"Ginger boys are just ugly"

[CrumpetHead]

Just wanted to rant

Had 32wk consultant appointment today, sat in tiny waiting room with about 15 other people all crammed in and there's two women sat opposite DP and I chatting to each other, conversation goes something like "have you ever thought that your baby could be ginger" "oh god no don't say that, I wouldn't mind so much if it was a girl but ginger boys are just ugly, yuk"

DP was sat next to me and could hear the whole thing, he is ginger and so is our 14 month old DS. How rude can you get?!
DP wears a cap constantly when he's out because he got teased in school about it.

What difference does it make what colour hair you have? It's just a colour the same as brown, blonde, black are colours! Thinking about it now it's really making my blood boil and if I could turn back time I wish I'd have said something to them instead of staying quiet because I didn't want to cause an argument.
Idiots

[Mmmmcake123]

I don't want to argue that hair colour discrimination equates to racism.
There is an earlier post though that compares discrimination based on hair colour to obesity. Whilst I absolutely abhor why any person should face discrimination due to obesity, I think there is a big difference especially when talking about children.
Parents can control how much a child eats and can encourage them to exercise, both of which are healthy lifestyle options, it may not be easy for everyone but it is doable (specific medical conditions excepted).

Comparing natural hair colour to obesity as opposed to skin colour is not on in my opinion. I don't think any parent would feel comfortable telling their lil ones it's OK we can do something about your colouring, whereas eating healthily and getting more exercise is actually the norm.

BTW Mavis I love your belated comeback, I used the same at school when called fat

[originalmavis]

Just thought of a comeback for the original op! oh yes I am that fast: 'any child of yours wouldnt need to have red hair to be ugly'.

[originalmavis]

Obs, he's just reclaiming the word!

Although, the nicest thing anyone ever said to me was when I was much younger and had thick, long huge curls. I was sitting in the window of a cold coffee shop and had a big green velvet coat on with black velvet collar and trims wrapped around me. The window was square and had an ornate gold frame painted on it.

The door flew open and a man stepped in and said loudly (to me) 'I just had to tell you that you looked so exquisite framed in that window. Like a titian pre-raphaelite painting.' Then he turned and went out.

Of course he was probably a raving nutcase but still...

[Obs2015]

Ds2 is ginger-del-la-ginger. Totally.
"No", he tells people "my hair isn't red, it's ginger".

[MERLYPUSSEDOFF]

I have no experience of naturally ginger kids other than a little girl in reception at our school. (but SHE doesn't count,apparently) Oh an one of my cubs who must be about 20 now.

I think ginger is as good as the next hair colour. I especially love ginger and freckles on boys.

Perhaps you should have said 'my son can dye his hair if he wishes but no amount of education will make you anything other than an ugly ignoramus' (but you may've got punched. I'D have been raging!)


(I did use to dye my hair as bright red as I could get it if that counts)

[fakenamefornow]

CactusAnnie

I didn't say it was racism. I was picking up the pp who said that ginger haired people do not suffer discrimination in the job market

[EnthusiasmDisturbed]

Well is it

We have political parties in this country that until recently you were unable to join unless you were white European

They also have a high membership of people and those representing the party that have made racist comments and deny the Holocaust

I have never heard of families falling out or ostracising someone because their partner has red/ginger hair

That is not to deny some people with red hair are mocked/teased and that can impact their life terribly

[Helmetbymidnight]

I don't think it's insulting or offensive to call it racism. I just think it's not correct.

[Flashbangandgone]

Having ginger hair is a characteristic associated with a particular race/ethnicity, so arguably it could be called racism. It could equally be argued that it's not racism as ginger hair is not itself a race or ethnicity.

My issue is with those posts that appear to be saying that it's offensive and insulting to call it racist because it's not as severe as the racism experienced by certain ethnic groups.

[Helmetbymidnight]

No one has said its ok.

[pearpotter]

I think racism can be perpetuated by and suffered by people of any ethnicity. Obviously the prejudice suffered by non-whites is generally speaking vastly more endemic and severe. It doesn't make it ok to unfairly discriminate against, bully or tease anyone for their hair and skin colour, just because some people have it far worse.

