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AIBU?

to get wound up with people going on about being pregnant

51 replies

JRmumma · 27/09/2013 09:30

Now i know i could just remove or hide these people on fb, but it really winds me up in rl too when pregnant women go on relentlessly about the fact that they are pregnant or about pregnancy related ailments etc. For example this morning ive seen a status update on how many times one person got up in the night to wee, one with a back ache, and one who hasn't been offered a seat on the train. OK WE GET IT, YOU ARE PREGNANT! WELL DONE!

It may sound a bit harsh but i just don't understand why we need relentless updates. I know they are excited and all that, ive got a 7 week old so i have a very fresh memory about how exciting it all is, but for everyone else it gets boring really quickly. I used to get sick of people continuously asking me how i was and expecting a pregnancy update when i was pregnant, and loved it when people ignored the fact i was expecting and spoke to me like an actual person, not a baby growing vessel.

Is it too much to ask that women realise the world doesnt revolve around their pregnancy and that everyone else is just getting on with their lives??????

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JRmumma · 27/09/2013 18:02

But i AM a dickhead saucyjack, just not a boring one!

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CherryLips1980 · 27/09/2013 17:25

YANBU. I suspect most of the people on my FB don't know I'm pregnant and 'thanks' to being so hugely fat anyway, at 34+6, I still don't REALLY look up the duff.

I got told the other day I don't behave like I'm pregnant. [shrug] This is my first so I'm not entirely sure how I'm meant to behave? Is there some sort of mummy to be behaviour that I'm missing out on?

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SaucyJack · 27/09/2013 17:20

YABU. People are entitled to talk about the things that are important to them on their personal FB pages- in fact I'd go as far as to say that was the whole point of social media.

If you're enough of a dickhead to be aggressively bored or offended by what your alleged friends are posting, then do them a favour and delete them.

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SelectAUserName · 27/09/2013 17:03

Even when I don't find something particularly interesting, I can accept that it is of importance to the person talking/updating about it, but there are some people who give the impression of being The Only Person in the World, Ever, to have gone through X.

I worked with someone very like DoJo's acquaintance: having talked from the moment she got married about how much she was looking forward to starting a family and how exciting it would all be and how she couldn't wait to be pregnant, when she did announce her pregnancy a few months later all - and I mean ALL - she did was moan about it. From the outside, she seemed to be having a fairly straightforward pregnancy; no hyperemesis, no particular concerns for her or her baby's health, but EVERYTHING was so much effort, or she had to be extra-careful because she was having a baby, didn't you know? And she could no longer do X or Y at work (she had a desk job FFS!) and she needed a special chair, and someone to wheel it into the meeting room for her Hmm and was just a complete pain about it from beginning to end, while around her there were other pregnant colleagues, some of whom were dealing with things like hyperemesis, gestational diabetes and in one particularly awful case, worrying genetic test results, just getting on with it.

So you are B a bit U, OP, but I know the type and I sympathise!

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neenienana · 27/09/2013 16:40

I am pregnant and found that video hilarious. It's true, but maybe less so for mums who already have kids. Thus is my third and I am boring myself with all the chat. Can't wait to get back to normal and feel like me again. I also am acutely aware if many friends/colleagues on fb who can't concieve so would never post endless updates, it is so boring.

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neenienana · 27/09/2013 16:39

I am pregnant and found that video hilarious. It's true, but maybe less so for mums who already have kids. Thus is my third and I am boring myself with all the chat. Can't wait to get back to normal and feel like me again. I also am acutely aware if many friends/colleagues on fb who can't concieve so would never post endless updates, it is so boring.

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redexpat · 27/09/2013 16:18

YANBU. Everyone knows that

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MitMopse · 27/09/2013 15:54

Have to agree with op this annoys me too but learning how to hide certain people's posts has improved my fb enjoyment no end! It's the same thing as when someone posts about their holiday/ food/ cause/ new dog every five minutes- it's just a bit boring. Maybe I should just put fb away and do something worthwhile with my time....

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Lj8893 · 27/09/2013 14:24

Boring to you, yes. But obviously not to that person.

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JRmumma · 27/09/2013 14:20

Don't get me wrong, if you want to announce your pregnancy, or the sex, or occasionally post something that might be nice for those who care to know, then fine. But if you are relating EVERYTHING in your life to being pregnant then its too much and im sorry, but its boring!

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Crocodilehunter · 27/09/2013 13:56

Different strokes for different folks!
I love pregnancy & baby updates makes me all fuzzy and broody much to the dismay of my DP Grin
On the other hand cant stand updates that go on like, i have millions of clothes but never treat my self so am buying this, this and this today, they write something similar every other week Confused

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jammiedonut · 27/09/2013 13:42

I'm on the fence. On the receiving end, yes it is irritating, but you do have the power to ignore. I was guilty of endless pregnancy talk this year. My pregnancy consumed my life, I couldn't move without being in constant pain or discomfort, so unfortunately it was the only thing I could think, and therefore talk about. I had fertility issues and was also so so happy to be pregnant I wanted to tell everyone all the time. I'm sure it was intensely annoying but luckily I'm surrounded by lovely people who kept their irritation to themselves. As far as I'm aware no one started bitching about it on the Internet!

