to sack cleaner who went through my laundry basket?

[Noendofideas]

Long story short; new cleaner- job includes washing and ironing DC clothes. All tasks written out and agreed. Not doing a fantastic job generally but today discovered she has gone through my laundry basket and done some of my washing. Hasn't done any dc washing. I expressly said no need to touch my stuff. When asked why she said she forgot it was supposed to just be the dc washing. I am absolutely livid that she went through my laundry basket, which is full and thought this was acceptable. I want to sack her immediately but DH thinks I am being unfair and it was just a stupid mistake. Who is bu?

[godblessamerica]

had you shit yourself the day before?

[Nanny0gg]

A number of threads on here have been about intrusive mothers/mothers-in-law who have 'helpfully' done the OP's washing.

Most people have thrown up their hands in horror at the inappropriateness of it.

Don't see the difference myself.

[OfaFrenchmind2]

Do not use her service anymore. It's that simple regarding her employment status relating to you.
On the other hand, I really understand why you are pissed she did your laundry when she was not supposed to (and did not do the one she was paid to do). There are so many fabrics and clothes that can be ruined by a normal cycle in the washing machine, that she may very well have done a very expensive mistake, that she could have easily avoided.
Lot of MNetters are snippy here: "do your own washing, woman!", "why do you keep your laundry in your closet?", "You have a cleaner, you rich bint, how dare you complain?" The poor OP was not incendiary, was very reasonable in her answer, and y'all grabbed your pitchforks. I guess the educated, open-minded woman of MN is just as much of a sheep as the rest of the world, just happy to pile on people when it is socially acceptable to do it...

[WoodHeaven]

Iwant the OP already has written all her instructions down for her cleaner....

[WoodHeaven]

OK actually I can see why the OP is annoyed.
The work she was supposed to do wasn't done, ie the washing of the dcs' clothes.
She did wash the OP's clothes which means rummaging into her wardrobe ie having a nosy look into the OP's stuff. I can see how the OP could feel violated (in her privacy).

Now I still that it was mistake and she genuinely thought she was helping you (Maybe she tought your basket looked really full whereas the dcs' weren't). You need to talk to her about it

[Damselindestress]

And lots of posts on mumsnet are about first world problems!

[Damselindestress]

It could have been an accident. I would clarify that your laundry is off limits, not sack her. I wouldn't like the idea of someone going through my used undies either to be fair, it's just private to some people.

[DanglyEarOrnaments]

*either side

[DanglyEarOrnaments]

I agree with you Kewcumber laying out service boundaries comes with experience and although it is something a very lot of us have set up with a view to becoming a company or an agency, I know some cleaners are happy to just create a job for themselves or just themselves and just one assistant and leave it like that. I think every allowance should be made for the fact this lady is possibly not a professional cleaner but someone who is still learning the ropes and hasn't yet learned how to communicate effectively and listen effectively to establish these boundaries from wither side.

Although a good cleaner who knows how to operate professionally will have this all down, I know that many do not as I am sure I did not when I first set up my first cleaning business in the 1990's, it took me a few years to understand the nature of the industy, cleaners are human beings (usually) doing their best, I know I was anyway, they will learn with experience that it is a huge liability to take care of someone's home and all must be clear from the outset, preferably in writing, the cleaning element is only a part of a great cleaning service.

[celeste83]

lol at the pun iwantakitchen

[Iwantakitchen]

If she cleans many houses she might have genuinely forgotten your instructions, so write them down, either for this cleaner or the next. Personally I think you are so completely being unreasonable.

My cleaner gets written instructions every week as I need her to work on specific stuff (for example she doesn't need to clean our third bathroom every week, just after we've had guests, and she cleans widows every few weeks). Some cleaners do three houses a day so need to be reminded or get more specific instructions that's all. Not a reason to get your pants in a twist scuse the punt.

[Pipestheghost]

If the cleaner was 'snooping' she wouldn't have washed op's clothes, it sounds like the cleaner made an error. I would never sack anyone for doing my washing, ever

[celeste83]

Surely the best way to start with a stranger coming to clean your house is to sit down over a coffee and run through clearly what you want her to do what you don't want her to do. I fail to see how people get so uptight over their cleaners. They are just like me and you. I doubt they enjoy cleaning other people's houses. They probably just want to get it over with and get out asap and get paid. I doubt they want any hassel along the way.

[Kewcumber]

The cleaner was not "snooping" I'd lay bets on it - if she were snooping she'd have had a good nosey around OP's wardrobe, then gone and done the children's washing and OP would be none the wiser.

She was trying (and failing obviously) to impress the OP with her initiative.