[LookARandomName]

I'm slightly ashamed to say that, before my son was born, I was hoping he wouldn't be ginger. Not because it's "ugly" (I was a ginger boy myself - my hair has darkened since) but because I remember the bullying by both children AND adults who should know better.

[SkandiStyle]

Chris Pine is definitely red headed in Star Trek and looks bleddy lush (as he does in everything). Eric Stoltz...yes please.

I spent my early 20s during my hair several shades of auburn and yearned for natural, red, pre Raphaelite ringlets.

DD2 has always had mid brown hair, but since puberty it is definitely shading towards auburn/ chestnut and she's thrilled me too

Red heads always look so much more vital and vivid.

[Helmetbymidnight]

Why are people calling this racism?

It's stupid, nasty, bullying and prejudiced but it's not racism.

[HeteronormativeHaybales]

From my expat view, this anti-'ginger'ism is one of the most profoundly weird things about British culture (up there with the obsession with the 'property ladder' and the cost of childcare). I've always loved red hair. My dh has red body hair (blond head hair. No idea how that happens) and my first dc was born with red hair (that went blond within weeks), so I did have some hopes of redheaded children. Wasn't to be.

[fakenamefornow]

Hired less and given less job opportunities.

I heard on radio 4 a few years ago about a study that found actually people who are ginger are a lot less likely to be hired/promoted than people who aren't, in fact more than any other group. I can't remember which university did the study, it was years ago, but I'll try to find it.

[Mmmmcake123]

Just a quick aside in ref to it won't affect getting a job. It's not that I don't agree with this, but it can depend on the job. When I was younger I was given a one day trial for a Saturday job. I didn't get it even tho they were apparently desperate, I just didn't fit the look the manager wanted for his clothes empire.
Might have been my fake john lennon glasses tho lol
Tbh I don't think this would happen as much now.

[Mmmmcake123]

I hated the word ginger and told my daughter she had strawberry blonde hair; she is pale with blue eyes and very pale lashes n brows. Her beautiful hair is on the lighter side of ginger. The strawberry blonde thing didn't work. People told her she was ginger v early on and then I felt myself in a position of somehow denying it which I wasn't. She was the only redhead in school and because of this I don't think people were interested in variations lol. We embraced the term.
I don't want to annoy you cactus but you've said more than once that being ginger isn't something you can't do anything about. Pls consider what you are saying, am I supposed to tell my beautiful babes that they're ok if we just get some dye out for brows lashes and hair, maybe a bit of fake bake?
Sorry I'm becoming sarcastic again, Irreally don't mean to

[Flashbangandgone]

CherryPicking

Totally agree

This discrimination hierarchy is very strange... To take it to it's logical extreme you could say that it's 'insulting' to think black people suffer racism as if considered over the period of human history or so, the sufferings of the Jews have been far greater!.... though this of course would be preposterous and idiotic argument to make!

[BelleMairead2]

My fiancé is ginger and is the best looking man I have ever known! I'm pregnant with my first and would love a little ginger to pop out

[Gabilan]

"Racism can happen to anyone"

Prejudice can happen to anyone. I've been beaten up for my hair colour. At the time it's happening, no, you don't really distinguish between that and being beaten up for your skin colour. BUT, I also know that my job chances aren't affected by my hair colour. I'm not going to be shot for it. There's no history of anyone claiming I might be a different species and that therefore it's OK to enslave me. It's shit and it's nasty but IMO it's not racism.

[CherryPicking]

So having the crap beaten out of you for being ginger and living in daily fear of it happening as a pp's son is up thread, is somehow less serious than having the same done because of your skin tone? That's not right at all. Racism can happen to anyone.

[zippyswife]

I actually only had any negativity as an adult when I joined the police. Where all 'banter' is game. And the place was brimming with immature dicks. it bored the fuck out of me. A fellow redhead colleague pointed out that it's the last bastion of discrimination. Until that point I can only think of a handful times I was called ginge or my hair commented on in a negative way. I've always loved being a redhead.