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AIBU?

To wonder why people struggle to live in London.

466 replies

m1nniedriver · 10/10/2015 12:41

Just honestly wondering what it is about London that makes people on, as I see it, huge salaries want to live in tiny flats just because it's london? The cost of living there seems riduculous. Some of the posts on here about the cost of housing just beggars belief! A tiny 1 bedroom flat for 300k?? If that's what you want then power to you but I do see posts with people say they are struggling and stressing every day to get by. Why would you not move to another part of the country that would enable a much better quality of life?

I'm not great at putting things across on posts so I hope this doesn't offend anyone its is meant as a genuine question, not having a go.

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Siennasun · 10/10/2015 21:16

Before we had the children we rented a shoebox overlooking the docks in Canary Wharf. That was lots of fun and we loved the hustle and bustle and also being near Greenwich. Every Sunday we would walk thru the tunnel at Island Gardens and have eggs benedict and read the papers in a cafe near Cutty Sark then walk up to the observatory/wander round the old navy hospital/painted hall/potter round Greenwich market and then go home for an afternoon snooze. Aaaah those were the days.

That's the kind of lifestyle we had before kids. Smile
It was great, but it wouldn't work now we've got children. The vast majority of my friends who are still in London are childless and their lives seem very glam, but I don't really miss it and nor does my liver

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MrsKoala · 10/10/2015 21:17

Mercenary/private military companies.

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NewLife4Me · 10/10/2015 21:21

My dh quite often works in London but doesn't get the regular work there as he doesn't live there, I suppose that's an example.
He can get booked for Ronnies, a one off at Pizza Express, theatre etc but doesn't get the West End shows as he isn't local and obviously couldn't be able to make all the calls.
He usually stays with friends or travels back

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Notoedike · 10/10/2015 21:22

The job dh does isn't necessarily a London centric job but it's the hub/head quarters or most industries that he's involved with. We did consider moving to a smaller city but it's risky when the one and only emplyer goes bust - we spread our risk in London. We have both lived in other cities, quite a few other cities, so the decision has not been made without knowledge.

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MrsKoala · 10/10/2015 21:27

My exH was a very niche camera man/filmer/editor etc who specialised in filming certain facial/head/brain surgeries of specific interest and rarity. These operations only ever occurred in this country in 2 London hospitals.

I worked in Art galleries and Universities, where there were more of in London. So we decided it made sense to live in London.

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m1nniedriver · 10/10/2015 21:28

Walford that in itself is reason enough to not want to live there sarcasm before anyone gets too upset

idi57I think where I live is the best place in the world, I'm sure most adults who are settled and content feel like that. I've enjoyed holidays in London but I wouldn't like to live there, same as I'm sure you'd hate it living here.

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Jux · 10/10/2015 21:28

I lived in central London for years, 25+, and never really wanted to leave. I still miss it dreadfully.

I could take dd to galleries, museums, exhibitions, concerts, films, shows, street theatre, you name it. Here, well we can go to the shops. Once in a while the local film club show something but it's for adults not kids. There are no musical opportunities here, except I believe a ukulele orchestra has started recently. I have sung in amateur choirs in London which have gone all over the world to sing at festivals of one sort or another. My childhood church choir in London had conductors who became famous, it was a sought after position.

That's just one aspect of living in London with children. The opportunities are endless.

Obviously there's a downside, and who knows that dd wouldn't have gone down that route. I do kind of wish she'd had the chance though.

Mind you dh hates London with a passion, so we'd never have stayed there.

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Preminstreltension · 10/10/2015 21:30

My job doesn't exist outside London (very particular part of finance). It doesn't really exist outside of London and New York and possibly Hong Kong/Singapore.

I was born here, all my family are here. I love it here.

I am lucky to have bought a flat in 1998 so I hopped on the last bus to homeownership in London. If I had to buy my house now I'd need a mortgage for 15 times my salary Confused.

Also bringing up children in C London is fab. We have hardly any space but we hardly ever need to get in the car, we walk everywhere, they have access to amazing things to see and do all the time.

Downside: pollution, homelessness (particular problem with Roma in my area which is pretty bad), expense, overburdened local services esp GPs serving a primarily transient population in this particular area. But not enough to force me out...

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longestlurkerever · 10/10/2015 21:33

As for jobs, I'm a government lawyer. I work on new laws going through parliament and advise ministers on legal risk. I love it. I could do a version of my job outside London but it would mean, for example, spending the rest of my career in the health and safety executive's office in Bootle, rather than having the run of Whitehall. It wouldn't be the same.

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longestlurkerever · 10/10/2015 21:40

And actually I've found London has come into its own with children. I find it difficult to entertain my dds just hanging round the house but this weekend we're off to see two puppet shows. Last weekend we went to a museum I'd never been to and q workshop in the woods. On Monday dd1 had a half day and we went to the south bank. We went to visit a friend who moved to commutersville when she had children and there was one playground and that was more or less it.

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StellaAlpina · 10/10/2015 21:42

Some jobs are only in London AND you have to physically be within X miles of your workplace. Im thinking mainly of medical things, some things are only done at a few major hospitals and when you are on call you have to be ably to get there in 20ish minutes.

Also tube/train workers! You can't very well get a train in if you're the person in charge of the first train in the morning Grin

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MarshaBrady · 10/10/2015 21:43

I've found it really good for children too. Just exploring, going on buses - sitting at the front at the top is fun for them and me

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Shutthatdoor · 10/10/2015 21:45

just exploring, going on buses - sitting at the front at the top is fun for them and me

They exist out of London too Wink

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FrancesHaHa · 10/10/2015 21:46

We live in a 2 bed flat, no garden, on an estate, working in not very high paid public/ charity sector jobs. I know we could probably get a large house with a garden in the city I grew up in, but I wouldn't do it.

