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AIBU?

to ask you to please share your success stories of getting PG post 30-ish?

164 replies

MoodyDidIt · 26/02/2013 10:06

i am 33 and dh and i are ttc

just come on today and i am so sad

we have only been ttc 3 months (i KNOW its no time at all) but with dd it happened so quick. like, days after we decided to ditch the contraception. i was only 28 then though. and i got pg with DS (from prev relationship) when i was 25 by accident very quick too Blush

and to top it off i have read a scaremongering article in the sun newspaper this morning about how womens fertility sharply drops after 32

we were TTC 2 years ago but stopped as it was not a good time financially, now i wish we had carried on trying as now it might be too late

please please share your positive stories :( sorry for being a drama queen. but it actually scares me how much i want dc3

OP posts:
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Asheth · 26/02/2013 11:35

It took me 4 months to conceive DS1 in my mid twenties. Conceived DS3 without even trying aged 34!

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DIYapprentice · 26/02/2013 11:38

DS1 at 37 and DS2 at 39, both after a few months of trying.

DS1's school class (Yr 1) is full of mums my age, give or take a couple of years. Only a handful are below 35.

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Geekster · 26/02/2013 11:38

I fell pregnant seven times after the age of 34, yes the first six ended in miscarriage but the seventh one stuck, I was 39 when she was born and she is one on Friday. So yes it possible to get pregnant in your 30's. I wish you lots of luck.

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vladthedisorganised · 26/02/2013 11:44

If it helps:
I had DD at 33
DC2 will arrive (hopefully) when I'm 36. I think it took 7 months of not-really-trying - I was expecting it to take longer.
My DGM married at 35 and went on to have 5 children; DAunt tried unsuccessfully in her 20s and went on to have a DS when aged 44.
A good friend has a DSis who is 25 years older than he is - he was something of a surprise to his parents!

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rodandtheemu · 26/02/2013 11:45

Hi, Im 34 and having an IVF baby. Many things can change quickly. Lining of womb, egg reserve...ect. The GP like you to wait at least a year before the will start investigations. I would go and ask for a AMH test -it gives an indication of your egg reserve. Then you can go from there. By the way you release more eggs as you get older so prepare for higher chance of twinnies!! Grin

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peacefuleasyfeeling · 26/02/2013 11:47

My advice, having had DD at 35 and expecting DC2 in June, at 38, is as follows: (I'm sorry it seems super-detailed, but it seems to be what you're asking for and it's what I did)

  1. Educate yourself about how the menstrual cycle and conception works in more detail. Lots of things start to make sense.
  2. Get a good sense of your cycle. Draw up a wallplanner type diagram on a big piece of card, with each cycle on a new "row" and the first day of your period being Day 1 in each row. Mark today, 26th of Feb, as you've just come on, as Day 1 of the first row, if you see what I mean. Start a new row next time you come on. You can jot down any physical symptoms of nearing ovulation you have on this chart, no matter how silly or insignificant they seem at first (try "lots of gloopy cervical mucous", "watery discharge", "pinching pain over left ovary" etc. Go to town. You quickly start to see patterns. I did this for about 6 months before TTC DD, and then we got it right really quickly.
  3. I found a ferning microscope" really easy to use (Calista and BabySure are two brands I've used). It is a small backlit magnifying lense cased in a plastic lipstick like tube. You just put a drop if saliva on the lense in the morning and when it has dried, you can see a fern-like pattern appear quite clearly if you are approaching ovulation or actually ovulating. When you are not fertile you just get little random specks. I marked my "ferning" days with a big F on my chart and could soon see that they occured at the same time every month (and not on the usual "Day 14" as expected). I actually used my first ferning microscope as a contraception device for years in my 20s, it is that reliable in my experience.
  4. It is a good idea apparently begin trying just before ovulation occurs, as it gives sperm time to reach the egg. And then some more as the fertile period gets into full swing.


Once you know when the right time is:

  1. The cervical mucous is there so that sperm can swim up tiny ladder like tunnel structures which are formed in it. Amazing. There are sperm-friendly vaginal lubricants which mimic this structure available, which a friend of mine used to "top up" the existing mucous. Worked. Also making sure you are properly "wet" when trying helps, especially if you sometimes suffer from dryness. Lots of foreplay or masturbation perhaps.
  2. I really do think that the standing on your head thing works; depending on how you're built. I used something called an Instead Cup with DD as I didn't have time to lie around with my ankles around my ears that morning. They are like little disposable diaphragms and hold the sperm close to the cervix. With DC2 I spent a while doing a wobbly shoulderstand Grin.


Hm, I think this is it. I really wish you good luck. I'm sure you're out in good time, but I also know how desperate one can feel when it appears not to be happening.
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nananaps · 26/02/2013 11:47

Had one at 33, and now have a 5 week old and i am nearly 43.

It has been a terrible journey to get here though. However, did it without any medical intervention.

Mine were true miracle pregnancies Smile

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PeppermintPasty · 26/02/2013 11:58

I had my first at 37 and my second at 41.

I am now 44 and knackered Grin

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ilovecolinfirth · 26/02/2013 12:01

I'm 33 and got pregnant with my first child at 28 on the first month of trying to conceive. With my second, it took me 3 months of trying...good luck. X

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eavesdropping · 26/02/2013 12:01

DD was unplanned conceived on our first try without contraception, I was 32

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Dawndonna · 26/02/2013 12:04

ds2 at 36 and twin dds at 38.
my sister had her first at 33 and second at 40.

