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AIBU?

To be cross with people who think their bags and coats need a seat.

73 replies

Caitlin17 · 13/10/2013 21:26

Title says it all. I think it's the height of rudeness in a crowded train, bus, cinema, airport terminal etc, etc to keep your bags and coats on a chair when people are standing.

And then compound it by getting all huffy and flouncy when asked "Is this seat taken?"

OP posts:
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StanleyLambchop · 13/10/2013 22:27

I was on a train once and the conductor actually announced that everyone was to remove their luggage from seats. 'Seats are for bottoms, not bags' he said. Everyone pretty much complied, it was a very busy train though!

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DaleyBump · 13/10/2013 22:28

A man refused to give me a seat on the train on Friday because his wallet and bottle of Vimto had nowhere else to go Hmm I'm 33 weeks pregnant and suffering from SPD. I could have ripped his head off.

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JumpOnIt · 13/10/2013 22:37

YANBU if there is a lack of seats. It is very rude and selfish and just downright annoying!

Equally annoying are the people who flounce past in a rather passive aggressive way or the people who make a point of asking someone to move a bag or coat when there are plenty of unoccupied pairs of seats.

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YoureBeingADick · 13/10/2013 22:46

daley I would have sat on his wallet and vimto in your situation.

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OctopusWrangler · 13/10/2013 22:47

I was on a crammed bus once, and a girl in front of me had crammed the seat next to her with all sorts of christmas junk. It was the only spare seat on the upper deck, lower deck was jammed too. Man politely asked her to move her stuff and she told him to fuck off as her wrapping paper was expensive. So he sat on it. Crushed the lot. She howled. I did too, with laughter.

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BillyBanter · 13/10/2013 22:49
Grin
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vanillamum · 14/10/2013 01:41

I once got on the train at Rugby travelling to London with 3 kids and DH. There were five seats free altogether in the carriage but only because a woman on her own had spread items across every seat pointedly taking up the whole six seat section. Normally I would not have taken her on as there was a definite glare she was giving off but there was no way I could let my children stand for the whole journey and they were too little to split up across the odd single seats dotted along the carriage. You know when you know the entire carriage is watching for entertainment-it was like that -but anyway I had to ask her to move each individual bag and then direct a child to sit down and she did but looking increasingly cross as she realised she was going to be boxed in by our family. The train pulls out and DD2 goes green and recognising that face I take off my coat (I hadn't got a bag handy) hold it underneath her and she pukes up sphagetti all over my coat. (I am quite proud of managing to catch all of it) DH returns from putting the buggy away in the luggage rack so I hand him daughter and coat to be cleaned up and apologise briefly to the woman. She looks at me in utter disgust and says "I can't stand it" and at this point she collects all her stuff and walks to another carriage. From us sitting down to her leaving must have happened in the space of five minutes.
It was a moment the chasm between the pre-child and post child me has never been wider. The post child me was feeling glad to have caught all the sick neatly, thanking God for DH and smug to have the seats to ourselves. The pre-child me was just saying-what do you look and smell like, thats your coat you have just let her puke on, you are going to have to chuck your only decent coat out of the train window because it smells so bad, what will people think, people like you shouldn't be allowed kids, why have three when you can't organise one blah, blah....

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Caitlin17 · 14/10/2013 02:24

Well if I'd been on that train I'd definitely have moved the boxes and bags without having to be asked (and not following the logic of the posters who think it's up to the person wanting the seat to ask, it's just good manners to make space when the train starts to fill up) I'd like to think I might have offered to help but suspect I might have moved if there were other seats.

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BenNJerry · 14/10/2013 09:14

YANBU if there are no other available seats. Sure, you can ask people if they can move their things, but the polite thing to do is to move the bags BEFORE being asked. I hate getting on a crowded bus and people with bags on the seats just stare at you.

