To be worried about baby ds and nursery?

[Noisylion]

Ds is 11.5 months and will be starting nursery in a couple of months.

I'm worried about him going for the following reasons.

He's a right moaner, I find it hard to put him down long enough to do anything. He won't sit in his highchair while I tidy the kitchen or start dinner, not even for 5 minutes with some toys, he just screams the place down. He will play on the floor for a bit but soon starts tugging at me and whinging. He cries so loudly people say he's got some lungs on him. He is happy and playful but he just wants to be free not sat in a highchair or rocker etc and when he needs something he lets you know loudly. For example when I'm feeding him breakfast and he wants his drink in between he points at it and shrieks.

He needs almost silence to sleep. I have got him into a routine where he'll sleep in his cot from awake, but he's a nightmare anywhere else and the slightest noise wakes him up.

He shits constantly, I've just changed his fourth poo today and he will most likely do another later on. Most days he will do at least 4 poos. I've no idea if this is normal but I mentioned it to the HV and she didn't seem worried. He eats really well, his diet is normal, cereal & fruit for breakfast, sandwiches/eggs/cheese for lunch and fish/meat & veg for tea, fruit & yoghurt for pudding. Milk in between and before bed. He's otherwise healthy, 75th centiles for h&w and meeting his milestones.

Oh and he will not keep still for a nappy change. My heart literally sinks when he has a poo because it is almost impossible to change him. He twists around and arches his back and gets really angry. Sometimes we end up with shit everywhere because you're there trying to wipe his bum and he's throwing himself around like an octopus. I picked him up from mil once and all his poppers were open on his vest and dungarees because she just couldn't do them up he was wriggling and crying so much.

I'm not being pfb, ds1 was totally different and loved nursery, I just feel as though they're going to get sick of ds2 moaning and they'll never keep up with his constant pooing. I'm worried that he'll never sleep and get really distressed.

Can you reassure me or do I need to give up work?

[amarmai]

I wd need a break. If I were you, op!

[Noisylion]

Thanks so much for the reassurance it really is good to hear.

Thanks for the reassurance on his food too, I'm happy as so far he eats anything (I know that might change), it's really rubbed off on ds1 too, probably should be the other way round but there you go.

[BillSykesDog]

Babynail, you talk rubbish. Low carb diets are bad for children.

[Nuggy2013]

Your DS sounds like my DD. Nursery staff have told DH to stop asking if she's been good/ok etc as she is (their words, not ours) as good as gold every day. they behave differently in nursery, don't be worried, he'll get used to it and enjoy it

[Billyray23]

Nursery practitioner here. Please don't worry your baby will be fine. We are used to "moany" babies and poo is nothing to us.

Try to stay relaxed about him starting nursery as baby will pick up on your negative vibe.

Your ds diet sounds great. Ignore the critic s/he obviously has nothing better to do

[CaitAgusMadra]

WTF? A low carb diet is not suitable for a baby

[Noisylion]

He doesn't have any sugary cereals, it's weetabix or porridge with a bit of fruit chopped in. When I say sandwiches he has a slice of whole meal bread with some scrambled egg/cheese/humous/chicken with some cucumber, lettuce & tomato. He doesn't have that everyday though because sometimes he has reheated leftovers.

Possible intolerance aside I'm not concerned with what he eats.

[OMGBabyNo3]

Wow-what's wrong with cereal and bread as part of a healthy balanced diet?! By cereal, I mean weetabix/bran flakes/corn flakes etc (I can see what is wrong with frosties/co co pops etc...

Sorry op I do realise I'm derailing the thread a bit here!

[LBOCS2]

Noisy, I just used to change DD on the floor and pin her there with my leg over her stomach. It looks mean, but it was the only way to deal with it and stop her from wriggling off!

[Noisylion]

Oh and I always give him a toy to hold when I'm changing him, sometimes it works but sometimes it ends up, thrown into the poo, thrown across the floor and him lunging to go after it, or just thrown and him still screaming and wriggling.

If there's two of us one will try to keep him distracted but it never works.

It's impossible to hold his legs, use the other hand for wiping when he's turning over and kicking like mad to crawl off or him sitting up.

I was in no rush to toilet train ds1 but I'll be glad when this one is out of nappies!

[babynail]

Stop feeding him cereal and bread. Yogurt is fine if full fat without sugar. Other things are OK. Make sure he gets enough fats and greens.

[Noisylion]

They look totally normal to me, not hard but not runny either. Probably the consistency of wet sand.

