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AIBU?

To be sick of trying to lose weight and wonder if I should just accept myself as I am?

84 replies

JulietBravoJuliet · 17/10/2013 14:07

I'm 5ft 7in, weigh 13st 12lb and I'm a size 16 (14 in a lot of trousers/jeans etc but big busted!). I'm not enormous by any standards. I feel like I've been on a diet of some description for most of my adult life, and I really, really struggle to lose weight. I have an under active thyroid, which, although I'm on drugs for, seems to slow my metabolism down, and I have to eat very carefully to drop a few pounds. I've lost just over a stone and a half with SW since May, but have now hit a standstill. I calorie track as well using MFP and I'm genuinely not overheating yet I'm struggling to drop anymore, and I hate the thought that if I manage to lose more, I'll have to "diet" for the rest of my life to maintain it.

Today, so far, I have eaten:
Banana and yoghurt for breakfast
Cup of tea
Small brown roll with boiled egg, lettuce, tomato, cucumber and onion for lunch followed by some grapes and an apple
In the slow cooker, I have some soup - 2 rashers of bacon chopped up, onions, carrots, lentils, garlic, leeks, celery and tinned tomatoes. I will eat some of this for tea with some naan bread croutons and have made a sugar free jelly with raspberries which I will have with some raspberry sorbet.
I'll perhaps have another banana, or maybe 2 weetabix and raisins at about 8pm if I'm peckish.

This is a fairly typical day and I don't think it's that bad? I eat chocolate probably 3 times a week, but tend to buy a little Freddo or a small Milky Bar, and have a couple of glasses of wine on a weekend. We have pasta 2 or 3 times a week, plenty of fruit and veg and I eat very little bread (never white as it bloats me).

I'm about ready to give up and just accept that I'll be fat forever! So frustrated!

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JulietBravoJuliet · 20/10/2013 16:41

Yes it's the dieting forever thing that's getting me down! I know I need to be healthy, but I need to enjoy life as well, and I get great enjoyment out of food :)
I will certainly get my levels checked out, and read up more on helping my condition, plus supplements, as I feel it's all linked. In the meantime, I think I'm going to stop the diet and work on liking myself a little more!
Back seems to be improving; I'm more mobile today definitely, so fingers crossed I'll be able to get a bit more active soon!

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Rufus44 · 20/10/2013 16:15

You could be me! Same height and nearly same weight. Just had my thyroxine increased as to be healthy someone with an already damaged thyroid should be at about 1 not just under 5!

Really interesting articles about it on some of the thyroid s websites. I can't say I have lost weight but it is easier to maintain

I really struggle with low carb as I am veggie, and I also get fed up a the idea of "dieting" for the rest of my life! I am just trying to stay at a realistic weight, I used to weigh 9 bloody stone!!!!! I'm never seeing that again!

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GatoradeMeBitch · 20/10/2013 15:14

Oh, and some people swear by eating a couple of brazil nuts everyday, because lack of selenium can be an issue too!

If your GP agrees to it, broad spectrum blood tests are a good idea - including iron, ferritin, vitamin B12 and vitamin D. The people on the health unlocked thyroid board are great at interpreting results.

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GatoradeMeBitch · 20/10/2013 14:59

If you decide on magnesium supps, magnesium citrate is the best kind. I take Lamberts MagAbsorb, but Nature's Best are good too. (Holland & Barrett supplements are not that good generally, and they often use soya as an ingredient which is bad for underactive thyroids.) It's best taken about an hour before bed, and calcium helps it absorb so I usually eat a small yoghurt at the same time.

And I'm taking a Solgar Gentle Iron tablet with a glass of orange juice because the vit c helps iron absorption. With iron you have to remember not to take it on an empty stomach, and to keep it at least a few hours away from your thyroxine (same goes for calcium).

I hope this might help, and I hope you feel better soon!

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JulietBravoJuliet · 20/10/2013 10:33

GatoradeMeBitch that's a very interesting theory and certainly something I hadn't thought of :) My doctor actually mentioned the possibility of FM a few months ago, as I get a lot of aches and pains, extreme fatigue, headaches, IBS type problems and trouble sleeping, but they didn't suggest checking it out further.

My back, this time, is a slipped disc caused by lifting and sneezing at the same time, but it was aching before I did that and I should've really stopped before it got as bad as it did.

I will certainly look into supplements :)

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GatoradeMeBitch · 20/10/2013 01:10

I may well be adding two and two and making five OP, because I don't know the reason for your bad back, but if it is muscle tension/spasm, that is actually a common symptom of under-treated hypothyroidism.

The cause isn't entirely clear but some people theorize that levothyroxine leaches certain minerals from your body over time, and they say that magnesium supplements help a lot, some people say it's an iron deficiency. Or sometimes it can be fibromyalgia, that's connected to low thyroid and causes back pain.

I saw osteopaths and chiropractors for my spasming neck muscles for months, but supplementing made the difference in the end.

But maybe it's a coincidence in your case and you injured it another way. I'm afraid I sound like a mad woman whose answer to every health problem is 'It's your THYROID!!!' But I thought I would pass the information along just in case Smile

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JulietBravoJuliet · 20/10/2013 00:18

At the minute, I can't afford much to be honest. I'm struggling to pay the chiropractor as I'm not getting any sick pay :( Ironically, I've been looking for a horse share for a while now, and this week, I've had two different people ring me asking if I'm interested in riding their horses! Sod's law!

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Morloth · 20/10/2013 00:15

Stop dieting.

Start exercising, especially weight work.