I was on a busy bus the other day and a lady was sat at the front with all her bags next to her on the seat. An elderly woman got on with a walking frame and this lady with the bags had the audacity to say to her "I think there's a free seat at the back." Cheeky cow! I was torn between offering her my seat but I had DS on my lap, and why the f**k should this lady have a seat for her bags? Luckily there was a spare seat and the elderly lady was happy enough to take it, but I can't believe the blimmin' rudeness of some people.

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Coupon · 14/10/2013 09:21

YANBU. Yes, you can ask people to move their stuff but I agree they shouldn't huff and flounce when they have to move it! It's so entitled and rude.

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Coupon · 14/10/2013 09:21

And don't get me started on people who won't get out of the seats you have reserved tickets for Angry

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Mrsdavidcaruso · 14/10/2013 09:31

Reading this reminded me of when I had a reserved seat on a train a couple of months ago. I have a bad leg and the airline seats don't seem to have enough leg room so I always book a table seat.

I also find that if I book early enough and am very nice to to the clerk at the booking office I can get the nice seat, next to the window and facing direction of travel Smile

On this occasion a very up her own arse cow was in my seat working on her computer, all her gear was spread over the other 3 seats.

When politely asked her to move she refused telling me there were plenty of empty seats (all airline types) and she was 'working'.

I had to sit with in the airline seat across the aisle from her with my leg sticking out asking louder and louder for her to leave my seat until the train manager appeared.

The ensuing argument between her and the TM was actually funny, she
started to have a go at the train company and how unfair it was she pays £1000s every year and someone with an advanced ticket who has paid less gets her seat, it was disgusting, etc etc.

The TM after hearing her rant looked at me and just said to me first class is two carriages along and is empty go and sit in there and I will be with you in a minute. When I told him I couldn't afford to upgrade he just said no problem.

I spent the next couple of hours sitting next to the window facing direction of travel in a large comfy seat.

I saw the woman on the platform when I got off and thanked her for making it possible for me to have such a pleasant comfortable journey.

Which must have really annoyed her as I also saw the TM to thank him again and he told me that at the next stop he directed a lady with two small children into the three empty seats next to the woman didn't look like she got much work done Wink

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Beccagain · 14/10/2013 09:33

Mrs David Caruso I love you, and the train manager!

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nancerama · 14/10/2013 09:47

I used to commute out of Paddington every evening. The trains are always packed with (at least) twice as many passengers as there are seats.

One evening a woman parked herself in the aisle seat with her bags piled up in the window seat. I asked her if I could sit down. She tutted and rolled her eyes and said "but where is my bag supposed to go?" I suggested perhaps the bag rack. She then very slowly started gathering her stuff up, huffing and puffing and making a big deal of things. By this point more passengers were piling on and I was causing a blockage in the carriage and I decided I'd rather stand than sit next to an entitled ball of anger huffing and puffing for my entire journey home.

I very loudly announced "I am clearly inconveniencing you, and spun around on my heels to flounce off. As I spun, my bag flew sideways and I smacked her square between the eyes. I honestly didn't mean to, but boy, she deserved it.

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Trills · 14/10/2013 09:47

What an idiot - you can tell that a seat is reserved!

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AllDirections · 14/10/2013 09:57

Once you see the train/bus filling up, move your damn bag! The seats are for people!

This

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wowfudge · 14/10/2013 10:17

DaleyBump - I can't believe the guy who thought his bottle of bloody Vimto deserved a seat more than a pregnant woman! I'd have asked where his Vimto's ticket/seat reservation was. What an utter sh1t.

My OH regularly gets a train which originates at an airport station and regularly has to contend with other passengers putting their suitcases of all shapes and sizes on seats instead of in the luggage racks, the spaces between seat backs or on the overhead racks.

I have never put my stuff on an empty seat or my feet for that matter - that really hacks me off. The surly look of the other passenger who reluctantly moves his/her feet off the opposite seat is another thing which makes my blood boil.

