To be absaloutely terrified of the sleepless nights again...

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

I am really broody and me and dh are trying for another baby (dd is one)

However, after a few sleepless nights with a poorly dd, I have been subjected to the misery once again of lack of sleep. Quite frankly I am scared I wont be able to do this all again?

Dd is generally a good sleeper and has been from around 7 months.

The hardest part of the newborn phase was the lack of sleep. I am so desperate for another dc, but I do feel terrified about havin to cope with two dc and no sleep.

I realise women do it everyday around the world, I have mates who can cope fine with sleep deprivation- but I literally felt ill and low When I had it. I know it is fr such a relatively short time though, so AIBU to be so scared?

[WillSingForCake]

Ah, congrats!! You will be fine!

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Thanks chief
Well I am pregnant again! So better hope yous are all telling the truth!!!
Pleeeease!

[Chiefsquawtbt]

For what it's worth DDs slept thru from 6 weeks and 8 weeks, we had strict routines and left them to cry - it worked. Don't hate me tho as they're both teenagers now and (believe me) I'd take sleepless nights with babies over any of the shit fun and games they've put me thru in the past year!

[WillSingForCake]

I think what you have to remember is the sleepless nights phase is relatively short in the grand scheme of things. I know when you're going through it it drags on, but if you look at it as a percentage of your life it's just a blink of an eye!

[sleepdodger]

I understand entirely
It was 2 years before I got any decent sleep and it has significantly impacted on my willingness or not to ttc again. And then I re read that and am super sad
And then we have a random dodgy ie sleepless night and its like ds knows we're thinking about it

[Chipandspuds]

You're not alone OP! I'm only 9 weeks pregnant with dc2 and the lack of sleep has crossed my mind I must admit!

I am planning to formula feed and DH can do the last feed of the evening and I'll do the middle of the night feed and early morning feed. DS will be at nursery 2 days a week so those can be my lazy days! And this time around I am at least prepared and I know it won't last forever! With poor DS I just felt in shock about the whole experience!

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Yeh I am not a fan either ... I think some love who have a text book newborn bitter

[WillSingForCake]

I'm with you. I have a 2.7 yr old DD and a 2 week old DS, and the sleep deprivation is a killer. DD slept through from 3 months though, so am hoping DS will do similar. I really struggle with the newborn phase, can't believe some people love it!

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Aww thankyou fluffy ! I am deffo like you/ I can cope with it all, but lack of sleep is torture!
Your post gives me hope!

[fluffyraggies]

OP i know exactly how you feel. For me the.single.worst.thing about having babies/small DCs is disturbed sleep.

Years of: nappies, social restrictions, mess and equipment round the house, no time to yourself, school and nursery runs, 'family' holidays, cars full of baby car seats, the sheer burden of responsibility for raising a baby to adulthood .... all these for me are mere trifles.

BUT

wake me up in the bloody night and god help you!

I'm on no.4 DC now OP, and all of them good sleepers. 8/9 hours per night from 6/7 weeks old. Breast fed. None of them were/are good 'nappers' during the day though.

You'll be fine. Routine, routine, routine.

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

ssj3 yes I can cope with once or twice. I will def be vigilant with a routine :)

saggy and forgettable - you lucky swines!
Secrets please ?!

madsening thats sounds like a plan (pre school)

techno aww, I empathise :) my dd slept better than that, but I had pnd too and couldn't sleep even when she did due to pnd ...

[SS3J]

I was terrified too, after feeling like I was going to die from sleep deprivation with my first. I decided to do things a bit differently this time. Have more of a routine (especially for feeds) and so far it has totally paid off. DC2 is 100 times easier than his sister ever was and of course I am up in the night to feed (like now!) But it's once or twice rather than 6 or 8 times. I can cope with that! Good luck!

[Forgettable]

Yes, DS2 slept through 10-6 from 10 weeks. He was BF as well.

[SaggyAndLucy]

you might get a good sleeper. dd slept overnight from day 3!

[maddening]

At least this time you can prepare as you know what to expect - it hits you like a train first time round but now you can set up your bedroom etc for the long nights etc and if dd is 2 when the future dc arrives get a few mornings of preschool going to give you nap time in the mornings.

[JonesRipley]

I have 2 BTW

[JonesRipley]

YANBU

It's hard but at least you'll get that phase over with quickly.

I couldn't have another because I could't go back there.

Some people cope better on broken sleep than others.

[technosausage]

My dd (3 weeks) is turning out to be just like her brother, he never slept for longer than 45 mins until he was 6 months old I don't cope well on broken sleep and did suffer from pnd, I used to write down how long he would sleep for. I've learnt to just accept it this time, sleep will happen just not right now. I've got to cope because I don't have a choice with a toddler and a newborn.

[Inglori0us]

It is bleak. I can't sugar coat it.
My dd (just turned 2) slept through with a dreamfeed from 3 months. I now also have a 15 day old ds who wants to feed every 2 hours. I feel like a zombie.
But, it won't last forever and it is worth it overall.

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Is it Mintyy? When she barely napped? According to my friends and fam that is fairly normal...

[badidea]

DS2 is 10.5 months so I can remember the newborn sleepless nights and to be honest it really isn't that bad. I've never really understood how obsessed whiny parents get about sleep and lack thereof. DS1 never slept through until he was 2.5yrs, you suck it up and you cope.

I love the newborn stage, lack of sleep would never put me off, not when you have a snuggly, curled up, gorgeous smelling baby in your arms

..yeah, maybe I'm a bit broody too.....

[Mintyy]

But sleeping through reliably from 7 months or so is a very good sleeper!

I'd wait a bit longer to ttc if you are in so much dread about more sleepless nights.

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Obviously dd did nap occasionally- but It was never for long. It used to really enrage me when people would talk about newborns being easy 'as all they do is sleep...'
I hope my next dc is a newborn of that variety!
Not that I would change my dd of course :)

[Purplepoodle]

Yanbu. I have a pathological dread of the first 8 months or so as mine don't sleep. All you can do is put mechanisms in place to deal with it. If you can afford daycare for your older child or if a friend or relative is willing to help out with childcare while you catch up on sleep it can make all the difference.

[WineSpider]

My DD is 6 months old and I'm slowly coming round to the idea of having another baby in the future.

I agree that those early days were just so awful that it really puts me off ever doing it again. Friends who are on number two say that it isn't as bad as you think - you know what you're doing, you have less to give up in terms of lifestyle, lie ins etc and it's such a short time in the grand scheme of things.

It must be otherwise everyone would stop at one, right?!