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AIBU?

to wish this child would stop effing screaming?

38 replies

NoisyBrain · 22/08/2013 21:29

There is a child somewhere nearby, who is incapable of playing outside without screaming like a banshee. I'm talking blood-curdling, top-of-voice screaming and it's extremely irritating.

Of course I expect to hear kids' laughter and some shouting during the summer holidays (and I'm noticing it more because I'm on maternity leave I suppose), but is high-pitched screaming during play necessary under ANY circumstances? I don't know how old the child in question is, but definitely sounds older than a toddler who might not know better. It sounds like proper horror film screaming too. The only reason I know the child is playing is because I can hear other children's voices at the same time as the screams.

My mum was really strict with me about things like this. If she'd heard me screaming I'd have been made to come inside and told off for annoying the neighbours. Aside from the annoyance factor, her argument was that if I was ever in real trouble and screaming out of fear or pain no-one would realise - like the boy who 'cried wolf'. I think she had a point, but being pregnant with my pfb I'm aware I know very little about the realities of policing such behaviour. So, aibu to think it shouldn't be encouraged?

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StillSlightlyCrumpled · 23/08/2013 20:24

Oh, YANBU at all to wish the child would be quiet.

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StillSlightlyCrumpled · 23/08/2013 20:23

DS2 has hearing & speech impairment & he has a high pitched voice at the best of times, but when he is upset/ angry I'm quite sure the noise can be heard in space. Fortunately, as soon as I say 'shush!' he will try but by then the toddler has joined in, I have to be loud to be heard.....

I am strict about what time etc they are allowed outside though, & my lovely neighbours know about his difficulties.

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twistyfeet · 23/08/2013 20:19

dd is non verbal and screams a lot. I keep the windows shut and apologise to the neighbours constantly but there's nothing I can do. She is brain damaged. Drives me nuts too and I'm trapped in with her.

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ouryve · 23/08/2013 20:15

DS2, with ASD and non verbal, is one heck of a screamer, sometimes, and it drives me to distraction. I reach a point where I end up numb to it. DS1, also with ASD, really struggles with it.

I still found it hard to tolerate a girl (NT) who used to live in our street who could not play out without being just plain shrill. Catch a ball shrieeeeek walk down the street with her friends shrieeek and, as soon as there was a big enough audience, she'd conduct every single conversation at the top of her effing shrill effing voice. She'd even talk to her mother, who was in the house, from the other side of the street, in the same way. Mother didn't pull her up on it any more than she'd pull her brother up for running in front of cars or hurling things at them, or taking the piss out of my kids.

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comingalongnicely · 23/08/2013 20:15

The brat next door screeches when he wakes up, when he goes to school , when he goes to bed, when his parents dare to say no....

It's never bloody ending.

I tolerate it, I've had kids, I know what they're like. Sometimes though, I think - "it's 07:00 on a Sunday morning, for christ's sake tell your fucking child to be quiet".

I did it to mine, you did it to yours - they're still healthy happy kids!!

I make allowances & would never say anything as that's life unfortunately. The fact that the mother seems unable to communicate with him by any other means than bellowing pisses me off mightily though....

I'll either win the lottery & move or go postal - time will tell....

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ketchupontoast · 23/08/2013 20:14

Screaming doesn't bother me, its hearing - 'sticks and stones can break my bones but you mum will never fuck me' coming over my back wall from some 7 year olds, that disgusted me. When I went out to ask them to not be so disgusting but they had gone by the time I got out and I found my coping stones off the top of my wall broken (it was built 18 months ago) so when I see them there will be some very strong words said, pity the rain is being the police today!

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StarlightMcKenzie · 23/08/2013 20:08

My children scream. If I try and stop them then the neighbours just hear my screaming on too.

Just thank your lucky stars that you don't live as close to them as I do!!!

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cansu · 23/08/2013 20:04

Child could have sn. My ds has ASD and is non verbal. He screeches and screams a lot. There isn't much that can be done about it. We do everything we can to keep him calm but sometimes he shouts or screams for no apparent reason.

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Mumsyblouse · 23/08/2013 20:01

I had one screamer who had the worst scream I've ever heard on a toddler it terrified us all, the childminder, anyone in a 10 mile radius and so on. But she screamed for anger/frustration one large scream and would then get removed/put in her cot if it carried on. I didn't just let her scream for hours at people, it was truly awful for us and we love her! Play screaming isn't permitted in my house, shrieking/fun shouting/laughing all ok, but not proper screaming, it's worrying for others if they hear a child scream properly.

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Nagoo · 23/08/2013 19:51

In my extended family screeching DC get sent upstairs as soon as it starts. You scream you don't get to play.

Play shrieking is different to a temper tantrum screaming session. The children screaming in a supermarket are screaming because they are objecting to a parent. I don't judge that, it's a temper tantrum, they all do it, and the parent is dealing with it.

Shrieking and screaming while playing that is allowed to go on and on gets on my tits because it happens due to the parent not bothering to tell them to STFU stop, in many circumstances I have heard.

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MrsYamada · 23/08/2013 19:38

Buy some ear-plugs.

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ILetHimKeep20Quid · 23/08/2013 19:33

Kids playing isn't the problem, can be quite nice.

It's the pointless fucking screaming I can't abide.