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Thatdidnotgowell · 14/10/2013 10:23

Quite often when a train is empty I'll put my bag/stuff on the seat next to me, just because I prefer to keep it with me if possible and it is a bit annoying when it's tangled up round your feet etc. If I notice the train filling up though then I'll always move my stuff and make space for people/will actively offer the seat to someone if it looks like they're looking around to find somewhere to sit, and if I'm reading a book and in my own little world and don't happen to notice the train getting fuller then I'm always more than happy to move my stuff for people if they ask. I really don't see the point in asking someone to move their bags if there are spare seats without them though, you're not proving anything, just being petty. If it gives you that smug self-congratulatory feeling then crack on, but I doubt the people who have moved their bags give it a second thought, so you've not really 'proved' anything or annoyed them at all, it's a mild inconvenience at best, and not really one worth wasting any thought on at all.

The only thing that does infuriate me is when someone doesn't ask you to move your stuff, just sits down on it, what on earth is the point?! My OH and I were on an almost empty train once, woman came into the carriage, my bag was on the seat next to me as there were plenty of spare seats, woman got on the train and obviously thought she'd 'make her point' and sat on my bag. I'm not sure what reaction she thought she'd get from me, but she was an awful lot less bolshy when asked what the hell she thought she was doing. Eye shuffle, mumble, grumble about bags on seats followed by her moving anyway. The stupid thing is, I would have cheerfully and politely moved my bag if she'd just asked me, no skin off my nose! Don't be a dick, and if you're going to be then at least have the guts to brazen it out, otherwise it's just a cowardly bully mentality.

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Wallison · 14/10/2013 10:36

I was once travelling on a very crowded train we had booked seats on. I knew the seat numbers and looking through the window could see the little reservation tickets sticking up as the train pulled in. While we were waiting to get on, I actually saw two men go to the seats, take the tickets out and sit down. So when we did get on I said to them very politely that I was very sorry but I believed those were our seats. They said there were no reservation tickets, so I replied that I had seen them take the tickets out and sit down, so please could we have our seats. Fortunately they were sufficiently embarrassed so we got them, but honestly if that isn't sheer brass-neck I don't know what is.

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limitedperiodonly · 14/10/2013 10:38

nancerama I had a slightly different one. I got on the Gatwick Express and put my case on top of another one in the luggage rack.

A woman said it was her case and told me to move mine because it would damage hers. I refused. She then insisted on taking out her case and putting it on top of mine.

I take it she's never seen baggage handlers in action.

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oldgrandmama · 14/10/2013 10:40

I say, ever so politely, 'May I sit there, please?' Never had a refusal (so far) and often the offender apologises too. But then I'm pretty ancient. By the way, another annoyance: those seats in buses with a notice asking that they be offered to disabled, elderly, etc., but they're often occupied by stony-faced young women engrossed in their Blackberries (or whatever). Fair enough, but NOT when there's some gnarled old sod with a walking stick standing in the aisle next to them!

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limitedperiodonly · 14/10/2013 10:43

I don't understand people who sit next to you to make a point when there are other seats available. Never seen anyone deliberately sit on things.

I once sat on a small dog on a bench in a crowded restaurant in France but I was drunk didn't see it.

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Maryann1975 · 14/10/2013 10:51

We had this recently, packed train, family of 5, 2 seats together covered in bags, 2 seats separate further down the cArriage. Put 2 eldest dcs (age 5+7) on separate seats, ask young couple to move bags please to enable me and 2 year old to sit. DH to stand. Big argument ensued, which half the carriage got involved in. (His partner looked mortified). No one could believe how rude this bloke (well dressed, in his 20's) was, when according to someone else I had been nothing but polite. If he has kids he will understand the problem. Bags do not need seats, they need to go on luggage racks, on knees, or under seats.

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Wallison · 14/10/2013 11:03

I don't understand deliberately homing in on seats with bags on either - not sure what it achieves.

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Bumblequeen · 14/10/2013 11:08

I once asked a woman to kindly move her bag and she told me to sit elsewhere!

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