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FacebookWanker · 27/09/2013 13:39

Lj my fried sed to roll hers eyes every time I mentioned something pregnancy related...I don't think I put any updates on Facebook...

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FeckOffCup · 27/09/2013 13:35

I'm on the fence too, on the one hand it's their facebook page and they can put what they want, on the other hand it can get boring/annoying. My friend has updated seven times since yesterday about going on holiday (driving to the airport now, waiting at check in, in the airport bar etc) and I am at the point of thinking just STFU, we don't need every detail.

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Lj8893 · 27/09/2013 13:31

Hmmm I'm pregnant (sorry for mentioning it!) and have post a fair amount of pregnancy/baby related things on my Facebook. But not ailments or things like that. Just things which I know my family and close friends who I don't see often will like to read. Things like we have just set up the nursery, bought first outfit etc.

And in rl, I do talk about my pregnancy a little bit, but not overly so. Am I meant to just not talk about the biggest thing in my life right now?

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JRmumma · 27/09/2013 13:16

Loving that site DoJo!

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needaholidaynow · 27/09/2013 13:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsMook · 27/09/2013 12:44

I've hidden a few people having long tedious pregnancies. I'm probably a hypocrite, but justify myself by covering it with humour rather than being a joyless whinge. I prefer to catch up on them once a week and get it in a wallop rather than be drip-fed their whinges constantly.

I don't doubt that I'm a baby bore, but given that my life is spent with a baby and toddler near constantly, there's not much else that is scintilating to report. Of the infant free moments this week, they can be summed up by "went to aqua areobics" and "Guiding planning meeting". Also deeply scintilating. People are free to hide me if they wish. Also I have distant friends and family who are interested in how we are doing.

A lot of people are mono-themed. I find it's their style of posting more than the topic that bothers me. I tended to save the venting about SPD for baby groups rather than general status. People dismissive of helpful suggestions tend to rile me more than the need to vent, and those who are uniformly negative.

YABU, you don't have to be wound up. Just hide them.

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DoJo · 27/09/2013 12:41

One of my friends appeared to be involved in some kind of competition to see how many topics she could relate to being pregnant, and managed to mummyjack almost every status anyone posted with stuff about her pregnancy. Nobody was allowed to be tired, feel ill, have a bad week or just have a little moan about anything without her popping up with a 'try all that when you're growing a human' post or a 'I'm ill too and can't even have aspirin so count yourself lucky' as though pregnancy was an entirely un-asked-for condition which had been foisted upon her.

OP - have you seen www.stfuparentsblog.com/? It might help to get it all out of your system without resorting to blocking people, although it sounds as though you could be one of their major contributors at the moment!

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DoudousDoor · 27/09/2013 12:26

I'm kinda on the fence on this one, mainly because its FB and a lot of people use it to post mundane trivia, whether its pregnancy, dieting, holidays or whatever. So why highlight the annoying pregnancy ones more than the other ones?

On the other hand, I got lots of TMI about my SIL's pregnancy (and I'm not even on FB!), which, if I'd had more energy, I would have found irritating because when I was pregnant a few years earlier I was expressly forbidden by my DB to talk about my pregnancy to SIL as she would "freak out" Hmm as she thinks babies are "parasites". Fortunately I couldn't be bothered to get irritated and instead just found it mildly amusing that there were such double standards!

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101handbags · 27/09/2013 11:46

My facebook timeline is full of pets, babies, children, meals and cakes. I have no interest in any of these but it's what's important in people's lives so it's what they post. I post a lot about the exhibitions, theatre, ballet and cinema I have seen lately as that's what I am interested in. It probably bores the cakes & babies friends to death.

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FutTheShuckUp · 27/09/2013 11:41

I know someone like this. Every minute boring mundane detail of pregnancy. And now constant updates of her 'baby' (who's three) sleeping or eating or dancing as if she's the only child that's ever existed. Grr.

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DidoTheDodo · 27/09/2013 11:33

I think the pregnancy ones are far worse than the (boring) mortgage ones as it is such an emotive subject with the power to be very hurtful.
I'd have thought "I can't get a mortgage" is possibly less devastating than "I can't have a baby".

My personal pet hate is pictures of babies eating very messily. It just makes me feel sick!

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JRmumma · 27/09/2013 11:29

Those people irritate me too!!! I get updates on what time someone's puppy wakes them up each morning. INTERESTING!!

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MidniteScribbler · 27/09/2013 11:03

You think that's bad? I had one friend who updated every time her dog had a poop! Confused

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