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trinity0097 · 23/08/2013 19:27

I can live with normal kids playing sounds, but I agree that screaming for no good reason, e,g I just screamed earlier this evening as my cat jumped up and dug claws and jaws into my leg, is unwarranted and parents should be disciplining their children to ensure that they are not playing out in an antisocial manner.

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MummyPig24 · 23/08/2013 19:26

Yanbu. I hate screeching. Unfortunately dd is a screecher and ds is a shouter. I have to remind them frequently that no one wants to hear them shouting and screaming and if they continue they will come in. Our ndns have 3yr old twins who shout over the fence to my 2 and its annoying as it encourages ds shouting. They are great kids and we get on well but stop bloody shouting, all of you!!

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PeteCampbellsRecedingHairline · 23/08/2013 19:18

I think some of you are my neighbours.

I live on a green and my DS and his friends are so bloody loud when they play outside. Blush

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EndoplasmicReticulum · 23/08/2013 19:18

I hate screaming. If mine scream they only do it once and then they have to come in. I have told them they have to save it for emergencies.

I blame school, they seem to have screaming competitions in the playground, they didn't do it before they started.

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MrsLouisTheroux · 23/08/2013 19:14

justanuther :Children scream whine cry. Whining and kids go hand in hand. I've not met a kid who didn't whine at some point in their life.
Not all children scream/ whine/ cry on a daily basis.
I've met plenty who don't make a habit of it.

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carabos · 22/08/2013 22:42

We live in a terrace house with a lane behind wide enough for two cars. Some neighbours park there, but essentially it's a safe traffic-free zone. As a result, all the kids in the street play there. They congregate round our back yard because NDN's DS1 is the ringleader popular.

The noise is horrific. I work from home and my office is on the first floor at the back. During the school hols, I can't take a phone call in there because of the screeching. I can't work with the windows open, and I find myself migrating around the house throughout the day in search of quiet.

I have never complained or asked them to keep the noise down - they're just kids, and they're off school. The thing that majorly pisses me off though is there is a huge school playing field at the end of our road and none of them ever plays there - even the ones whose homes are adjacent to it. No, they must come round to ours. Hmm

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emmelinelucas · 22/08/2013 22:35

The local primary school is very near our house. It is bliss in the holidays. Every year there is just ONE screamer, that can be heard above all the others.
I really do dread them going back every year.
Having said that, the neighbours at the back have something knocked down and built up every summer (when they - both teachers bugger off for 4 weeks)
So-there is always something to get on the nerves.
And I feel sorry for mothers of screamers.

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NoisyBrain · 22/08/2013 22:26

My unborn ds is going to be a screamer just to pay me back for starting this thread isn't he? Blush

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Famzilla · 22/08/2013 22:25

Ugh I hate hate hate the Screechy screaming noise!

NDN's kid screams every day about everything from 8-6 without fail. We live in terraced houses with French doors going out to our gardens and I actually have to shut all windows & doors when it's DD's nap time as there is no way anyone could sleep through it.

No SN's, just an annoying kid with a stoner mum.

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InTheRedCorner · 22/08/2013 22:01

It's horrible.

DD screams when angry and not getting what she wants and I hate it Sad it's an ongoing problem along with everything else she is going through.

The neighbours judge me because of her ways, I know this because they mainly ignore me throw dirty looks, slag me off these days.

I spend my days being a referee to DD and her siblings, we stay in a lot because of everything which in some ways makes it worse.

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lougle · 22/08/2013 22:01

Hurts mine too.

I was actually in a queue in a supermarket a couple of months ago and the chap serving us has ASD. DD3 normally saves her unreasonable behaviour for home, but on this occasion let rip in the store.

I was doing quite well until the chap serving us said 'That girl is really annoying me...' I looked at him and said 'She's annoying me too, but if you serve me I can get her out of your way...' and thought 'at least you don't have to take her home

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WorraLiberty · 22/08/2013 21:57

I hate it too although I've never complained

I've just thanked fuck that they're not my kids Grin

But it physically hurts my brain

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justanuthermanicmumsday · 22/08/2013 21:56

Children scream whine cry. Whining and kids go hand in hand. I've not met a kid who didn't whine at some point in their life.

I can understand your sentiments but my daughter is a banshee I don't live near you do I! Lol no amount of me talking to her helps. She apologies profusely promises she won't then as soon as her brother so much as touches her even by accident high pitched scream. It's like a Hitchcock movie moment lool. It's not funny it's annoying, angers me stresses me. To be fair her and my son are only a year apart and they've come to a phase where they seem to argue or fight every day, then five mins later they're best mates again. I have spoken to other mums and teachers they've told me its normal phase and will pass.

Some parents have told me to chill out.I can't reprimand them every five mins. so now I choose carefully when to reprimand and other times I leave them to resolve their disputes. If its gets too out of hand I get them indoors. I do try and respect the neighbours and in the summer if I know they are out for a barbecue which is really rare I get my kids indoors.If i can see theyre gardening and my boy is bothering them, hes so darn chatty and cross questions everything, that kid could give jeremy paxman a run for his money lol.Otherwise I'm afraid I will leave them out to enjoy the weather. They're kids I'm sure we shouted, screamed whined too.

If we go to a big park I let them talk loud shout kids need some outlet I don't like always hushing them up. I've yet to see a parent here bat an eyelid at their behaviour. Or maybe I'm just a bad parent with evil kids .

If you have solutions for the screaming or whining please do tell.

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