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Omnishambolic · 26/02/2013 12:05

I read something the other day about scaremongering and about how I think it was 89% of women aged 35 were able to have children, and that most of those 11% unable had not been able to before (ie not just the big 3-5 age thing). (At 43 it was something like 15% of women still able to have children though.)

Took us 6 months serious trying aged 31 the first time. At 32, I wasn't using contraception but not making an effort (and certainly not having regular enough sex to make it likely, we thought, especially after the trying for DC1) and lo and behold, along came DC2.

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LazyMachine · 26/02/2013 12:07

I had my first DC just 7 days after my 39th birthday.

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SuitedandBooted · 26/02/2013 12:09

I had DD 2 months before my 40th birthday, and DS when I was 43. Both were conceived within 3 months of trying. I had been on the Pill for 17 years! Both pregnancies were really easy, and our children are completely healthy.

Yes. I know we were really lucky - and probably daft to wait so long (DH and I have a rather relaxed approach to life), and tend to leave stuff to the last minute! In my defence, I do have several female relatives who had children post 40. My maternal Gran is the winner, having her last child at 47. I was born when my Mum was 38, so I think that genes were slightly on my side.

33 is still young!!! You've done it before, you have plenty of time, please don't make it the focus of your life - keep fit, see your GP if you have any concerns, and enjoy making your next child x

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Fillyjonk75 · 26/02/2013 12:09

DD1 was unplanned and I conceived while I was on the Pill when I was 28. Actually trying for DD2 at 32, I came off the Pill and worked out roughly when I'd be ovulating and made sure we had sex three times a week round then. Also raised my legs after sex to catch all the sperm :) Worked in month 2, think in the first month we were apart for a week at what would have been the best time.

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4TheLoveOfBob · 26/02/2013 12:10

For me it has definitely been the case the conception happened more easily mwhen I was younger. Got pregnant in first month of trying with DC1, aged 27. Got pregnant within 3 mnths of trying second time at 30 (miscarried, though). Took 4 months to get pregnant again aged 31. Tried for another child for three years aged 32-35 with no joy, unexplained infertility.

However, all three of my closest frends had their first children at 35/36 and conceived within 6 months ish. Also have a colleague who conceived her first naturally at 41 after about a year of trying.

The facts are that fertility declines as we age, but a 33 I would not be too worried (easier said than done, I know). Give it a few more months and if still no jy, see your GP. Good luck!

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cuteboots · 26/02/2013 12:11

I had my son at 38 and he was a bit of a shock . Went through lots of fertility tests and were told we would probably never have children. Got divorced and took my eye off the ball really having been told this. Dont give up as Im proof that it cant happen +++

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stopgap · 26/02/2013 12:31

I had DS1 at 34. I have PCOS and got pregnant in a month.

35 now and will start trying for number two next month.

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Softlysoftly · 26/02/2013 12:36

All 3 of my pg (2dcs) were conceived post 30. In 35 now with a 9m old.

My friend was 45, never had kids, had a riding accident and in the hospital they asked her if shed noticed any bodily changes. Turns out she was 5 months pg and hadn't noticed Shock.

So its different for everyone.

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greenfolder · 26/02/2013 12:37

nicely-pull yourself together op

It might take a little longer- dd1 was 26 and fell by accident. dd2 was 29 and fell second month- dd3 started trying at 37 and had her just before 40.

for what its worth, what worked for me was booking an expensive holiday that would be impossible to go on if i fell pregnant (thank god for holiday insurance).

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CraftyBec · 26/02/2013 12:42

I had DD at 35 and DS at 39 (and a miscarriage in between). It took at least 6 months of TTC in all cases. The best advice I had from my GP was to cut alcohol consumption - that's for both of us. I really think that helped. And knowing when you're ovulating - but not getting too anxious about this!

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penelopepissstop · 26/02/2013 12:43

Ignore The Sun. It is not a renowned gynaecologist!

I know of a 45 year old on her 4th child and pregnancy in the 40's is not as uncommon as believed if my small cross section of society is anything to go by.

Calm down, relax and give it a bit more time. Good luck.

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TerracottaPie · 26/02/2013 12:59

I had:

DC1 at 25
DC2 at 27
DC3 at 34
DC4 will arrive in around 10 weeks when I will be 35

All of them conceived on the first try. I used ovulation kits each time as my periods were never that predictable so whether they had a big part to play or not I don't know. I fully realise I may just be very lucky though. In fact by the time ttc DC4 was decided upon I had resigned myself to the fact I couldn't be that lucky again and was dreading the repetitive testing/dtd/2ww cycle. Very, very surprised when I got that bfp.

So my experience has been that trying in my 30's was no different to trying in my 20's. But as this thread shows it is different for everybody.

Good luck OP :)

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somewherewest · 26/02/2013 13:02

My great-grandmother had my grandfather when she was 44, although he was the youngest of eight (and yes, they were Catholic Grin).

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Doilooklikeatourist · 26/02/2013 13:09

Met DH when I was 33 .
DS was born 17 months after we met . Got pregnant 2nd month of trying .
DD was easy too , off the pill on November , pregnant before Christmas .

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