You might not lose weight but you will feel fantastic and you will eat more protein and less carbs by default because that is what your body will demand for muscle building/toning.

Can you find/afford a personal trainer who can help strengthen your back? Yourcchiropractor can probably recommend someone.

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PrimalLass · 19/10/2013 23:54
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PrimalLass · 19/10/2013 23:52

I'm not sure if anyone else has said this, but if you have an underactive thyroid you should be cutting back on carbs and avoiding gluten if possible.

I am the same, and should practise what I preach...

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JulietBravoJuliet · 19/10/2013 23:48

I'm looking forward to getting mobile again so as I can do some exercise; it's driving me mad being like this! I just want to feel comfortable in my skin. Tonight, for example, I've been to a friends in the village for dinner. There was 7 of us there in total, all close friends who do this often. I struggled with the sitting down lark due to my back, but all I could think about all night was if my belly was sticking out, and how fat and clumsy I felt. That's what I need to get rid of; not necessarily the belly but the paranoia that I look like crap. All the people I was with have seen me regularly and couldn't give a shit how I look. I know this yet I still feel awkward :(

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persimmon · 19/10/2013 17:01

You're not much heavier and the same height as me OP, and when I joined SW two people in the queue asked me why I was there. I feel your pain, though. I'm 1.5 stones heavier than before I had DS and I know I look much more buxom and 'hippy', and I no longer wear jeans or trousers. Sad
I'm now 43 and have decided to focus on health and general wellbeing rather than size. I've just booked my first spinning class (beginners!) and intend to walk a LOT more than I currently am.

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specialsubject · 19/10/2013 16:52

with your medical issues it is always going to be difficult. Is there any chance of stabilising your thyroid problem?

there are some cons in your food intake though. Yogurt is a treat, not an everyday food - it is full of sugar, especially the low-fat varieties. Try muesli or porridge. Also raisins are very very sugary. You look short on complex carbs.

but given your health problems, you aren't doing badly at all.

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CaptainTripps · 19/10/2013 16:35

I've done it. I've lost a good bit of weight. Took 2 years. The key for me was exercise and portion control.
I do advise you to dump the milky ways and have a really good quality chocolate in the fridge with high cocoa content. Have a couple of squares to get rid of the chocolate craving. It won't leave you wanting more.
Bread rolls are a waste of calories. Like someone else said, they are at least 150 cals. I must have my bread but I have the Hovis small loaf - 50 cals per slice.
I don't think you should stop calories counting. Well - just be aware of what you are ingesting. I have a rough idea as with the bread example above. It doesn't mean you are obsessing over it.
I agree you should have your treats once a week.
Up your protein and lower your carbs.

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JulietBravoJuliet · 19/10/2013 16:11

Hi :) thanks for all the replies!
badguider I'm seeing a chiropractor and it's making the world of difference! Expensive, but cheaper than being off work for weeks!

I shall check out these book recommendations :)

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badguider · 19/10/2013 14:50

IMO and experience people who participate in sport (rather than "exercise") always look and more importantly feel better than those of the same size/weight as those who don't.

Not sure what treatment you're getting for your back but I swear by the value of private Physio (usually about £40) where you can get a programme to prepare and strengthen for riding again.
Focus on what your body can do rather than what it looks like and you will feel better, carry yourself better and end up looking better :)

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rainbowfeet · 19/10/2013 14:37

Toooldforglitter ... Grin Your post is brilliant!
Tonight I shall go on my date with the attitude this is me if you don't like all of me... Don't text or ring me again... Your loss Grin

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FreddieStarrAteMyHamster · 18/10/2013 11:32

Dieting is too restrictive and miserable to manage long term. The only weight control method I have been able to stick to is the 5:2 as it doesn't dominate my life and it's simple (and for most of the week i can eat what I want).

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GenericNWMum · 17/10/2013 22:57

Phone is nuts - clearly i meant working on loving yourself - not me loving yourself...although I suspect you are a very loveable person!

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GenericNWMum · 17/10/2013 22:55

Juliet I think there's a lot of merit in working out how I love yourself rather than focusing on your weight, but wanted to share the stress-free way I have found to lose a persistent stone i'd had for 3-4 years without ever getting rid of it. I bought the "escape the diet trap" book by John Briffa and lost that stone in 3 months and 6 months later it hasn't gone back on - because as another poster said up thread I've changed what my diet is, rather than be on a diet IYSWIM. It basically recommends, stopping all wheat products and cutting back completely on any grains at all - if you do have them they should be unrefined. Limit intake of sugar, always chose the full fat option and eat loads of leafy greens and protein. I don't feel like I'm on a diet, or that my food is bland. What really surprised me is that I don't feel bloated after meals anymore - hasn't realised I basically felt a bit unwell all the time!

On another note I can recommend meditation as a good way to improve self image

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MillyMillyMe · 17/10/2013 22:39

Thank you.

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TooOldForGlitter · 17/10/2013 22:37

Feminism/womens rights

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TrueStory · 17/10/2013 22:33

What happybubblebrain said!

Also, recommend reading "Fat Chance" by Dr Robert Lustig, have a look at the reviews on Amazon.

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MillyMillyMe · 17/10/2013 22:29

Whats the FWR board please TooOld Smile

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TooOldForGlitter · 17/10/2013 22:23

Hanging around on FWR board has finally given me the confidence to loudly say that i love my body. Im 'fat' by conventional ideas (size 18) but i'm healthy and strong and fit. My body has made people. My body is AMAZING. So is yours.

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