hasn't?

[CaptainCrunch]

Goingtobe. My DD did silver DofE 2 years ago. Two expeditions cost £90 each plus an initial deposit of £50, additional costs are boots and other walking/camping equipment that you may not already have/supplied by the school. £250 is pretty standard. Bronze is about half that.

[ohdearme1958]

hy is the D of E £250? My son has done this and it hasn't cost anywhere near that

There's plenty information online supporting what the OP has said. With some people mentioning costs of up to 800 pounds.

There also appears to be two price tiers for enrollment costs so to speak, if I've understood it correctly with 245 being the cost of registering for the Gold if you don't belong to an organization registered with the DOE organization.

[PressRedToSelect]

The optimal time to apply for/renew an ESTA is before you've even booked your flights/accomodation.
I know that in practice most of us don't, but if it was refused and a traveller had to apply for a visa it could be an expensive process if flights etc are already booked and have to be cancelled.
Last time I checked, US visas for leisure visits of less than 90 days were taking approximately 26 weeks to process.

[Alfiemoon1]

Not sure going she's doing bronze had letter first practice trip £115 and second one £135 then a huge kit list but will deal with that in September

[Alfiemoon1]

I've already paid I think £50 duke of ed registration fee I know I paid something a few months ago

[Enjoyingthepeace]

What does your sis do to get £700 day overtime?!

[CaptainCrunch]

Also with DofE you have to factor in the cost of activities that support the physical and skill challenges. Volunteering can cost money if you have travel costs. It's an expensive business.

[Alfiemoon1]

No hope of reducing my sons uniform cost either as 90% of it has to be bought in the school shop and I know just for the logo mandatory bits it cost £300 when I bought my daughters a few years ago this doesn't include bag shoes shirts or trousers and was one of everything required

[Goingtobeawesome]

We paid £50 to hire kit, which we got back, plus a fiver for something else for bronze and silver. Plus the cosy of boots and a sleeping bag.

[CaptainCrunch]

Goingtobe eh? So the expeditions didn't cost anything? The insurance alone for the organisation running it is a huge cost. DS did Bronze earlier this year and the total cost of that was about £150. Both were done through their school. What organisation did you do it through, seems incredibly cheap.

[ohdearme1958]

Alfie, you sound in such a pickle. No wonder your at the end of your tether.

I had a look at the DOE award scheme and the official registration cost are 19 pounds for Bronze and Silver, 26 for gold.

Is there any way you can check up on what the 50 was for and ask why the need for 250 pounds.

There was one link I found online from a mum who said her and a few parents refused to go along with an expensive camp the leader had chosen so they went online and found one for a tenth of the cost in the UK.

[Alfiemoon1]

Not sure I should say enjoy as I have already had grief on this thread lol. But she is a medical assessor for benefits esa. When they have a backlog if she works a Saturday or Sunday and does 7 cases per day they pay £700 per day. I know it's ridiculous when people are having there benefits cut nothing to do with me so don't shoot the messenger lol

[CaptainCrunch]

ohdear. If it's run through the school, you more or less have to suck up what they say it is. This year at my DS turn to do bronze it was run as a curriculum subject. The school seem to be very invested in it. It might be different if you go through the Council or a Scout/Guide organisation.

I would imagine OP's DD would want to stick with the organisation she is using as she probably has friends on it, I know my DC wouldn't have agreed to do it with people they didn't know.

[ohdearme1958]

Captain, thank you. 😊 I forgot to add that the leader then had to go along with the experience the parents had chosen.

[Goingtobeawesome]

He's doing it through school. We certainly haven't paid £100's. .

[CaptainCrunch]

Well embrace it going, it seemed to cost us all a fortune .

[Goingtobeawesome]

Unless DH has paid it and not told me. I only knew ds was going on the first one about two days before .

[Gingersdohavesouls]

As your kids are older, why don't you explain to them that you can't afford days at the Disney park and all the things they may want to do, but tell them that there are plenty of things to do in Orlando for free or at a fraction of the cost, ask THEM to do some research online (teenage kids are great at this lol) and see what they would like to do.
They may find things that no one has mentioned yet, and it means they're involved.

I'm going thru something similar ATM, where my mother paid for a weeks holiday to Egypt. The plan was that I would care for my terminally ill father so she could have a break, but since paying for it my dad passed away and my Gran has been diagnosed as terminal (approx 6 months to live) and my mum has decided she doesn't want to leave the country, even for a week, so she can be here to look after her mum.
She has given me the ticket, which I am SO grateful for as I could never afford a luxury holiday in a million years as I'm disabled and on a very low income, but I now have approximately 9 weeks to save up - spending money, holiday clothes and shoes, travel insurance (which is quite expensive bcoz of my disability)

I really hope you manage to sort something out and can enjoy your holiday Alfiemoon

[PressRedToSelect]

Just something to add to CaptainCrunch (sorry for slight derail, OP). I've now got an annual Worldwide (inc USA) insurance policy for less than my previous one trip policy. Thanks again!

[diddl]

If you have been before then surely there is no need to do theme parks this time?

[Alfiemoon1]

Ds was only 3 last time we went so doesn't really remember it will look at cheaper packages thanks everyone

[Alfiemoon1]

Yes she is doing her duke of ed through school