Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Unflip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Unflip

1 2 3

AIBU?

To think sister isn't happy with our 'happy news'?

69 replies

DimpledDonut · 27/02/2016 19:35

DP and I are expecting. It has come as a bit of a shock...

I sent a group email (close family) with the scan picture and everyone got very exited, had a barrage of messages and phone calls. My sister said wow what a shock, congrats, and haven't heard from her since. She hasn't liked the announcement DP made to his acquaintances on Facebook or my scan picture.

She uses Social media a lot so I don't think it's a case of rather having heard in person - we live pretty far away from all our family.

OP posts:

Report

Frusso · 28/02/2016 12:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 28/02/2016 10:54

Yabu. A direct congratulations is more important than a Facebook like. Maybe your DH is a Facebook bore and she's unfollowed his posts?

tobysmum77 · 28/02/2016 10:49

I think it was a bit off to tell your sister via a group email. However she replied, congratulated you and is now going about her own life. You are hand wringing about a post on Facebook that she may bit even have seen not being 'liked' by her? That is coming across as very needy unless there is something I am missing.

MidniteScribbler · 28/02/2016 10:05

I find other people's pregnancies completely boring. I even found my own to be completely boring. I don't care about your morning sickness, your cravings, and I have no interest in a scan photo of your insides, and I really don't need to see weekly "bump" selfie updates.

I'll coo and make the appropriate noises when an actual human being emerges from you, but until then, there are some things that don't need to be shared on social media.

PrincessMouse · 28/02/2016 06:18

Congratulations Op

YABU, personally I would find a group email announcement impersonal and a bit cold. Like some have already said I would hope DB and DS would make the effort to tell personally (email, phone or even a text).

That aside your DS did respond to your email and congratulate you. FB has a lot to answer for. Thank god I am not on it anymore. I never posted or liked baby scan announcements on FB. If I saw one I would send a personal message. Having mc myself, I thought them insensitive to those peopl that may see them that may have suffered a loss or have difficulties ttc.

I didn't mean for this to sound so harsh.

Katenka · 28/02/2016 05:56

My sil gets arsey if you don't like a fb status.

She was went in hospital for a planned operation, 6 weeks ago. It wasn't enough that I called her to tell I was thinking about her, before she went in. Sent flowers and called dbro every day for updates.

But I didn't like her FB posts about or comment on them.

I really can't see the issue. She said congratulations.

BitOutOfPractice · 28/02/2016 04:59

If my sister told me news line this in a round robin email I would be very very hurt and upset

Frecklesfrecklesfreckles4 · 28/02/2016 02:48

After l miscarried I found it very difficult to be around people who were pregnant, not that I wasn't happy for them, but it was a physical reminder of what I had lost and felt very raw. For self preservation I had to step back a little for a while. Maybe your sister has had difficulties you don't know about?

CrazyMary · 28/02/2016 02:31

Maybe she is upset to be lumped in with a public group on social media rather than you making the effort to tell her individually. I hate social media announcements, they are so inpersonable.

cornishglos · 28/02/2016 02:25

Maybe she has other things going on rright now, and will have the time and headspace to respond 'better' soon.

squoosh · 28/02/2016 02:05

Yes it is hurtful when family, friends, acquaintances ignore/belittle your child in some way.

Her sister hasn't ignored or belittled.

Maybe 'Mumma Bear' needs to stop placing so much importance on Facebook.

Jenny70 · 28/02/2016 01:03

She may not be happy about the news, but you are and in life you can't make this baby the centre of everyone's world, only the centre of yours.

So take this as the first lesson in standing up and taking it on the chin. Yes it is hurtful when family, friends, acquaintances ignore/belittle your child in some way. But you love this child and you will not knowingly do anything to hurt them in any way, that is your job as a mother. Your Mumma Bear instinct is already growing, you are protecting your baby from hurt, even though they couldn't possibly know Aunty X hasn't liked the news on FB. But it is the start of the Mumma Bear, and you need to learn to tame the bear - big enough to see off real danger, but not so agressive that you become scary!

Buttons23 · 27/02/2016 23:07

I don't get this, she emailed back congratulations, like what more do you want.

Surely this thread is not just made on the basis she didn't like a Facebook post?

diddl · 27/02/2016 23:03

I just don't get the thought that she isn't happy for you because she hasn't pressed "like" on FB.

That really is overthinking things.

I rarely "like" things, even when I like them!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 27/02/2016 22:58

I do tend to agree with other posters. You can't expect constant congratulations and likes on FB for the next 8 months while you're pregnant.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 27/02/2016 22:56

But she said 'congratulations'. Why does she have to like it on Facebook?!

landrover · 27/02/2016 22:55

I would be really upset that my sister didn't pick up the phone and tell me (sorry). Congratulations though x

DawnOfTheDoggers · 27/02/2016 22:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CocktailQueen · 27/02/2016 22:39

I would be devastated if my sister told me at 12 weeks by fucking Facebook that she was pregnant. I would be so upset.

Maybe that's your answer?

Bluebolt · 27/02/2016 22:30

I find it strange when I see close family responding to families posts on Facebook, that is normally done on a more personal level leaving fb for wider family and friends. The like button is just another reason to fucking hate fb a bit like texts and having to respond to avoid upset even when news should be one on one not some sort of group attachment. You have great news it should be shared on a level it deserves.

Italiangreyhound · 27/02/2016 22:19

DimpledDonut Congratulations on your pregnancy, I hope you can enjoy it and not worry too much what others say or think.

I found out my sister was pregnant by accident. There were reasons why but I still felt very hurt indeed. I think including your sister in a group email was a very inconsiderate way to tell her.

I think noticing whether she has liked or not liked a post rather than talking to her on the phone is a very unusual response. Why not just call her for a chat?

Good luck.

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 27/02/2016 22:11

I don't recall my brother saying congratulations. I think he said 'are you really up the duff again?'

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Louise43210 · 27/02/2016 22:10

I miss loads of people's posts as I am in lots of groups. Also I have a very busy life. It may simply be just this?

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 27/02/2016 22:09

Maybe her internet's down.

Samcro · 27/02/2016 22:00

I would expect at least a phone call from a sibling
So an email.. Nah i would not be all excited

Unflip

1 2 3

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.