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AIBU?

To let my DCs spend their university money on something else

54 replies

flashheartscanoe · 07/06/2016 09:57

A while ago I inherited some money from my grandmother. At the time we decided to invest it for the kids so we could contribute towards their university costs when the time came. We don't have a big income so it would be a struggle otherwise. Its not enough to pay for it all and they will need loans and jobs as well. Roll on a few years and the eldest is talking about uni and potentially doing a long and expensive course. It's time to talk to them about it - I don't want her to feel she didnt have the same choices as the others so we need to be clear from the start. So here's the question...if you part fund a long course for the eldest would you let the others have the same amount to potentially do something else with?

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whois · 07/06/2016 17:34

£50k each - for uni, house deposit or other education/training or entrepreurial activity age under 30. Or you get it no strings attached at 30.

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Bolograph · 07/06/2016 18:15

My and DP are currently saving for a house deposit, and by not having any debt we are going to be able to get a significantly better mortgage rent than we would otherwise.

Alternatively, you could be paying 9% of your income over the threshold while your parents give you the deposit and you immediately buy a house, rather than renting, which is (I would guess) a larger outgoing than 9% of your income over the threshold.

Comparing these two scenarios is not remotely easy, and a lot depends on the extent to which you regard "being debt free" (even though this being the only sort of debt in existence whose repayments are almost entirely decoupled from the capital sum) as being a moral good worth spending money on.

I modelled various scenarios for my children, and there are very few (most of them about rapidly being high earners) in which early repayment or not taking the loans in the first place is preferable to having the capital sum. If your parents are rich enough to pay the fees and living costs from income, or are rich enough that they can pay the fees and loans from capital without significantly impacting their ability to later give you more, then the situation is different: the rich are different to us, and all that.

My modelling of course depends on the sets of assumptions I used and a couple of bits of integral calculus on which I was a bit shaky and had to use Wolfram Alpha to cover my blushes but I'd be surprised if the basis that people are arguing differently is any better supported than my decisions.

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HairyMuffandProud · 07/06/2016 18:16

Op there you go, you have already lived this yourself.

Yes MSE always bangs on about looking on the loan in a different way.

Without a doubt, spit it equally for them, even though you may see uni - in whatever help you provide as a worthier option.

Split it but make sure both lots of money goes to something tangible like deposit for house, which as people say is the killer right now and main issue facing our young.

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flashheartscanoe · 07/06/2016 21:45

Thus has really clarified things for me, thank you to everyone who has replied. I have to admit my integral calculus is a bit rusty!

For now I will make it clear that we will contribute a bit for uni but a similar amount would be available if they chose to do something else.
I'm going to hold back the bulk of it and revisit at a later date. I would love to help them with a deposit but I like the idea of releasing it anyway if they haven't gone that route by a certain age.

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