To think new-ish boyfriend acted in a vile fashion when in bed?

[BrokenPots]

So I have been seeing someone for the past few months. It has been going pretty well, have taken things slowly (ish). We don't live together and both have our own places. I was staying at his house for a few days recently as we both had time off work and an "incident" when were in bed has really pissed me off so in the middle of sex he basically lets rip with a massive stinking fart and proceeds to laugh about it, not in an embarrassed "oh shit, I'm sorry" laugh but genuinely thinking it's funny and making stupid comments, it was so bad I basically had to open window and then take myself to the bathroom, needless to say the mood was over for me. Then he starts acting stupid "why are you upset, couldn't help it, dodgy food" and that I am being "up-tight". FFS we are mid 30s and he was giggling like a teenage boy would when in a group of mates.

So AIBU to think this was totally unacceptable? TBH I think it showed a lack of respect and hardly conducive to me wanting to shag him any time soon.

[Libitina]

I had a terrible stomach once whilst dtd. I tried to sneak the trapped wind out but it came out massively and rippled on DH's bollocks. You'd think i'd drowned a bag of kittens.

I'm crying! Literally!

[BurntFlapjack]

I'd be pissed off too OP at the immature reaction and then giving you grief afterwords. It doesn't sound like your gastric habits and humour around them are compatible.

[MistressoftheYoniverse]

..bumstroke

Its not the fact it was a fart...yes everyone farts yada yada yada..but during a full on passionate embrace a massively loud smelly fart?...come on!...what about a loud cabbagey belch in the face?...or long green bogey slithering across your forehead?..loud spitty sneeze?...they are all equally natural ..hold that s*it down..in...up..I dunno ..

I have to say I would laugh and be utterly disgusted at the same time..he wouldn't live it down...

[Topseyt]

I once had a friend who used to refer to the relaxed nature of her relationship with her then boyfriend as "being on farting terms" with him.

I rather liked the expression, if I am honest.

It was a fart. It wasn't some terrible crime.

[TheCatsFlaps]

I hope you are as enlightened as my arsehole is droopy.

Bum stroke?

[SoWhite]

You were so incredulous as to why I can't hold mine, so I told you.

I hope you are as enlightened as my arsehole is droopy.

[donajimena]

Not that curious but thanks anyway!

[rubymallorywhite]

I don't find farting particularly comical but surely to god if you're comfortable / intimate to swap body fluids & sit on someone's penis you should be able to let it go...

Like he did...

It's definitely not just the wind that's an issue, get rid.
It's like when someone's irritating you every little thing is a hanging offence.
If you were all consumed with love, lust it wouldn't matter his pillow patter being so "guff"

Actual tears rolling down my face at poo moustache & rippling bollocks!!!

[FindoGask]

"My farts actually don't take much effort at all to expel. Years of anal sex and two horrific births have put that to bed."

Post of the year, surely.

[SoWhite]

Wow indeed. It's not usually my style to overshare so much, but donajimena did seem very curious.

[exWifebeginsat40]

wow.

[SoWhite]

My farts actually don't take much effort at all to expel. Years of anal sex and two horrific births have put that to bed.

[SoWhite]

donajimena, no of course not. Don't be so ridiculous.

Rarely does a person get surprised by a fart. In my case, I know one is coming, so I'll use the 40-or-so seconds to get myself out of the 'danger zone' - i.e., anywhere where other people will be affected.

In the case of a sticky situation, I'll excuse myself to the loo. In times when you cannot fart (like a job interview, question and answer over the desk situation) I find that I don't need to fart then.

My body is very good at responding to the situation it is in. About 95% of my farts happen at times of relaxation. High pressure situations mean I don't fart.

So yeah, if I'm on my own, I'll (to use your delicate terminology) squeeze it out.

I actually just farted whilst typing this post. So fucking what?

[donajimena]

whothefuck that is so true.. you do have to make a bit of effort to fully expel...

[donajimena]

sowhite so you just sit there squeezing them out? Yeah right..

[BolshierAryaStark]

Fuck me, laughing like a drain at some of these responses.
It is a bit grim & tbh would have killed the mood for me too but it's not the end of the world, he was probably mortified really & his reaction was due to that.

[exWifebeginsat40]

some of you sound grim.

[hoopityhoopla]

I'd find that fucking rank. But then i generally think farting is rank (except with my best mate, then it's just funny. Unless it stinks, then I go back to thinking it's rank). I was with my ex for 4 years and we never farted in front of each other (unless it was while asleep). Fanny farts don't count cos it's just air, not stinking shit air)

[WhoTheFuckIsSimon]

X post.

[WhoTheFuckIsSimon]

Well I needed to fart in the gym today and didn't. It would have smelt and it would have been loud and Id have been embarrassed.

Surely if you're in a job interview or posh restaurant you'd be able to refrain from letting rip? I can feel the need to fart but I kind of have to push the last little bit to get it to escape, so if I don't push it out it stays inside.

Dh is vegetarian and likes farting in the meat aisle in supermarkets. He reckons he wants people to think the meat stinks of shit.

[SoWhite]

Yeah. Although, I'm fairly lucky enough to do ones that never make noise and rarely smell.

[donajimena]

So you let rip in weddings funerals and job interviews do you sowhite?

[SoWhite]

I'd love to know how to keep a fart in. Never been able to. Do enlighten me.

[CurlyhairedAssassin]

Surely you non-farters in front of your partner must fart in your sleep?

I have actually woken myself or DH up in the night sometimes by a horrendously fetid fart (usually after eating baked beans!). Yes, DH might have a moan but if I'm not even aware I'm doing it then what am I gonna do? I hate to think he was finding me a turn off cos of something I can't control.

[Awoof]

Absolutely crying reading this thread. You lot are awwwful.