to want to gouge my eyeballs out/pull my ears off when I see/hear this statement?

[beetrootface]

Increasingly, both in RL and on the internet, I have seen the statement 'mum always knows best' when it comes to parenting. Does anyone here really believe in this statement? Does mum always know whats best for her child?

AIBU to be really angered when someone is basically justifying potentially dangerous/harmful parenting methods by using this sort of clap trap?

I feel really angry tonight after reading on another forum about a woman who has a very very young baby (11 weeks) who is waking constantly through the night crying and she won't feed him, she just sticks a dummy in his mouth but he spits it out and starts crying again. The majority of posters are telling her just to give him a feed so they can both get some sleep, but these posters are being slated and she is gripping on to the posters who are telling her she obviously knows best because she gave birth to him.

[blondiedollface]

I think in the sentiment of you're the one with them all the time - for example when at my mum's and I hear the hungry cry I know best that she needs feeding, or when it's her tired cry she needs to go down for a nap whereas some people even other family members would just go 'oh she's crying, does she need feeding? has she pooped?' in those cases MUM KNOWS BEST what to do with the baby at the current time. Applying it to a medical situation, not so much!

[Booboobedoo]

What you describe in the OP is daft obviously, but I don't think the 'Happy Mum, happy baby' thing should be entirely dismissed out of hand.

I was brought up to think that all personal happiness should be eschewed for the sake of one's offsping , and actually I've had crippling PND with both of my kids, and really should have been taking more notice of my own emotional health than I actually did.

Just saying it's about balance.

[blackeyedsusan]

if they throw up on the way to school/do actually have a broken wrist, it is time to do the talk about calling wolf... [evil mummy emotion]


oh and yanbu

[CrapBag]

It completely depends on the situation. The situation in your OP, no, the mum is being lazy. In my house, mum does know best because I am a SAHM and DH works. I know the kids routine and what they like and want a bit better, DHh does tend to defer things and go with my lead in parenting. My own 'mother', no. Abusive and she disowned me at 4 years old.

Just ignore crap like this.

[BloodRedAlienReflux]

That's the worrying thing about these forums, some loons take one post as bloody gospel! give your baby whisky ffs, who would do that? but some numb skull would do it! 'well I saw it on Bounty so.....'

[MurderOfGoths]

beetroot My mum did the same when I broke my wrist, she lectured me all the way to the hospital about how I "better not be putting it on"

bringupthebabies I think it is meant to be used that way, but unfortunately gets misused a lot

[beetrootface]

Whoever coined the phrase 'happy mummy happy baby' is a clown.

I would be a very happy mummy if I were to spend all day today lying in my bed glugging down bottles of red wine, eating chocolates and ignoring everyone for a while. I don't think my baby twins would be very happy

[mutny]

I remember a woman on bounty telling a rather emotional young mum to wean at 8 weeks to get the baby to sleep. Same poster also said their hv had advocated giving newborns whisky (this advice was given within the last year) and that the OP should do as she wants as 'mummy knows bets'.
Tbh that poster went on to tell people that only children who were vaccinated could attend school.

[beetrootface]

I think what you're describing there is instinct Byeecklove rather than the happy mummy happy baby nonsense.

I don't know why I went back to see more responses on the womans thread, I want to gouge my eyes out even more this morning.

[Byecklove]

My mum didn't believe that I'd broken my foot - she did when the teachers called her and told her to come and get me! I don't hold it against her, honest.

I agree, 'tis never an excuse for bad parenting but I think there is a grain of truth to it. NOBODY believed me when I said there was something wrong with DS2. I knew something wasnt right so persevered and eventually (far too late, poor thing had been in pain for months) a lovely Dr ran some tests (foreign country) and he was diagnosed with severe silent reflux. So I think healthcare professionals, teachers etc should listen if a parent tells them something's up but perhaps not take it as gospel.

[RikersBeard]

YANBU

About as logical as happy mommy = happy baby

Used to justify whatever course of action "mommy" would like to pursue, whether it's in the baby's best interests or not

[PoppadomPreach]

Goes hand in hand with "happy mummy, happy baby". Both utter shite.

[sashh]

mum always knows best

Tell that to Baby P

[redexpat]

YANBU! If that were true then supernanny wouldn't be on our tv screens. And my schoolteacher friends will tell you that some parents do not know their little darlings are actually little devils!

[humblebumble]

YANBU

[PandaSpaniel]

Think I should go to bed...

[PandaSpaniel]

Not laughing at the children being ill, just that they are milking it, just to be clear.

[PandaSpaniel]

Lol at the above. Serves ya right you unfit mothers! [hgrin]

[beetrootface]

Oh shes fine now, she milked it for all its worth! Although she does throw it back in my face now and again "you didn't believe me, call yourself a mother!"

[bringupthebabies]

Yes thanks, it was a few years ago now. He really enjoys reminding me 'of that time you said there was nothing wrong with me and made me eat my tea when I was ill and had to go to hospital. Can I have some...?'

Hope your DDs wrist is healing well.

[PandaSpaniel]

bringupthebabies, yes us mums (and dads) do spend the most time with our children but obviously we don't always know best and are not afraid to admit it ^^ I always send my lil un to school despite him saying he is ill (he is ALWAYS ill on a Monday lol) but had to admit defeat when he threw up on the way to school once.

[beetrootface]

Oh Bringup, is he ok now?

[bringupthebabies]

Beetroot I did something similar - turned out mine had pneumonia not was whinging because he hadn't like the tea I's cooked!