Sometimes he does little hard ones or explosive ones but not very often. Sometimes he does what we call plasticine poo.

Today he did two tiny ones then two big ones so as if he hadn't finished properly but it's not unusual for him to have 4-5 normal sized poos.

I'd wondered if he was eating too much but he only has baby sized portions and soon stops when he's full up.

Have thought possible dairy/gluten intolerance but as he seems otherwise healthy told myself it's just normal for him.

He was having his 12 month check (at 10 months) and he'd pooed, I mentioned to the HV and she said it looked normal.

[Beth2511]

What about a childminder?

My 18 month old goes to a really lovely pair of childminders where she will happily nap (battle at home), lie still for nappy changes and eat anything going. I was so so worried about her before hand as she has always been said to be a massive handful but it really seems to have help calm her down a bit! Still wont let me change her bum withoit a battle and poo everywhere but i can cope with that!

[crayfish]

My DS is 10.5 months and very very similar (bar the eating - your DS has the diet of a king compared to mine who will only eat cheese and toast... ). I actually laughed out loud at the octopus thing because that's what I say about DS. He's starting nursery in about three weeks and I have been very anxious like you. Similarly my DS will only ever sleep in his cot, with the whole 'white noise', shh pat thing and isn't clingy but is very.... Wilful? To put it nicely!

That said, this thread has really reassured me. I actually think nursery will be good for my DS and am hopeful it might lead to him eating more/different food and being a bit more flexible about sleep. At least that's the positive spin I am putting on it, as I can't afford to stop work. I am going to give it til Christmas and review things then though as I could go part- time. Maybe you should try that - give it a set time and then see how things are?

I am very happy with my nursery choice though and I think you have to be.

[WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant]

Are his poos normal?

Not little bricks or brown water...?

If so, 3 or 4 small poos is fine.

3 or 4 runny poo-splosions every day is likely to be diet related.

As he gets older, he is likely to have fewer, larger poos.

Same with wees.

[MyNewBearTotoro]

I don't think there's anything wrong with his diet but I would probably be tempted to play around with it a bit just to make sure there's nothing in it making him poo so often. It might just be normal for him but have you tried a few days cutting out some of the possible causes - milk/dairy, wheat/gluten etc? If you can eliminate them one at a time from his diet for a week or so and see if there's any change. If not add them back and try the next possibility. As I said it might be completely normal for him but it's possible he is intolerant to something.

[Claraoswald36]

God go back and let nursery sort him out! Sounds like you need a break. They will manage him right and fine

[liquidrevolution]

Nursery will be fab for him. My DD would only be fed to sleep and ate very little food when she started at 9 months. The routine the nursery has does helped

Around that age I stated giving a small toy to DD on the change table. Sainsburys do these small wood dinosaurs in a tube which are fab. One is each hand and I let her choose them each time. Ideal for holding and still being able to get arm through sleeves plus distraction from wriggling.

Cant help with the winging I'm afraid. DD is a very chilled baby but can whinge for england if I am around. Fine with other people though

[jo2107]

From what i've seen with friends fussy babies, nursery can often be the best place for them as it makes them more independent. They are used to fussy babies, i'm sure he'll be fine, really helped my niece get over her clingyness. All the best.

[StarlingMurmuration]

They'd put him in dungarees when I picked him up the other day, because he's done a horrible pooslosion, and he'd unpopped all the leg poppers. They said he kept doing it all afternoon!

[StarlingMurmuration]

DS is just like this. I leave him at nursery and let them cope! He's settled in brilliantly because he's always got something new and interesting to do. He didn't nap well at first, but now he does two hours every afternoon, goes down without a murmur like he does at home, and would sleep for longer if they let him (I've told them not to!). You're going to be paying them as much as your mortgage to change his nappies, so don't sweat it.

[Noisylion]

I've just read my op back I do sound quite mean about the baby. Honestly love him to bits I was just trying to paint the picture of why I'm worried.

I've just got visions of him not getting any sleep and flinging himself off the changing station while his key worker ends up covered in poo.

Of course they will have seen it all before. I know that there are bits about nursery that he'll love. Ds1 went there and they do some great activities. It would make sense to at least go back and see how things are after a couple of months.

[AugustaFinkNottle]

Really flexible jobs with good perks are like gold dust - if you gave it up you'd never find anything similar when your children are at school.

[Noisylion]

These posts are so reassuring and helping me to look at it a bit more logically.

I mentioned what he eats to point out that there's nothing unusual that might make him poo so often.