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AIBU?

...to think that raising a dog is brilliant training for raising a kid??

79 replies

Sheilasfeels · 21/06/2016 23:31

So me and DH are trying for a baby. We have a two year old dog. Basically I'm pretty sure that I've got this whole parenting thing sussed now and raising a child will be a walk(ies) in the park. How do I know? Let's look at the evidence:

Cleaning up poo - check
Being woken up at 6 a.m. to play a game - check
Me and DH not having sex because the dogs asleep in the middle of the bed - check

AIBU or am i basically a parenting expert right now?

OP posts:
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Zaurak · 22/06/2016 12:46

When you get the dog, take a large sharp object and create a wound about 30cm long on your abdomen
Attach the dog to your person, take only paracetamol and don't sleep for three days.
Attach the dog to your person at home and have it wake you every twenty minutes.
Repeat for nine months.
Worry constantly about the dog, about it waking you every twenty minutes for say, nine months.

If you have any sanity left at this point and haven't taken the dog to a kennels then you may be suited to parenthood.

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NinjaLeprechaun · 22/06/2016 12:45

I have heard it said that you should raise children, dogs, and horses the same way. I think this is vaguely sensible.
On the other hand, my daughter thought she was a dog until she was 4. Grin

"Nothing prepares you for the sleepless nights of a young baby."
I hand raised kittens from about 3 days old. They wanted to be fed every half-an-hour, around the clock. It definitely warned me about what I would be in for.

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BirdintheWings · 22/06/2016 12:22

Cigars, I think you need to teach your dog to say Sausages

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KoalaDownUnder · 22/06/2016 12:21

My dog sleeps like a log...during the day.

At night, she crashes around barking at imaginary cats. Angry

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Laiste · 22/06/2016 12:15

MargaretCavendish Wed 22-Jun-16 10:37:46- Laiste I think the man is desperately - desperately! - waiting for the day that your husband realises what he is passive-aggressively trying to tell him: stop boring childless people with accounts of your child and its tantrums.

Confused

So many assumptions. Projecting perhaps?

Our DD doesn't have tantrums for a start, why assume that? Plus DH doesn't give ''accounts'' about his life to anyone. He simply tells his mate on a Monday morning (building site) that he's had a tiring weekend with DD4 and the guy regales DH with boring accounts about life with his bloody dogs - and how much it must be like having a toddler. So stick that in your pipe.

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CigarsofthePharoahs · 22/06/2016 12:15

Is your dog currently sat on your lap refusing to let you move (cup of tea juust out of reach) making a sort of "Ah wah dih dah nah..." whiney cry over and over whilst refusing to eat lunch. I bet he wont nap either, despite being very obviously tired.
On the other hand it's probably easier to cut a 2 year olds nails than a dogs.
I have pins and needles in my leg and I can't move. If it was my cat on my lap I'd have pushed her off by now without a second thought, but not the toddler.
You can't teach a dog to call people a silly sausage.

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PatMullins · 22/06/2016 12:10

A dog doesn't hang off your tit for 15 months.

Angry

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toolonglurking · 22/06/2016 12:06

I actually have to agree with you, certainly for the early days, and if you have had no really big responsibility before
Our puppy had us up late at night, during the night and early in the morning crying and wanting out to pee. I never let her out of my sight, feed her, made sure she had every thing she needed and gave her all my love.
Now I have a 12 week old baby I've noticed there really similarities!

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dollylucy · 22/06/2016 11:55

Dogs do sleep, but not necessarily at the time you want them to.

Op I think you've definitely got a point.
I have a very difficult child and a clingy dog, there's lots of similarities!

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Bumpsadaisie · 22/06/2016 11:47

Hmm.

Dogs can give you a flavour of what its like to have a dependent whose physical exercise and companionship needs you need to take care of.

But at the end of the day they are a lot simpler and you have much more control.

Dogs sleep (don't they? Does anyone have a dog that refuses to sleep).

They are happy to be fed. If you give a hungry dog some food they eat it thankfully. They don't have a major grump because they are hungry, ask you for toast and then have a tantrum because you cut it up the wrong way, chuck it on the floor and say they hate you.

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MunchCrunch01 · 22/06/2016 11:47

i don't have to pay £10 per hour for someone to babysit my dog...dog babysitting maxes out at £25 per 24 hours. He's a bargain!

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AppleSetsSail · 22/06/2016 11:45

This reminds me of my cousin and partner who couldn't wait for the baby to be born so they could get back to normal

Hilarious. 'We're so fed up with this pregnancy! Things will be so much easier after the baby is out!'.

