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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not re-register the births of my children after getting married?

71 replies

TiredyCustards · 01/07/2013 07:27

DP and I have been together nearly 10 years, and are getting married in a couple of weeks.

We have 2 DC, and aren't in the least bit bothered about not being married when they were born.

It seems we're supposed to re-register the DC after getting married to make them 'children of the marriage' or some such guff about legitimacy.

AIBU to not bother - I find it a bit offensive that we're expected to re-write history, as if being born out of wedlock is still something to be ashamed of.

Also, would anything happen if we didn't?

OP posts:

ThisWayForCrazy · 01/07/2013 08:32

It's not the law!

ArabellaBeaumaris · 01/07/2013 08:33

scaevola it's not the law!

Indith · 01/07/2013 08:41

We have not done ds1. Why would he need another birth certificate stating that we are married? It distorts fact, we were not married when he was born, why would I want to pretend that we were?

It makes sod all difference to inheritance and even if it did we have wills.

badbride · 01/07/2013 08:49

Tiredy: it's certainly worth getting some legal advice about this, especially as the act of getting married automatically invalidates your existing wills.

Perhaps have a chat to your solicitor when he/she redrafts your will? I am not a lawyer, but I have a feeling that there are some old legitimacy laws kicking about still that affect the ability of legitimised vs non-legitimised DCs to inherit property. I suspect (though don't know for sure) that you getting married will fix that, but I have no idea what the implications of not re-registering would be.

scaevola · 01/07/2013 08:53

It is the law - section 14(2) of the births and Deaths Registration Act 1953.

pommedechocolat · 01/07/2013 08:55

oo we reregistered dd1 but havent redone wills. Does it really invalidate wills? God getting married is an arse.

ImNotBloody14 · 01/07/2013 08:57

Ive never heard of this before!!

It seems a bit silly. Everyone will know when your child was born and they will know what date you got married so what exactly does reregistering do? It cant alter those dates so its never going to look like the child was 'of the marriage'

badbride · 01/07/2013 09:04

pomme If I understand correctly, it usually does, unless the will specifically mentions that it has been drawn up with a forthcoming marriage in view, see: www.lawontheweb.co.uk/Wills/Changing_a_Will .

I would definitely seek advice on the legal consequences of not re-registering DCs, just in case my will was challenged and and "legitimate" family members ended up having a stronger claim on my assets.

This depends, of course, on where you live. The above info applies to England and Wales, no idea what happens in Scotland.

Usual caveats of I Am Not A Lawyer and Do Your Own Research apply to all of the above, of course

Original poster

TiredyCustards · 01/07/2013 13:39

Oh bum, invalid wills?

Is that the whole will or just inheritance bits?

OP posts:

WillYouDoTheFandango · 01/07/2013 13:42

When we went the registrar said it had to do with applying for a baby passport. If you filled in the form to say married and then sent off a birth cert where you weren't married the application would be rejected until you reregister. Not sure if its true but she was very insistent.

Indith · 01/07/2013 13:59

We've never had a problem with passports. But then we got ds1's before we got married. With the others I still had maiden name on my passport and stuff so we just sent our marriage certificate along with the birth certificates so there was a full, legal paper trail and it was all fine.

DarkWinter · 01/07/2013 14:02

The WHOLE will.

ArabellaBeaumaris · 01/07/2013 14:03

Haven't had any issues getting passports, either before or after we got married (one DC born before, one DC born after).

My parents got married when I was 8 & didn't re register me, I haven't had any problems getting passports either.

WillYouDoTheFandango · 01/07/2013 14:09

Ah well, obviously she was talking crap then to get us to reregister

DjangoDjango · 01/07/2013 14:19

It's about 'Parental Responsibility'.

If your children were born before 1st Dec 2003 your partner would have had no Parental Responsibility for your children - even if he's named on the birth certificate. Now your married that's automatic, though we were told that re-registering the children was a legal requirement for the dad to gain Parental Responsibility.

motherinferior · 01/07/2013 14:23

Just cancel the wedding. Sorted

picnicbasketcase · 01/07/2013 14:24

Oh crap, I meant to do that and forgot. I'd better ring the register office at some point.

FrustratedSycamoresRocks · 01/07/2013 14:25

mother

IneedAsockamnesty · 01/07/2013 14:30

Django,

Pr by a biological father is automatically obtained when he marries the biological mother,if you re register or not it occurs at the instant you legally marry. The re registering only provides proof of this but a marriage cert where there is no dispute about who the biological father is would do exactly the same thing.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 01/07/2013 14:34

I re-registered DD after me and DH married. I was told it was to make my details on her birth certificate up to date, and make everything tally (I.E my current proof of I.D would match DD's birth cert).

I believe my nephew was refused a passport until the re-registered birth certificate was sent in as his original birth certificate did not match his mothers current details, so I guess they do have to be done if you wish to get passports.

badbride · 01/07/2013 14:53

Tiredy I think it invalidates the whole will. So if you did nothing, your estate would be administered according to the rules of intestacy. And I have no idea what that would mean for the "legitimacy" side of things.

It all depends on how the will was worded, however, And it may be possible to fix it with a simple amendment known as a codicil (i.e. you might not have to fork out to have the whole will re-written, just for a codicil). But, this is something only an expert (ie not me) could advise you on.

I appreciate the point of view raised by several posters that they don't like the idea of history being "re-written", hence don't want to re-register. But from the point of view of the law, the act of getting married DOES re-write history, making your DCs a product of the marriage. The re-registration is simply to record the status quo as seen through the eyes of the law, and is a legal requirement.

This is understandably annoying, but perhaps you can keep the original birth certs of your DCs to reflect the true history?

scaevola · 01/07/2013 15:00

Yes, marriage invalidates a will (unless it was specifically drawn up in anticipation of the marriage).

But an old will can be used as a (non-binding) indication of wishes for things like guardianship. And with marriage, different intestacy provision kicks in for the new spouse.

ProfYaffle · 01/07/2013 15:01

I sent off for passports for my dds, we weren't married when dd1 was born but haven't re-registered, and we were married when dd2 was born. Had no problems at all.

ArabellaBeaumaris · 01/07/2013 15:05

littleprincess you're assuming there that the mother changes her name, aren't you? I haven't changed my name (nor did my mother) so my ID remains the same.

mrsjay · 01/07/2013 15:08

I didnt know you are supposed to re register your children is this just in England and wales ? I am in scotland and i have never heard of this ? I wasnt married when i had dd1 i didnt think you had to do anything

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