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AIBU?

..to be surprised at this woman's opinions on First Communion and Catholic Schools..

148 replies

fourfingerkitkat · 15/01/2013 18:25

Was chatting to another mum at our toddler group this morning about my DS and her DD who are due to start school in August. I have enrolled DS in a nearby Catholic school (dh and I are both very lapsed Catholics !) as I believe it's one of the better ones in the area and I'm hoping he'll be able to attend the Catholic secondary that I went to which is a good school. Woman I was chatting to has had a few arguments with her partner who is protestant and feels very strongly against his daughter attending a Catholic school and being "brainwashed". I told her he's entitled to his opinion but my DS and DD haven't been baptised Catholic therefore they won't be making their First Communion or Confirmation and so won't be getting "brainwashed". She seemed really shocked that I was going to deny my DD a First Communion and the chance of getting dressed up in big fat gypsy wedding style dress...I was open mouthed at that point...

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Sturnip · 28/03/2023 02:22

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This Jess person sounds lovely!

But the thread is from 2013 so the children will have left school by now.

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Doganimal · 28/03/2023 02:04

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WhatchaMaCalllit · 08/03/2013 09:42

I have read the first post (and I'll get around to reading the entire thread in a moment) but I have questions in relation to the post.

Why are you sending your child to a Catholic school if you're not going to let your child partake in the sacraments that are key to the faith? Why not send your child to a multi-denominational school or a non-denominational school instead?

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whoknowswho · 08/03/2013 08:13

Why do you want the catholic school then? for a better education I expect!!! It is a faith school and therefore you can expect that there will be an element of the faith taught within the school. First Holy Communion and Confirmation are holy sacraments within the Catholic Church - not brainwashing - you should know that as a lapsed catholic yourself. If you do not intend to take your child to church and become part of the community of the parish then I respect your view to not have your DCs go through the holy sacraments. They will however learn to respect the views and beliefs of others. I get so annoyed at all the non church goers (and there are so many) at some catholic schools, who put their children through the sacraments for no other reason than the frocks and the party afterwards. Good luck to you if you can get in the school without your children being baptised in the first place!!

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t0lk13n · 18/01/2013 09:43

It is also bullshit that faith school = good education. By having selection criteria they effectively screen out all the kids who have chaotic homelives,parents with difficulites, finaicial problems.


Sorry but in my experience of going to and teaching in Catholic schools these are exactly the children we have - frequent updates in work re pupils` homelives etc....we have more and more 'problem' children now than when I started in my school 7 yrs ago - most of them are not Catholic!

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KenDoddsDadsDog · 18/01/2013 08:04

You are very literal OP. It was a précis of the thread, not your posts.
As I said up thread , good luck with it all.

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ComposHat · 18/01/2013 01:44

*Op is in Scotland right?
The school place has been agreed already?
I only ask becasue down here in the 'home counties', the deadline for school places was yesterday, Jan 15th, and I don't hear for certain that ds2 has got a place until mid April.

Different school terms in Scotland, poor wee buggers are back at school in August, which coming from England just seems wrong somehow.

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Monty27 · 17/01/2013 23:32

*unfair

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Monty27 · 17/01/2013 23:31

OP yes, life is tough, and sometimes unfar, if you see a chance sometimes for your dc's you've just got to take it.

It's a jungle out there. I'm being genuine as well.

It is sad that it just isn't quite what you would choose. But that's the state of this country's education system I suppose.

I'm getting too deep now....

There's a thread around about the John Fisher School in Purley if you do a search you might find it interesting.

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fourfingerkitkat · 17/01/2013 23:23

KenDodd - sorry I misread your earlier post as "other half"...

At no point have I made fun of or scoffed at Catholics or Catholicism. I have scoffed at individuals who place more emphasis on the First Holy Communion festivities, dress, etc than they do on the actual sacrament itself. I have not mentioned paedophile priests or suggested that my children will be brainwashed ( I was quoting someone else).

Monthy27 - Unless the school changes its entrance criteria then I'll be taking full advantage of the fact I can send my kids to a good school. You don't think it's fair, well life isn't I suppose. Thanks for the best wishes for my kids (and that is meant genuinely)

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Monty27 · 17/01/2013 22:43

OP take your oil.

There are some devout catholics who may miss out on places, which I feel is unfair.

My opinion is if you want a non-denominal education then that's what you should go for, you can't have both, it's not right.

I wish you ds the best whatever you choose to do.

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KenDoddsDadsDog · 17/01/2013 22:28

Oh it's just the usual Catholic school thread. OP sends kids to Catholic school whilst thinking it's very funny and clever to scoff at Catholics. Some agree, some disagree. Occasional mention of brainwashing and paedophile priests....

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3monkeys3 · 17/01/2013 22:20

Hmmmmm. I haven't read the whole thread. My sil's children went to a catholic school - they were not catholic, but are now. Her eldest didn't want to be excluded from the holy communion and confirmation classes and the others followed suit.

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KenDoddsDadsDog · 17/01/2013 22:16

I didn't say your OH , I said 'oh so smart arsed'

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Joiningthegang · 17/01/2013 22:09

Mine are at the local c of e school and are most certainly "believers" - dh and i most certainly are not - you could call it brainwashing i suppose

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fourfingerkitkat · 17/01/2013 18:15

Aye ok Monty...you win..I'm a highly strung hypocrite who's partial to using the odd sweary word....I'll bow out now...

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VikingVagine · 17/01/2013 17:38

There's a difference between refusing the teachings and refusing to believe. I encourage my two to pay attention to the religious education as it will no doubt come in useful later on in their education (studying Literature without knowing the basics of the main religions is tricky to say the least).

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Monty27 · 17/01/2013 17:05

You say the catholic school will give him the best education, yet you tend to refuse parts of that education.

See, I have read them.

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fourfingerkitkat · 17/01/2013 08:19

Monty27 - I'll accept the chill pill gladly if you actually read the content of my posts. My need is for my child to have the best education possible, in this case I believe he will receive it at the nearby Catholic school.

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BegoniaBampot · 16/01/2013 23:53

No, I think the Op feels the need to send her child to a good school which is close by rather than one maybe she feels is less good and is further away. This school happens to be Catholic which takes in kids of all faiths or even no faith. Why would her child feel ostracised?

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Monty27 · 16/01/2013 23:43

No, I didn't mean swearing OP. Believe me, I'm very grown up, you condone the attitudes of the opting out of catholicism whilst feeling the need to send you dc to a catholic school. I hope your dc doesn't feel too ostracised.

I think you need a chill pill actually.

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VikingVagine · 16/01/2013 20:09

I couldn't give a monkey's left bollock about any comments I get. The kids don't feel any different from their friends, they just accept that some people genuinely believe some wierd things.

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fourfingerkitkat · 16/01/2013 18:53

And how have you found it Viking...any awkward questions from the kids about feeling different or left out ?

Maybe my opinion on this whole matter is a bit messed up as your choice of school in this part of the world (Glasgow) can be very closely linked to which football team you support (not as bad as it used to be but still the case for some sad individuals..)

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VikingVagine · 16/01/2013 18:36

DH and I are both atheists. Both are kids go to a private Catholic school. We'd burn in hell if we believed in it Grin

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BegoniaBampot · 16/01/2013 16:56

why is it hypocritical? the op wants her child to go to good school nearby, she is breaking no rules. nowhere has she said she has a problem with it being catholic. maybe she should send her child to a school further away with not so good a rep, that makes perfect sense.

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