Snort.

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LazyJournalistsQuoteMN · 22/06/2016 11:43

I call reverse Grin
I have friends who think the same. They're in for a huge shock if they ever have children.

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Owllady · 22/06/2016 11:41

This reminds me of my cousin and partner who couldn't wait for the baby to be born so they could get back to normal

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BertieBotts · 22/06/2016 11:40

Puppies are adorable toddlers in that hell bent on destroying everything and getting as mucky as possible phase and then they grow up into dogs who are like eternal preschoolers except they don't talk as much.

Kittens are like hyperactive preteens who grow up into cats who are just like teenagers. They ignore you, only demanding vast quantities of food, stay out all night so you'll wait up worrying and drag no end of bizarre things home.

See. Easy Grin Totally prepared.

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AppleSetsSail · 22/06/2016 11:37

My 10 month old golden retriever reminds me a lot of a toddler in that she's clumsy and adorable.

That's where the similarity ends - my dog is obedient and eager to please, sleeps 20 hours a day, bends her mood to fit mine, eats whatever I give her, etc.

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PenguinsAreAce · 22/06/2016 11:28

Do you realise babies grow into real human people? 8 yr olds, 12yr olds and 16 yr olds are a lot more complicated and expensive than dogs.

Babies are also not a lot like dogs either really.

Good luck ttc

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ImSoVeryTired · 22/06/2016 11:26

Actually, I found my dog harder work in the day, when she was a puppy. She used to follow me everywhere and try to round me up, nipping my trousers or ankles. If I sat down she would try to play, very bitey. So far, despite the odd very tough day, my four month old is a bit easier in the day. He has a routine, sort of.
However, the dog is now 4 and very easy, in comparison.
Nothing prepares you for the sleepless nights of a young baby.
Overall, baby is harder as you have a bigger effect on their life and childhood lasts longer. Puppyhood only lasts a few years.

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LordoftheTits · 22/06/2016 11:19

DH and I were never very sold on the idea of having kids. Then we got a puppy. "Puppy" is now 3yo and we are absolutely sure we don't wants kids!

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DJBaggieSmalls · 22/06/2016 11:05

If you can deal with a dog with patience, understanding and good humour, set boundaries and use No, then yes its good training for parenting.
I dont think anyone claimed it was an identical experience. Smile

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KoalaDownUnder · 22/06/2016 11:02

Y'know, though, here's the other side of dog vs child:

  1. Children are welcome on public transport, in cafes/ restaurants, in shops and hotels. Dogs are (generally) not. Therefore, much easier to travel with child than dog.


  1. Children do not escape from house and run away too fast to be caught, across busy roads.


  1. Children do not run outside and shout at the top of their voices at birds, causing you to have to bolt from the bed and wrestle them inside before the neighbours complain.


  1. Children do not jump up on visitors, except in ways that are considered adorable.


  1. Children eventually become able to talk, and tell you their feelings and if they are happy or being mistreated, unlike dogs: an advantage when you are forced to leave them in daycare


  1. Grandparents love taking care of grandchildren for a few days while you fuck off for mini-break; barking, jumping, shitting dog - not quite so much.


  1. Children mature and become more independent. Dogs stay needy fuckers for up to 15 years.


Source: 'parent' of high-energy greyhound-X rescue dog who hasn't had a holiday for 1.5 years due to said dog.

(please note - all of the above is my experience only. Experience will vary from person to person and dog to dog. Is also light-hearted WinkGrin)
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Brokenbiscuits86 · 22/06/2016 10:52

Honestly if I could have my time again I'd stick with my dog, parenthood is overrated imo...

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AppleSetsSail · 22/06/2016 10:52

You can also leave a dog in a crate overnight.

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MunchCrunch01 · 22/06/2016 10:51

hyper, large breed dog, 2 cats all pre DC, having the DC was incomparably harder because of the relentlessness of it. Borrowing other people's kids and having even 2 dogs is not preparation. I can leave my dog for 4 hours and go shopping, I can't leave my toddler for 5 minutes without her trying some dare devil maneovre.

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Glomerulus · 22/06/2016 10:50

I actually agree with you OP, getting a dog was a shock to the system and forced a lot of discipline, routine and compromise into our lives that made having a baby fairly straightforward in comparison. I would go as far as saying that having a baby has been easier than having a puppy/dog, although I may reconsider once DC gets a bit older and can answer back!

I can't say this IRL though, because it makes me sound like a dick.

Good luck with the TTC!

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