AIBU to think that girl's school shoes should be enclosed?

[jwpetal]

sorry this is long but My daughters are starting reception on Thursday and I took them to get new school shoes. I went to Clarks who did not have any enclosed shoes for girls. They did have a new shoe for older children but not for young children. Apparently, parents do ask for this but they do not supply them. I looked at numerous stores and could not find them except for Little Kickers that I might get away with but massively expensive.

Now, the boys have enclosed shoes but not girls. Winter is coming and the kids will spend a lot of time outside in rain, puddles and the cold. When I asked about this (I grew up in the desert), a young girl next to me said that her feet get wet and cold but they are also not allowed to wear boots. She was buying the new Clarks enclosed shoe for older kids. Her mother was surprised as she had not thought of it. Her brother said that his feet stayed dry....except when he jumps in a big puddle.

Am i being unreasonable, to find the policy of no boots rule unreasonable and also the lack of supply to girls for warm, comfortable, enclosed school shoes ridiculous?

[ladybirdandsnails]

It's total rubbish that fit is different as the foot gauges are unisex!!!! I also drop off and DP pick up and both work so wearing wellies to walk to school and constantly change is ridiculous. Our school also play out in all weathers and spend a lot of time in out door classroom...

[Dragonlette]

Winifred - she seemed to think they were wider, which for us is a GOOD thing because both my dds have stupidly wide feet. I don't understand why boys' shoes should be wider though, surely they should all be the same size if they're sold as the same size.

[MushroomSoup]

DD's school ask us to provide plimsols for indoor use and the children change into them when they arrive. We send DD in her wellies when the weather is bad and trainers when it's fine - no need to buy expensive school shoes that don't do the job!

[WinifredTheLostDenver]

Yy dragon - it's not like the old "slider and gripper" foot gauges came in pink and blue...

I can believe that there might be more boy stock in an H width and more girl stock in a D, or something, but not that an E is different between the two.

[ElephantsNeverForgive]

Why it's so vital to a child's education to wear "school shoes" I really don't understand.

Why they can't wear any kind of boots, black trainers, shoes or sandals, so long as they don't have high heels, slippy soles and stay on
I really don't know.

I managed to get a decent education without owning any black shoes until 6th form.

[donteattheplaydough]

Agree. My DD has wide feet with high insteps, and Clarks were always the worst, the styles were always too narrow. She could never wear the Mary Jane style because of the shape of her feet it would cut into the top of her foot. Very often the shop wouldn't even have her width anyway. Loads of mums I speak to have this problem but when I emailed Clarks they said they didn't produce as many shoes to fit wide feet as there 'wasn't the demand'.

I have always had to go to small independent shoe shops to get anything to fit. More expensive of course...

DS has exactly the same shape feet. We've had no problem getting him shoes to fit - because the boys shoe styles are much more practical.

Camper seem to have some nice little ankle boots?

Fortunately DDs school allows them to wear boots so I go for those.

I want her to have shoes she can do anything in. I am always amazed in the summer by some of the flimsy sandals girls wear. My DD has practical sandals for school, and a nice 'impractical' pair of sandals for parties that I let her choose.

[donteattheplaydough]

www.gentlyelephant.co.uk/shoes/girls/camper-sella-plum-vulk-suri-punk-suri.html

This is the kind of girls shoe I like.

[donteattheplaydough]

www.petasilkidsshoes.com/girls/products/autumn-winter-2014/girls-aw-2014-dream-20739.php

And these are the ones DD had. No uniform at her school so colour didn't matter, but I don't understand why you couldn't get these in black, they would seem to be ideal.

[donteattheplaydough]

Sorry link didn't work. Try again
media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/c9/e0/a2/c9e0a24d3708cc5b8a2445db8d6578ef.jpg

They are Petasil.

[SomethingOnce]

Oh god, YANBU.

What's wrong with a sensible unisex ankle boot (Velcro please, for Nursery and Reception if you're reading this, retailers) when they're little and active?

DD scoots the school run and wore out sturdy Kickers pretty fast; those flimsy little Mary Janes have no fucking chance.

[Blondieminx]

YANBU at all.

The design of Clarks shoes for girls would indicate we never have wet, cold weather in this country but given their current management/advertising have we any hope of encouraging them to change?

Another one here with a DD with VERY narrow feet so we struggle to buy high street :( pah!

