To hide my toilet paper and other stuff my flatmates keeps using?!

[Nonotmenori]

I recently moved into a flat share with two strangers. When I moved in I brought with me a wholesale amount of toilet paper. 50 rolls. I also bought pots and pans and a panini grill. (Everyone used their own pots and pans and there is no toaster) I have also replaced the kettle as the last one was full of lime scale and frankly just disgusting.

Flatmate B was away on holiday to her home country when I moved in. I met her when I was living there 3-4 weeks already. Flatmate A and I get on really well. When bins need emptying we both just do it. Same with cleaning. If something looks dirty we just get on with it. It's more a case of wherever sees it first will do it.

Flatmate B came back about 4 weeks ago. She is apparently starting a new job since she moved into here, but hasn't worked as she says she is working for the government and its taking some time for security clearance. So she is always here. And never goes out...

Flatmate A has taken a month off work to return to her home country. She's been gone 2 weeks now.

In the time Flatmate A has been gone. B hasn't emptied the bins even though they're overflowing with her crap. She has used my panini grill to toast her bread. And leaves behind crumbs every. Single. Time. When she asked about it I said yes please help yourselves just clean up after please. She has used one of my saucepans (it's cheap at £3 sainsburys basics) but has used a knife or spoon on it and scratched it. The toilet paper I brought ran out about 2 weeks ago. She knows i bought so much. As when I took her shopping she told me to buy a massive pack of bounty and I said no it's ok I'm only needing a two pack as its for my use only. I said to B her and A need to make sure about the toilet paper as I've bought over 50 rolls and its between the two of them for a while. She said nothing.

Fast forward to this week. She has put into the toilet 3 rolls over the course of the week. Never takes out the empty holders. Thursday the roll has ran out again.  It is still there now (Sunday) and she has not replaced it. I have gotten really annoyed so have taken to bringing my toilet paper in with me and removing when I leave. I have also replaced the washing up liquid. She has her own but is using mine. I have since taken that out of the kitchen. I have also had to top up the electricity and gas and she's done nothing whilst always being here. I work full time.


I honestly feel like she's taking the piss now. AIBU to stand my ground and not share anymore? I've done enough. I've even lent her a full length mirror as she didn't have one. I've taken her to the shops to do shopping as I'm the only one with a car. I'm not a mean person. I share with anyone, but I am feeling like I'm being taken advantage of and yet I'm feeling like being a petty bitch. QWhat's everyone's thoughts?

[GlitterNails]

I had this problem when I had housemates. I took to buying my own loo roll and taking it in and out with me.

Also had stuff stolen from the fridge/freezer, etc.

So when I next did a houseshare was very upfront with the costs. We put in £10 each into a kitty (4 of us) and we bought cleaning supplies and loo roll from it, and put the receipt in. When it was empty, we all put in £10 again. That worked really well - because it was easier for myself and my other housemate to get the stuff, as we had a car, but the other two housemates didn't then always skip out on the cost.

There will always be battled, sadly. Ours was over heating. Their bedrooms were all upstairs, mine was downstairs and a garage conversion. It was freezing, mouldy and damp. They said their rooms were always hot, so wanted to heating off. I had icicles on my windows. And the living room was unusable, as it was also freezing. I bought an electric heater secretly in the end. Obviously it cost more, but I was having chest infection after chest infection and being really ill.

[DontMindMe1]

under the floor boards?!!!!!

was he scared you were after his blood as well?

crazy people - and they roam among us!

[Gide]

Pull her up on it, Jesus, she's an adult, not a teenager away from home for the first time. Is she expecting stuff to miraculously appear? Dumbass.

A flat mate used to hide his coffee under the floorboards, used our stuff and never shared. He didn't last long, fortunately.

[DontMindMe1]

i had to keep all my stuff in my room, including my soap and shampoo, dirty housemate left her pubes stuck in my soap once, i told her if she wants to be disgusting like that she can do it to her own stuff. yuck!

[Nonotmenori]

Dontmindme it's A who needs to have the chat really. It's her place not mine. I'm the newest Flatmate. I'm going to carry on locking my stuff up and will leave the overflowing bins as they are. She's been slamming the kitchen door again it's across from my room. At leas she's closed it so whatever she's cooking isn't stinking out my room for a change. I'll speak to A see if she can talk to her again or ask her to leave. She's annoying us both the last time I spoke to her. Before she went on holiday she spoke to her. That was about the cleaning and being fair. Next thing for me to lock away is my panini grill.

[DontMindMe1]

what she does with her free time DOES have something to do with this.......especially when others are using their free time to shop for household stuff and doing their share of chores and she doesn't.

when you ask someone why they're not doing their share of chores/picking up after themself etc, you are asking them indirectly what they're doing with their time.

[IonaNE]

What she does with her free time has nothing to do with this, she is entitled to do as she wishes, even to stay at home all day if she wants. She is not entitled to do the things you describe, OP. Yes, I'd lock everything away. Pls let us know what she will use for loo paper when there is no more communal paper?

