Divorce lawyer Vanessa Platt is wrong about Nigella Lawson

[vivizone]

I thought it is well known that counselling is not advisable for DV couples? it's worrying that Ms Platt could say this:

Divorce lawyer Vanessa Platt, who has represented many women who want to leave abusive relationships, was surprisingly supportive of Nigella?s private desire to save her marriage. She said: ?When a high-profile woman is in a situation with a controlling husband, people usually wonder why she won?t leave him.
?But pressure from family and the press can be very overwhelming and doesn?t always help the situation. It can make it difficult for them to make a decision. I always recommend that the couple go for counselling.?

Most of Nigella's family, especially her father Nigel, are said to be furious that Saatchi has created this hugely embarrassing storm
Platt suggests that Saatchi may have a narcissistic personality. ?If it is the case he has anger issues, then he must see a specialist to get help. Nigella is right to insist that is a requirement for the marriage to continue.?

She can recommend counselling but any decent couples counsellor will not counsel a couple involved in dv!

Bad misinformed advice!

This woman's an idiot. I've read some of the tripe she's come out with before and it's nearly always woman-hating. She likes to posit herself as a man's woman who understands what men want from sex and relationships. I'd be amazed if she had a single good female friend.

if it is the case he has anger issues, then he must see a specialist to get help.

Sorry but that doesn't say they should go to counseling it says he has a problem and he needs address it.

It is the same as saying an alcoholic needs to quit the alcohol for a marriage to continue.

BTW I do think Nigella should leave the Bastard.

If you've not managed to cope with anger at the age of 70, somehow I doubt very much that seeing a specialist now is terribly likely to help.

And her family are unhappy about the media storm? Very very odd priorities going on there...

No sashh, but "[In Nigella's sort of situation] I always recommend that the couple go for counselling." does say it. Saying he needs to get help is spot on, but the rest of it sounds like dangerous bullshit to me. :(

I think that she is right that he has the narcissistic personality - I find things like he hosts parties and won't attend them- very rude and it is a shame that people turn up - by his age he should have grown out of such self centred behaviour. I would say that he needs help for anger management but doubt he would be open to it.
Therefore - yes I agree he needs to get help BUT not the rest.

Why wouldn't councelling help? It doesnt say to go to councelling together, more like 2 seperate issues,

1. nigella May be finding this overwhelming and private and public pressure might be too much and prevent her from seeing the truth as plainly as it is

And

2. He has an issue and is potentially narcissistic and this needs to be addressed asap as it can prevent him also realising what an abusive dickhead he is and the self centred aspect of it can make him try and turn it into everyone elses fault

And that ultimately won't help Nigella?

I dont understand whats wrong with a councelling suggestion (seperatley) - but I admittedly have never been in this situation

He needs the counselling - he needs to accept he has a problem and address it before joint counselling would be any good.

She didn't say joint counselling.

She doesn't say 'joint counselling'
They probably both need separate counselling, him for anger mgtmt

"Divorce lawyer Vanessa Platt, who has represented many women who want to leave abusive relationships, was surprisingly supportive of Nigella?s private desire to save her marriage."

If it's private, how does she know about it?

I think individual counselling or therapy could be very helpful.

Both for support and to confront the issues involved.

She didn't say couples' counselling, she said HE would benefit from some