  • choice of jobs and being able to get work quickly when one job ends
  • loads of green spaces - big park down the road more than makes up for the lack of garden for me. Plus I like the social ness of the park
  • not having to drive. I hate driving, but get frustrated by lack of public transport when I go elsewhere.
  • loads for kids to do. They seem to be constantly going on school trips to interesting (free) museums, plus plenty for us to do on weekends.


Also, I live in what could be described as a 'grotty' or 'crime ridden' area but never had any problems nor have my neighbours.
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MarshaBrady · 10/10/2015 21:48

Sure - but I still find that journey over the river marvellous. I did grow up in a town of 2000 people. The difference still amazes me.

And it was idyllic but other end of the spectrum.

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BalloonSlayer · 10/10/2015 21:54

There was an article in the Times magazine last week about the revolting house share the journalist has to live in, all because she is living in London. She and her boyfriend were despairing of ever being able to scrape together the deposit to buy a £350,000 one bed flat in London. She mentioned that they had talked about moving to Brighton, but house prices are just as bad there.

But the thing is: you can buy a 3 bedroom house half way between London and Brighton, on a fast train line to both, for £350,000. So, a one bed flat would be about £200,000 - well affordable from the details she mentioned in the article. But that just didn't seem to have occurred to them. It was Trendy London or Trendy Brighton and waaah waaah waaah about how they couldn't afford either, and them having slugs on the walls. Confused

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Siennasun · 10/10/2015 21:55

I'm taking DS for his first trip to London in a couple of weeks. I'm really excited about it. I agree that there's lots of brilliant things for kids to do in London.
We have lots of stuff for kids where we live too. Museums, kids theatre, workshops etc also exist outside of London Wink

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JassyRadlett · 10/10/2015 21:56

Jassy/ others it's fine to say 'in my personal experience so far London is the part of the uk I found it easiest to settle

Fair enough, I guess, but it's also the place in the UK I've felt most welcome, and least 'other' - which is quite different. And I don't think it's offensive to say that, or to make decisions on where to live based in part on that experience.

I'm not forcing anyone else to Smile

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elQuintoConyo · 10/10/2015 22:02

We struggled. So we moved to Barcelona Grin

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Lightbulbon · 10/10/2015 22:27

It's pretty offensive to people raising families in other uk cities to say that London offers more to do with dcs at the weekend.

London has nothing to match Edinburgh in August when the festivals are on for example.

Also the op was about struggling families in London. They are hardly likely to be able to afford the expensive opportunities rich Londoners exploit.

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ouryve · 10/10/2015 22:31

Just exploring, going on buses - sitting at the front at the top is fun for them

DS1 and I spend most Saturdays exploring on buses. Today we bought arriva passes that we could have used all the way from Scarborough to Berwick, but since we were avoiding Newcastle, which happened to be hosting a major international sporting event with odd shaped balls, today, we travelled to Middlesbrough, then Darlington, then Bishop Auckland, then home again, via Durham.

No double decker uses were involved, today, mind, but we don't sit at the front of the top deck, anyhow, since that is truly horrible when it goes wrong. That said, the top deck of a bus is bloody brilliant on some of the more scenic, hilly routes in Co Durham. Quite breathtaking, at times.

Last week, we did catch lots of double deckers, last week, and did brave the rugby traffic and got to see those poppies that millions of people flocked to London to see, last year. With our own regional spin on them. And we didn't have to queue for ages to get near them.

To wonder why people struggle to live in London.
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FrancesHaHa · 10/10/2015 22:38

There is lots of free things for kids in London. Not just the big museums, but often lots of local events/ museums/ festivals as well. Plus bus fares are free for kids too, which makes it easier.

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Goldenbear · 10/10/2015 22:38

I was born in Greenwich, my DH was born in Camden, his family are Jewish and they have very strong ties to parts of North London as a result. For his grandparents it was where they felt part of the community. Both our roots are very much in London but unfortunately, unlike some very lucky posters, a 'struggle' to remain/return to where you're from, was/is not an option. It is not so much a struggle as an impossibility!

I work part time and DH is an Architect but we still can't afford it, however important our 'roots' are, it doesn't pay the mortgage- believe it or not!

My brother is a very high earner but his house in North London doesn't particularly stand out. There are two homes along his street of Edwardian terraces that just sit empty as they're owned for investment reasons only. It makes a relatively normal part of North London suburbs appear a bit soulless tbh. When we visit we take the children to Alexander Palace park and the atmosphere is definitely a bit dead. Expensively kitted out children with their expensively kitted out parents. London is not like the one I grew up in, it lacks diversity because of all the wealth and consequently is a bit bland.

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MotherOfFlagons · 10/10/2015 22:40

Newlife4me Sort of, but in banking and finance there are a lot of jobs which simply don't exist in other industries or outside London, unless it's in other major financial centres. It's hard to explain without going into outing specifics, but my job is very particular to the banking sector. It's taken me a number of years to gain the experience and knowledge and they aren't transferable to, say, a biscuit factory in Birmingham.

Do I feel trapped? Yes, sometimes. And there is the underlying concern that if I got made redundant it would be hard to find another job.

But when I see the lights of London on a clear night, or walk across London Bridge, or watch a tiny theatre company putting on a play in a church, or eat my lunch in a beautiful park, or hear a tube driver make jokes to passengers, or any one of the small things that you come across every day, it makes up for the crappy things. I came here 20 years ago and it's become my home.

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Goldenbear · 10/10/2015 22:41

Sorry - 'Alexandra' not the above!

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