[DontMindMe1]

i don't understand why you haven't discussed this with her already??

tell her she needs to reimburse you for the gas and she needs to pay her share. If she's home all day using more utilities then she needs to pay for them.

and why haven't you asked her why she's not cleaning and tidying up? what exactly is she doing all day??

if she wants to act like an inconsiderate child then treat her like one. put up a cleaning rota with everyone's names and duties - this would include both general household chores AND cleaning up after oneself. put up another list for household stuff that needs replacing/mandatory - toilet rolls, cleaning stuff, hoover bags, washing up liquid, soap, washing powder etc. Then write the names of who bought them next to the items - she can't avoid that.

[FoodieToo]

Hilarious Liney!!

[Nonotmenori]

Ah ok, but you'd think she would do something with her time? Me personally would take up a part time role. The pub 5 doors down is desperate for staff right now. I couldn't sit here all day everyday.

[Whatthefreakinwhatnow]

Yes, depending on the level of clearance you need it can take time, and there is always a backlog! It makes recruitment sooooo slow!

[LineyReborn]

Try not to be a wuss. I know it's hard, but at 27 your flatmate should be more responsible.

Maybe ask her some questions, e.g., 'What do you think should happen when we run out of loo roll? What's a fair way of sharing the tidying up?'

[Nonotmenori]

Liney she's 27. I'm 33 so I'm the older of them both. A is also 27. Except in reality I'm really about 21 in my head

[Nonotmenori]

5 months Freak?! Oh my days. I reckon A will do her nut. Along with myself

[LineyReborn]

I've had flatmates who ate my food, made a mess, let strangers in to sleep on the sofa, didn't pay their share of the bills, and never cleaned the bath.

I think of it as practice for having teenagers.

[Nonotmenori]

Hi Leopard,

All bills are included in the rent. The reason I paid the gas and electricity is because it's on a meter and it's A who deals with it, but she is away and we were running low. So I deducted some of my rent to cover them both. B could have done the same, but seems she wanted me to cover it. Im not sure what her financial situation is. She isn't working and she doesn't do anything. If she's having difficulties she should say and I'd help where I can until she starts her job. She doesn't smoke, doesn't drink doesn't go out shopping except for Sainsburys. For all I know she could be be minted and tight with her money. I'm no way rich or even comfortable, but I do try and save a little for emergencies.

I really don't want to move out. I enjoy living here. The area is great and I can park my car for free (which is unheard of in London)

[Whatthefreakinwhatnow]

Sorry OP,but when I first started my government agency job, my clearence took 5 months to come through, so she could be just hanging about for quite some time yet!

[SocialDisaster]

I would move out.

[Leopard12]

How do you pay bills? I find having a cash kitty is hard work as no one has change etc but when I had two lovely flatmates I set up a spare account in my name for bills and all three of us set up a direct debit to it which included extra for any shared items, although people did occasionally buy extras with their own money and no one seemed bothered. Although you do need to make sure there's enough in it every month if bills bounce it's your fault. You could do a card kitty, keep the card by the front door or safe space, say all transfer £20 to it and when it runs out same again, £60 should last a while for small items, need to ensure items are paid separately at the till though.

Some things you just need to let slide otherwise it just becomes very petty about who uses x squares of toilet rolls per day etc and a horrible environment to live in but if you've bought 50 it's totally unreasonable to expect you to buy anymore for a while yet!

[Nonotmenori]

Ps I never hid 50 rolls I put the ones I bought in the communal area so everyone can stock up on the bathroom when it's low. I have 3 rolls in my room. Guess who will have to stock up soon enough

[Nonotmenori]

Haha Witch I was just thinking the exact same when I read the other posters thread. I'm a member of Costco so I can get about 50 rolls for about £15 I think it is.

[Witchend]

Flatmates and 50 toilet rolls... And hiding them. Is there a special offer on somewhere?

[Nonotmenori]

Oh good idea. I'll defiantly speak to A when she comes back and suggest the kitty idea. I reckon she's also been out of pocket re cleaning stuff and loo roll. It does seem silly all this over TP, but it's the principle of it. Thanks all. Will update what A comes back in about two weeks as she's useless texting.

[RandomMess]

Our kitty worked like this:

List of what you bought and what it cost under your name.

Every so often you would add up what it all cost, what each had paid in and who owed what to the others.

Worked better than the kitty as there was a visible list of who was buying what so the person who never shopped was very obvious. Also good when some drive and others don't as it's easier to stock up and get bargains when you are diving to supermarket.

[ilovewelshrarebit123]

I've house shared, its easy, just get a kitty pot. Everyone puts say a £5/£10 a month in, used to buy loo roll, fairy, kitchen roll and cleaning stuff.

Go to the pot if it runs out, I couldn't be bothered arguing over loo roll. Kitty makes it so much easier!