People teaching DS to say "ta" not "thank you"

[auburnlizzy78]

He's 11 months. Just not sure whether I'm BU to be irritated. I say it sometimes obviously in conversation so I'm not a Brian Sewell-type stickler for perfection when it comes to spoken English.... but should we not be teaching correct words first as he will pick up enough slang on his own anyway?

One of the grandparents is always doing this - asking DS to pass her a book or a toy and repeatedly saying "ta, ta" at him. I tried the subtle approach of joining in and saying "thank you DS" but she didn't click and kept on with the "ta, ta, ta." Not sure if I should correct gently or let it go?

[voddiekeepsmesane]

OMG really!!?? A young child does not have the the ability to say thank you but it is good social education to start early that acknowledgement of taking/receiving something. "Ta" is only used for a short time if so desired and within a year your child will have the ability to say thank you even if it is in a toddler fashion eg "fank ouu" or similar.

Unclench people :)

[auburnlizzy78]

My friend's baby just turned one and I have heard her say "fankoo". So I didn't think it was too early to pick up the proper term.

Do nurseries really teach "ta"? Surprised by that. Do they also teach "yeah" instead of "yes" and, for South Londoners (like me), "innit" as a baby-friendly easy-to-say abbreviated form of - "is that not the case?"

Overthinking, maybe...

[naturalbaby]

my kids said 'fanks' and 'please' as soon as they could talk. despite various people trying to get them to say ta. just shrug it off, your kid will be more likely to copy you if you spend most of the day with them. till they get to school and start speaking in txt speak.

[SardineQueen]

I wouldn't correct a relative or other person who was trying to teach ta.

But I would always say thank you.

I think probably what the parents say will win the day!

I also don't see the point of teaching something different when they are little We say thank-you, the children started off with an-oo and took it from there. I don't think their development was hindered in any way! In fact DD2 said "an-oo" to me spontaneously only this morning [proud smile]

[auburnlizzy78]

Ah, well I'm back to work tomorrow so primary responsibility for vocab will be handed over to my DH who is going to be a SAHD. THe last thing DH taught DS successfully was to pat his podgy belly while he says "flubber, flubber, flubber!" so maybe I am fighting (or not) a losing battle...!

[talkingnonsense]

Saying ta for thank you and choochoo for train, etc, is called motherese and is generally considered to be an important part of speech development, used in almost all languages. Go with it.

[SardineQueen]

I don't say ta or choochoo.

i do say doggie and horsery though.

Surely each parent's "motherese" will be different, and will be what she instinctively does with her own children. It's not like it's a formal language "though shalt say ta when your children are small" or whatever it might be.

[SardineQueen]

Or horsey even.

Horsery would be odd

[Grumpla]

My DS started off with 'ta' although tbh I wasn't toooo fussed about it as he only had about ten words until fairly recently, so I thought it was probably more important to focus on expanding his vocab so he could have a go at communicating what he wanted rather than focus on 'manners'.

Now he is talking in two / three / four word sentences I am pretty hot on 'teese' and 'fankoo' and he is picking up no problem, 'ta' has pretty much vanished.

[mistressploppy]

YANBU - I reeally hate this too. Perhaps it's irrational, but there you are. For some reason 'choochoo train' doesn't bother me at all - but it HAS to have the 'train' bit on the end.

I don't count 'ta' as motherese, because I don't say it . And I'm a speech therapist.

DS is nearly 2yo. He started with 'ah-ooo' at about 12mo, moved to 'ank-oo' and is now on 'fank-oo'.

[auburnlizzy78]

Amused by SardineQueen

My own brand of "motherese" (there's actually a wikipedia entry for it!) is to use correct English as far as reasonable but higher, softer, more sing-song like and using lots of repetition. Probably the sort of woman you would want to stab if you heard me in Sainsbury's, but I do try to keep a lid on it when out.

OK, so I won't say anything, ta for your help and comments everyone

[magicOC]

I'm with you on that one. I hate to hear a small child say TA.

Don't have children of my own, but, as a nanny i'm always teaching them to say "thank you". I agree that for very small children "ta" is easier, and they will often say "ta" so rather that make them feel they have said it wrong I will repeat to them "ta, thank you". They pick it up soon enough.

Often it will come out as either "tatoo" or even "ackoo"

[working9while5]

Mistressploppy, you are a speech therapist? This bothers you? I'm surprised! I thought we were all just relieved if we were lucky enough to have kids that can speak!

[exoticfruits]

I don't like it or use it, but it really doesn't matter. Just keep saying thankyou yourself. Parents can't control everyone who comes into contact with their DC.(However much they might like to!)

[catgirl1976]

YANBU - -I hate "ta" and "choo choo" "doggy" "horsey" etc

I would have a real issue with a nursery teaching words like that! I know its personal preference, but that's mine.

[MysteriousHamster]

Went to see my parents couple of weeks ago and noticed everyone was saying ta to my DS. They're oop north and though I used to say it a lot too had sort of forgotten about it. Have a feeling I've been saying it all over the place accidentally since we came back home though. They also managed to teach my son hiya in a matter of days when we've been busy failing with hello for ages.

In fact OP, I have a feeling I might've said 'ta' to you recently... (don't think I have told you this name change though it is similar to one I've had before). Just give me a sharp nudge with an elbow if you ever hear me do it :)

[SurprisEs]

YANBU I hate "ta" and all those silly abbreviations. People naturally create their own way of speaking as they grow so I find it very important to teach children the correct way of saying things from day one.

[mistressploppy]

Heh heh - you've got a point, Working9while5! Btw, are you in North Yorkshire??

[40notTrendy]

YABU. It's the seed of thank you. DS used ta, yes, grandparents encouraged it but he's now a chatterbox very eloquent 5 yr old who uses please and thank you

[stealthsquiggle]

both my DC went through very brief phases (quite possibly aided/abetted by nursery and GPs) of saying "ta" before moving on to "ankooo"

"P P P" for please lasted a bit longer. I don't personally think it is worth stressing about although no doubt I did when my PFB was at that stage (I have conveniently blocked all such memories)

[Kladdkaka]

YABU it's a perfectly good word and a throw back to our viking ancestors. Put thanks into google translate, translate it to icelandic and then listen to how it's pronounced. Sweden, Norway and Denmark use the same word but pronounce it slightly differently.

[usualsuspect]

I think ta is ok ,I still say ta

[Cereal]

"Ta" isn't motherese. It's quite a usual word for thank you in some parts of the country, among all ages. It's informal and friendly :)

[Madamolive]

My MIL likes repetitively repeating "Bo-Bo time" when refering to bedtime. I like following loudly with "its bedtime (dc name)". Bo-Bo, what even is it?

[DaydreamDolly]

YABU

I hate the 'ta' snobs. I taught DD 'ta' before she was old enough to get her chops round 'thank you' , as I wanted her to learn that there is a response when someone gives you something.
Once she was able to better form words, ta became thank you very easily, and she certainly speaks 'good english'