To think this type of helicoptering is OTT at kids parties?

[minxofmancunia]

I'm prepared to be flamed about this, I know a lot of parents like to hyper supervise every single calorie and morsel that passes their childs lips otherwise....oh i don't know hell might freeze over or something but surely you can back off at a party??

One of the reasons I send dh with dd to parties rather than go myself is because I find the anxious, hectic, hyper controlling helicoptering of other parents too much to bear esp at the mealtime. So what of they just eat a handful of doritos 3 breadsticks and a piece of cake? It's ONE MEAL. It's a PARTY.



Dh went to a party at a play centre recently, one that's renowed for having healthy good food, carrot sticks proper baker chips, pitta bread, hummus etc. It was for a 5 year old. every parent bar him stood "OVER" their child monitoring and co-ercing every, single, mouthful and flapping if they didn't take adequate intake of grapes/veg etc. Above anything else i actually think it's embarrassing. get a grip people.

At my dds 5th party I'll be asking that they're left. No staying and special GENUINE dietry requirements aside I ain't monitoring them all at food time.

AIBU, I'm I a terrible mummy, benign neglectful harridan?

Oh and BTW I work in child health and am fully aware of opinions amongst my colleagues and myself who think that this kind of parenting can actually contribute to food issues in adolescence which i believe to be true.

[boredofusername]

Despite living in an aspirational, Stepford wives-type locale with perfect kids begotten of perfect parents, I have never experienced this. Kids at birthday parties are allowed to eat rubbish. As long as they eat the odd carrot stick or two

And it's not a zombie thread anymore as there are at least 15 posts above mine from today.

[FreshHorizons]

Nearly got caught.

ZOMBIE thread for those who don't notice.

[KierkegaardGroupie]

Minx.


Wow
You say...
No identity....no life...being competitive through their kids???


So so so assumptive. So so so ignorant. So so so domineering.

Stay baffled.
Or try and understand.

So you can be less irritating to people who really don't ask for your opinion on their parental choices.

I judge people like you even though I try not to...I think...ahhh they must have no identity outside taking an interest in what other parents do, or they were not shown empathy when they were kids or they are just not very bright and don't understand that there are often a whole plethora of reasons why different parents do different things to you with kids different from yours.

I hope my example will shed some light on why people don't do exactly what you think they should do with their children.

Go now and take a good look at yourself.

[BlackeyedShepherdsbringsheep]

[jadorecakesnbiscuits]

I'm used to be a bit of a helicopter parent with my toddler in the soft play at parties, imagine a 9 months pregnant woman blubbering into a ball pit to rescue her perfectly fine son who had a tiny tumble. I try my best but sometimes I get a bit over protective and silly, as for the food though he can eat what he wants at parties I just keep a distant eye on him to make sure he's not eating everyone else's

[KierkegaardGroupie]

I always helicopter my son.
The one time i didn't he ended up in hospital with a 2000 k bill.
He has good allergies and if he eats dairy his airway us going to close fast and he will die if we don't get adrenalin into him.

Is it ok with you if I keep on helicopters?

Do you know what I hate at parties ...people who so can't mind their own business or are so hyper sensitive to others' choices that they are so irked they have to send their husband or start a thread. Yabu

You are being reasonable sending hubby because I can't stand people like you watching me and judging my actions. You have no idea what people have hoping on. Their kid could have food sensitivity, dye intolerance, allergies.

Grow some tolerance op.

[CaptainCrunch]

They know it's a zombie thread, they've done about 6. Just report.

[BabyGanoush]

nooby, the kids are now 10

[witsender]

This thread is 5 yrs old.

[Obs2016]

Most parents don't even leave kids at a 7th birthday party, these days. Lord knows why. I hate it, this style of parenting.

[Gobbolino6]

I've never witnessed this. I must be lucky. I live in an affluent area and expected this sort of behaviour to be rife, but everyone just lets the children get on with it.

[MLGs]

Oooh my bad, ZOMBIE

[MLGs]

I certainly got a few funny looks when I let DS (2) just eat the pom bears at a b day party recently. My thought was that I could feed him properly when we got home.

It's a though people as seeing this as an opportunity for a free meal, and to save feeding their kids that day, rather than just a bit of fun.

[OhYouLuckyDuck]

YANBU, it's a party and they can eat whatever they like (food allergies permitting of course, being observant about what they eat is totally understandable then).

One year we did a party for DD and one parent contacted me to say that her daughter was not allowed any cakes or biscuits, another said no meat, another said no nuts. We catered for the 'no nuts' request because of allergy but the others had to put up with it; I was doing a mix of vegetarian and meat sandwiches anyway.

[ghostyslovesheep]

and you like to bump threads that are 5 years old as well???????

Z-O-M-B-I-E THREAD

[Noobylola]

Yeah I'm from South England too. Does seem loads of parents don't give a monkeys. Choc for breakfast, pasty for lunch, mc Donald's for dinner. Poor kids I feel sorry for them.

[Noobylola]

My sisters and I do this with a nephew of mine (younger sisters) a little bit because he will literally eat and eat until he makes himself sick. We left him twice at parties, obviously warned the parents he'll over eat if you let him, they reassured us they'd watch he didn't and it was absolutely fine for us to go, they'd make sure he didn't eat three slices of cake etc. We discovered they obviously weren't that observant when he puked up in the back of the car on the way home. So yeah now we hover lol

[Astrophe]

..woops..I wouldn't mind your mess! I have 3 untidy DC and am far too pregnant to do anything about it!

[Astrophe]

:) alemci

[alemci]

Its a shame you aren't here Astrophe. I am quite chatty and enjoy meeting new people. I hear what you are saying though. However if you saw my house at this point in time I don't think you would want to hang out here. Messy teenagers who leave stuff lying around everywhere.

[exoticfruits]

It may not be our business- but we all judge-everyone does.

[VanillaRooibos]

OP YABU - none of your business how other people parent! Well done you for being so laissez-faire

[ilovedora27]

I live down south in england and parties I know of are like astrophes. I have never been to a kids party in the home unless they are bbq/drinking type of events. I couldnt care less what food my DD eats and have never met anyone that does, if anything its way more the other way here (think kids eating sausage rolls for breakfast!)

[ArmchairFeminist]

I dump n run.

Parties are times when normal food rules do not apply and they can eat what they want.

And when I am host I can't stand parents I don't know hanging around my kitchen . I don't bite, you can leave.