Patience wearing thin.
DH not British, we met and married in his country, then decided (mutually) to come to the UK 2 years ago. His first time abroad, and he is not enjoying it. He has managed to find a great, well paid job, which he hates. But won't change it. He has made friends, goes out a couple of times a month, but says he hates the UK, the weather, his job, tv, society, British women are all fat and ugly (er, thanks "D"H!)
He came home today with another rant, the gist of which seemed to be "How dare a foreign customer talk down to him" I reminded him customers of his own nationality are also often rude to him, he said not as rude as foreigners. Sorry, it's hard to explain, but it was really "all foreigners are so rude/no manners/piss me off.." kind of vein.
I have listened sympathetically for months and months, I know how horrible it feels to be homesick, but I can't stand listening every day to how he thinks British people are fat/ugly/stupid etc. If I ask him not to be judgy, he says I complained all the time in his country. I did, but about the weather, cockroaches and fascist right wingers hurling abuse at me, never about peoples looks/character but he doesn't believe me
We're not able to go back to his country yet but I'm so tempted to buy him a ticket as he seems so unhappy. I had to unfriend him on fb as every status was him moaning about how shit his life was (again, thanks "D"H!) or him and his friends making racist comments about British people/saying the UK was a shitehole.
I'm really torn between wanting to help him feel happier (and I come up with a lot of suggestions which he rejects outright) and wanting to throw things at his head when he starts the inevitable moaning/racist comments..
So I know I can't force him to love life here, although I wish I could make him happy, but AIBU to ask him to not insult/bitch complain everyday? Or is he BU to expect me to listen impartially? If I can also add, I was trying to talk to him about an ongoing pain/health problem that's been really bad the last week or so, and he was really disinterested in listening. Sigh.
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AIBU?
WIBU to ask him to stop being racist?
41 replies
NishiNoUsagi · 18/03/2013 00:16
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