AIBU not to have a schedule for my precious offspring?

[Madmum24]

Was just reading the pfb thread about SIL wanting to serve lunch 30 mins later than childrens usual time. I am rather shocked that many people have an exact time for meals/snacks, and deviations within those leave children flummoxed and parents "feeling guilty".

In our house we have a rhythm to the day, but no routine as such "we wake at 7am, have breakfast at 7.15am, lunch at 1pm, dinner at 5 and a snack at x, y and z".

My babies fed on demand and ate lunch when we ate, if anyone is hungry between meals they just get a snack there is no way I could manage to go for a few hours between meals and they all manage fine.

I am feeling now as if I am depriving my darlings of some ritualistic pleasures in life, so AIBU? Anyone else out there who does not live by the clock and the pfb's still survived?

[Groovee]

Now the children are at school we have a routine as to when to get up and when to leave etc. But in the holidays we tend to chill and go with the flow!

[Bunbaker]

You will find that once your children start school you tend to eat at pretty much the same time every day. At primary school lunch was at 12.00. DD found that she was hungry by 12 at home so that is when we generally had lunch, but not rigidly so. Breakfast is always at 6.30 on weekdays because DD has to catch the 7.45 bus to school. She now has lunch at 12.40 or 1pm depending on what rota she is on.

Evening meals can be anything between 6pm and 7.30.

If we had been invited to someone's house for a meal at a later time we normally ate I would just give DD a snack. Although with younger children it can be a problem if they are still having naps.

[Madmum24]

Thanks for the replies :-)

Just to reiterate I wasn't judging anyone for having a routine (my AIBU was regarding MY lack of routine) or thinking a strict routine is pfb although someone who expects everyone to adjust everything to their routine is I was wondering does this mean I am a terribly lazy mother which I probably am

I have 5 kids (oldest is 13) and the fact that we home educate is probably the main reason why we haven't needed to do things by the clock, I suspect if they were to start school then things would need to change.

Thanks again MN

[Pagwatch]

Well I think you were being pretty sarcastic about anyone who has a routine, all that crossing out and PFB stuff.

I think anyone who finds some thing that works should be delighted. I used to be a bit crap because the boys were chilled. Now I am having to improve as dd has a nightmare activity schedule.
It's her personality, her choice.i have to feed her at specific times so she eats between say gym and swimming. I got it wrong once and she had to get out of the pool to throw up.
She got straight back in though. I was oddly proud

[CatsRule]

My pfb has a very slack routine...in fact it barely resembles a routine!

We have breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks to suit the day. Eg if ds is sleeping at 12 when he notmally has dinner at nursery I wouldn't wake him, I'd just feed him when he wakes.

Same goes for naps too...he doesn't sleep much anyway but will sleep more if out in his pram so that slightly alters his routine.

Being flexible works for us but may not for others. Being flexible obviously works for you op and I wouldn't worry about having or not having any kind of routine, pfb or not...each to their own!