to tell neighbours to wash their DCs hands because

[canyou]

The stone gravel from my flower beds that are part of my drive that their children were throwing around were covered in chickken shit and round up.
The DC are small under 3 and the 2 Mums just stood chating on my drive They did not know I was at home because my car was in the parking bay as I was killing weeds on the drive with vinegar not round up
They were cross that I might have harmed their DC and that the prickles on the rose bush hurt a DC when he tried to pick it, Why do they think I planted the rose bush Yes I am evil

[Sazzle41]

Just say oh thought you should know the local cats all wee & poo in that gravel, what can you do he? ...Job done.

[pieinthesky123]

Voodoo lilies - they stink of rotting meat but look ok. Should keep the kids and their gossiping mums away from your drive.

[Passthecake30]

Tip a big bag of gravel on their driveways as a "gift"

[CalamitouslyWrong]

Can you not just put up a fence?

[WitchWay]

Back to the original point about hand washing because of chicken shit - why do they need to be told about that?

[MargotLovedTom]

Ferocious, snarling, hungry dog on a chain, patrolling the driveway?

[Stratter5]

Pyrocanthus. Or hawthorn. Make a lovely, thick hedge. Spent the weekend hedge trimming, and my God those are two bastard evil plants.

[DogCalledRudis]

Cat poo!

[CeliaBowen]

I mean dammit not because you are right but because it would be fairer to say the DC got their just reward for being a pest!

[CeliaBowen]

steeleye I thikn Frank was getting confused with the fact that "Trespassers will be prosecuted" is incorrect. Thanks for standing up for me! You are of course right about occupiers liability dammit

Loving the swearing gnomes!

[Patrickstarisabadbellend]

Grow loads of nettles and remove all dock leaves....

[Patrickstarisabadbellend]

Yes!

[JudysPriest]

I'm with Patrick.

Failing gnomes, get some of those Weeping Agnel things then invite them in for a Dr Who day. They'll never leave the house again.

[Staywithme]

Put some cat poo down. Guarantee when they dig that up their dms will stop them playing there. I have six cats and could post some down to you. Is there any duty in cat poo?

[WitchWay]

Bamboo & string prob not strong enough

You can get hedging roses with big thorns

[Patrickstarisabadbellend]

Trim your rose bush and accidentally chop all the kids hair off.

[canyou]

Witch, no fence but could I grow them along bamboo and stringI just pulled all my peas/beans so have both-
MrsT no water motion we r getting water meters in Irl I am on water conservation and have 3 butts to water the garden but cannot waste it on DC

[MrsTerryPratchett]

You could get one of those motion activated water sprayers for 'animals' on your property...

[WitchWay]

Have you a fence in the front where you could plant a climbing rose? No? an obelisk perhaps?

American Pillar is beautiful and has lots of really huge fuck off thorns

[ChickenMe]

Lol at the mum getting upset about a rose bush.

Next stop - Venus fly trap. Triffid. Sundew. You need an arsenal of inappropriate carnivorous angry plants.

[WitchWay]

The mums let their children dig up your gravel with tractors & diggers???

[canyou]

Zen, kicking stones oh no if only,they use pedal tractor and digger I guess that is the attraction of the stones, TBH I only know them to say hello, My DC are not their age group
Steely I promise not to harm the DC --the garden is kept safe for my DC.
Happy, baby fluffy chicks would do the job, I might get some and then pass them onto my DSis when they are not so cute and fluffy and the Mums hand them back

[HappySeaTurtles]

Get some chocolate covered coffee beans. Every time they come over, give them some. Give them some free chicks or cute baby animals. Enough times of having to pry candy, and baby animals out of her children's hands, she'll make sure they stay away from you.

Make her the bad guy, not you.

[SteeleyeSpanx]

FrankSaysNo

You are talking nonsense, of course there is the tort of trespass, both to land and to the person.

Unfortunately, OP does have a duty of care to trespassers under the Occupiers Liabilities Act(s), so better be careful that the little horrors haven't suffered any actual harm.

[ZenNudist]

It's just common decency not to stand on your neighbours property, regardless whether they're home or not. Wrecking your garden by kicking your gravel is really rude. I'm surprised they didn't apologise. Are they usually so ill mannered?