[ladybirdandsnails]

Somethingonce we do school scoot or cycle run too in all weathers as do 80 percent of our school. Thankfully they really don't bother what shoes you have. So much more sensible. I don't get parents that have DD dressed in flimsy ballet pumps and sandals and then let them do stuff as they don't have appropriate shoes !!! If DDs are dressed in trousers and enclosed shoes they can stay warm and dry too

[flavourflave]

doc martin school shoes

[flavourflave]

mark.reevoo.com/reevoomark/en-GB/product?sku=15378001&trkref=DRM&__utma=1.228006436.1410159679.1410159679.1410159679.1&__utmb=1.16.0.1410159711993&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1410159679.1.1.utmcsr=google.co.uk|utmccn=(referral)|utmcmd=referral|utmcct=/&__utmv=-&__utmk=261950477

[QueenTilly]

Although I don't have a daughter, , I have noticed this for myself every time I go to Clarks. It horrifies me, as I am well accustomed to walking outside in England! You would never catch me wearing open shoes between October and April for a morning walk to work/school/wherever, and it baffles me that there is so little choice in enclosed shoes for school shoes.

I wouldn't want to be faffing around with wellies at the school gate for my sons- it's a long enough walk as it is!

[ElephantsNeverForgive]

I had DDs climbing trees in ballet pumps, because there was absolutely no alternative, except boys shoes. Even at 4.5 my DDs would have refused to wear those.

And it's no good saying, but your the parent. DD2 would have ran out the shop if asked to try on boys shoes. It would have required a level of violence that would have rightly warranted SS involvement to get her to put them on. They would have been off again in the car.

Unless schools start mandating enclosed shoes, manufacturers aren't going to make them and girls aren't going to see their peers wearing them and accept them for themselves.

Same goes for adult women. Smart office wear is still practical comfortable shoes for men and court shoes, often with heels for women.

Hence the huge number of women who's working uniform is black trousers and ankle boots , to try and level things just a bit.

[SomethingOnce]

I'm going to get flamed for this, but it annoys me that parents who care more that their DD's look pwetty, than that they're comfortable and can be active, seem to set the tone.

I want DD to be comfortable and active, but I don't want her to feel out of step with her peers either.

[zoemaguire]

Elephants, there are absolutely alternatives, certainly for a 4.5yo! You do have to seek them out though. The internet has loads of possibilities, and often at good prices too - tkmaxx for instance sometimes carry bobux or primigi shoes for a fraction of their original cost, and loads of places stock european makes like ricosta. We just bought some sturdy pippo shoes for dd1 for 22 quid, reduced from 45. You have to take a bit of a gamble on the sizing (though they are usually returnable), but better that than ballet pumps!

[halfdrunkcoffee]

At DS's school they wear wellies when they go outside in the colder months, which seems more sensible.

Failing that, could your DD wear boys' shoes? There might be some better options online.

[unlucky83]

YANBU - luckily my primary aged DD can wear trainers - and she does. They wear gym shoes inside and I can't see the point of girly shoes for them to wear outside at playtime playing football...and the boys shoes are often more like trainers - sensible shoes for active DCs - but they often are 'obviously' boys - like PPs have said leave DDs open to peer ridicule.
(MY DD1 wore school sweatshirts/jumpers - preferred them - then at about 7 she realised they were in the boy's section- had a blue label and she didn't want to wear them anymore )
What used to really really annoy me in Clarks was at one point all their girls trainers were white and pink ...on DD1 they would be filthy the first day she wore them .. then they had one darker style - recently I noticed they had improved slightly...
DD2 is now wearing 'girls' geox trainers - navy blue with purple trim ....

[ElephantsNeverForgive]

My DDs are much older now and I agree it is getting slightly better, but the Web really isn't the answer for DD1 who is incredibly fussy that her shoes are comfortable and has different sized feet.

Also DD2 hates standing out, so unless there had been a general move form the rest of the girls to wear sensible shoes, she would, as I said above, simply not cooperate.

Sadly, I suspect, Clarks make a huge profit on their awful tatty pumps and in a semi rural area it is probably the only thing keeping our small town shops open.

[MuddlingMackem]

ElephantsNeverForgive Mon 08-Sep-14 12:22:13

Same goes for adult women. Smart office wear is still practical comfortable shoes for men and court shoes, often with heels for women.

Hence the huge number of women who's working uniform is black trousers and ankle boots , to try and level things just a bit.

[Doodledot]

I looked at Clarks girls shoes on line yesterday - they are all really flimsy !! I really don't get it at all

[Firsttimer7259]

Dd has sn so no opposition from her on shoes which makes it easier. Last winter I bought boys boots. Totally fine about them when I bought them - felt a bit self -conscious when other parents or toddlers noticed.
This year she's started school - so I've stepped up my hunt for sturdy grippy but still girl shoes and found one pair at verbaudet. I also don't understand why girls shoes should be such flimsy crap.

[Doodledot]

I have just ordered my DD some fabulous black patent ankle boots from M&S - brilliant for school. Similar to boys shoes but girly. Similar to the start rite ones but funky recommend