DS just 18 - not had a serious girlfriend - didn't know he had one now. Just dropped him and in the car (I know, I know - he's 18 and has his own car but he's partying and he was late) he announced "I might bring a girl home tonight" I said really and where will she sleep and he said in his room. I said "I didn't know you had a girlfriend" and he said they had a bit of a thing going and I know he's had sex so what's the issue.
He took me by surprise and I said no because we don't know her, we don't know anything about her and it needs to be properly discussed with dad as well as with me. He was a bit meh said thank God he would be at uni soon but took it quite well and said thank you for the lift. I did say that if she came back with him that was fine but it was on the understanding that she slept in the guest room and he slept in his bedroom and didn't visit the guest room.
Oh bugger. What to do? He has a 14 year old sister and not sure I'm ready for this out of the blue. Fraaaaaaank are you there?
AIBU?
Teenage ds (18) "I might bring a girl home tonight"
marriedinwhite · 01/02/2013 20:28
I had that conversation with my pfb once - his first serious girlfriend was allowed to stay over, but they had been together for a year, and we knew her parents, and knew they knew where she was.
After they split up and I was almost as upset as he was because she was lovely and he was an arse sighhhh he wanted "some random girl" to stay the night and I said no, and then had to explain why which wasn't fun, but hopefully got through to him that sleeping with someone you love and respect and have a meaningful relationship with is an entirely different thing to "just a shag" with someone you hardly know 
I think it worked, as the next girl he went out with is now his fiancee, they live together, have been together almost 4 years, and are planning their wedding 
and she lived here for six months before they moved into their own wee house
Ds is nearly 21 and has been seeing his gf for nearly three years. She started off in the spare room, and is now in his room, but sadly our eyesight is such that we fail to notice. I did have to wake them up yesterday morning though - felt very odd knocking on DS's door!!!
All I can say, is thank you Mnet. He likes her but she's not a steady g/f and dd piped up "ooh a friend with benefits"!!!!!!! Evidently he doesn't want a proper g/f when he's off to uni in the autumn and he doesn't want anything heavy because of looming exams.
The girl turns out to be someone I burped at a dinner party when I was 7 months pg with him. She is the daughter of one of DH's clients, although not a couple we have kept up with socially. Her little sister is at school with dd. I have had to say very little; DH has said no way jose. No pooping on your own doorstep with the dd of one of my clients unless you bloody well care about the gir.
Sorted that one out then 
.
FastidiaBlueberry, you might be interested to hear that my Tudor Jelly was a big flop, and did not turn out as expected - though I think it might have been to King Henrys liking!
I decided to add jelly into large muffin cases, and put a marshmallow on each to add interest.
When I took them out of the cupcake tray (which I put them in for the jelly to keep it shape) they fell flat.
I had 8 pairs of posh titty with marshmallow nipple shaking on my dinner table.
Pmsl
Marriedinwhite, good luck with the conversation, I hope you get to meet her soon. (sorry for this titillating high-jack)
The only time I EVER had a bf to stay at my parents (awkward out-of-the-way place) was when I was 30, he was 34 and we lived together. We were drunk, we made the bed squeak and we got back up and got a taxi home. I still cringe about it 
My weekend mornings sound like Marrieds and Georfs. I admit I'm a scumbag too though.
My DS never surfaces till about midday. Makes tea for him and whoever crashed here and buggers off back upstairs.
God some people on this thread are posh.
Breakfast together at a specific time...
Tudor jelly...
The only thing we have regular is Grill Graham at 10.30. 
I once asked a lad I vaugely knew into my mums house for a cup of coffee. I genuinely meant a cup of coffee as he had been a sweetie and given me a lift home. (Yes, I know, I was young and stupid)
I directed him to the living room and went to make a cuppa, came back with the coffee and he was naked. In my mums living room! 
Seems he read a lot more into "would you like a cup of coffee?" Than I thought possible.
No, he did not get lucky, in fact he barely got his boxers back on before I propelled him out the front door.
I was a bit Nigella this morning. I made Tudor Jelly in individual portions in little glass jars after breakfast!
Oh god married I don't even eat breakfast. Me and dd just generally hiss at each other in the mornings and shout 'where's my bloody key' etc. I do assume that all other mothers on MN make muffins a la NIgella and I am just a scumbag, though.
So he respected your wishes then.
I will never forget being 18, and bringing a bloke home. Not because he was a boyfriend, but because he lived far away from town and lost his bus, and I lived in walking distance. He was basically just going to crash until morning. (Neither of us were drunk) I put a note up inside my parents bedroom door (so they could see it when getting up) saying:
"Mum, I have a visitor, do not check on me at 4 am as you usually do"
My naive and innocent self just did not quite realize how this would look!
Poor mum. She respected my wishes, but she had not slept much between 4 am and 9 am when I got up.
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I agree with usual like usual say something I don't agree with you on for once please
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