You need to be clearer, not "no need to..." but "Please leave my clothes alone, I don;t like other people washing them or sorting through them I ALWAYS do them myself. What is important to me is that X Y and Z is done every week"

Most regular cleaners do not have such strict rules Dangley though obviously OP should as it bothers her so much. The cleaners I've had in the past have a list of what I want done every week then I leave it up to their initiative what to do on top depending on what needs doing most.

[DanglyEarOrnaments]

The problem is that cleaning is subjective, what one person deems 'a great help' another deems 'overstepping the mark'.

OP - I don't think it is bad to have private areas of the home where cleaners shouldn't go into without work in that area being booked, we don't allow the cleaning staff to go beyond the areas promised to client within our standard service, however I can understand that some self-employed cleaners (individuals I mean) have not yet learned to set out the scope of their service and what it may include in advance and shown this to the client, they should also discuss any additional areas that the client wants done and will allow them to clean at the point where the cleaner gives her quote. Therefore everyone knows where she will be going and what she will be doing and seeing and there can be no confusion.

We do not allow our cleaners to stray into areas we have not set out within our service UNLESS the client books additional work in advance so that we are all on the same page on this and do not cross any lines, plus the client is always receiving what has been agreed, booked and paid for and there is no misunderstanding or dissatisfaction. These are things you learn with experience and I am there to take care of the structure of the service in this way. This cleaner is an individual who has to find her own way and may not be aware of these subtle personal boundaries yet. She is human and she made a well-intentioned mistake through lack of experience, most people would not mind and would be pleased that she did offer additional services, such as laundry as this is not a usual service offered by cleaners.

You can't 'sack' her as you don't 'employ' her (unless, of course, you run payroll and make the necessary deductions plus keep a record of her holiday entitlements and other statutory rights). If you 'employed' her you would not get away with sacking her for this, she would need a documented verbal warning then for the next 'offence' a written warning, then a final warning (all documented and signed by her) and then you could dismiss her. However, you don't employ her so if you don't like her service, just cancel, if she has a notice period written within her service agreement you may have to have her a couple more times but otherwise you can change service providers immediately.

That is where you stand legally but I don't think this relationship will last much longer either way, cleaners tend to sense when someone is not happy with their best and unless they work for a company and their boss wishes to keep on the client they will tend to swap out the client for someone new.

[rosyvalentine]

Is it a walk-in wardrobe?

[lacktoastandtolerance]

I used to have a cleaner, and told her there was no need to do any washing up - one day we hadn't got round to doing it, and she washed up for us.

Despite this shocking incident, we decided to keep her employed.

:)

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

Do you keep your bondage gear in there, OP?
Or are you actually more bothered about the fact that the cleaner has gone into your wardrobe to find your laundry?
Is there any other reason she would have gone into your wardrobe according to your list of chores? Because if she was there for a legit reason and just saw your full laundry basket, she probably DID think she was doing you a favour; if, otoh, she had no business being in your wardrobe at all then YANB as U as first appears.

I wouldn't sack her for it though, I'd have a word first.

[gobbynorthernbird]

So, the cleaner can't follow explicit verbal and written instructions and has accessed a private area of the house? I'd be pissed off too. There's also the risk of her ruining some of the OPs clothes. Adult garments are much more likely to need special care than DC uniforms. And, yes, it's probable that there was underwear in the basket. I wouldn't want anyone going through my dirty pants.

I used to be a cleaner. I wouldn't have done this as it is unprofessional and erodes the trust the client has in both the service and the cleaner's character.

[MilkTwoSugarsThanks]

Dirty clothes in the wardrobe? Won't that make your clean clothes smell a bit dodgy?

[FireCrotch]

YABU however I agree with Cozy. It's not the first thread today that the op has held her hands up and agreed she was BU and yet the kicks kept coming. Op just tell her not to do your laundry as you like to do it all separately on a gentler wash and what not.

[BringMeTea]

I don't think yabu. Going in your wardrobe is snooping as far as I am concerned and she didn't even do the children's stuff. I wouldn't trust her.

[MistressDeeCee]

DontLaugh why should I, hmm? Im interested in the post and situation not crossing words with people who have nothing better to do than pick over what I've said in answer to a post that wasn't even made by them. You're not the OP. I have zero interest in what you think

Start your own thread if you like. In your own time . Then you can pick through the answers to your dilemma if you like. Or not as the case may be, who cares...

[Dontlaugh]

MistressDeeCee
point out what's wrong with your sentence, in your own time.

no need for you to think or have to talk and talk about it with her.

Remember during this exercise you are dealing with a human being, a sentient individual, one who can clearly follow instructions and engage her own intelligence.

Let us know how you get on.
Truly.