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AIBU?

To think you shouldn't correct an accent?

139 replies

Catsu · 14/06/2011 21:20

Am disagreeing with dh over this.
We moved just before ds2 was born. Where we now live there is a regional accent different to how dh and I speak.
Ds2 is 3.5 yrs and is starting to pronounce words the local way. Dh keeps correcting him. I keep telling dh not to correct him.
Ds2 was born here, will grow up here and why wouldn't he speak with the local accent??

What do you think? Aibu or is dh?

OP posts:
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minouminou · 15/06/2011 17:06

DS corrects me..."No, it's carstle", mama". I just tell him that people from different parts of the world say things differently and leave it at that.
I will, along with another poster, stamp out "haitch" if it ever rears its ugly, aspirated head in this household.

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Omigawd · 15/06/2011 15:26

If its a regional accent that labels them in others' minds as dumb oiks, then dh is right. Re left handedness, that sounds a bit Victorian Dad!

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ensure · 15/06/2011 15:21

showofhands so interested to read your post. I did wonder the other day why my DD had a west country accent, saying "sloide" for slide etc!

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constantlywrong · 15/06/2011 15:10

I'm with your DH.

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fedupofnamechanging · 15/06/2011 14:11

I think it's fine to correct grammar, but you are swimming against the tide if you try to get rid of a regional accent. Tbh, if you strongly dislike a particular accent, then it's best not to bring children up there because they will pick it up.

Wrt the left handed thing, I am left handed and my parents thought it would benefit me if I could do things the way a right handed person would, because the world is set up for the majority. So although I hold a pen in my left hand, I hold cutlery the same way as a right handed person. This has been helpful in restaurants. I've never bought anything that's designed for left handed people in particular and I've been okay. Think it would be wrong to make a child write with their right hand though.

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Oblomov · 15/06/2011 13:48

I hope I wasn't being included in 'the 2 people who think accents are bad' category.
Both my parents have scottish accents from near dumfries.
I come from Devon and have no accent. But I sure can put on on 'alreet me lurver', Devonian accent, if so required.
And I actually quite like accents.
But admit that there are a few that I am not quite so keen on. Don't think I'm unusual there.

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Cookie79 · 15/06/2011 09:41

Show of Hands - that's really good to know it's normal - we are from Lancashire and my DD has just started saying words with a bit of a west country accent.

I try and speak nicely but it's a hangover from school where the horrible bullies had broad Rochdale accents and I vowed never to be like them in any way.

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ScarletOHaHa · 15/06/2011 09:32

Not sure what the difference between endearing twang and mispronunciation is. I correct grammar but couldn't care less how word are pronounced. I am glad newscasters/ presenters etc have regional accents . If reflects the country we live in. Love Brummie and Black Country accents (and Liverpudlian of course).

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chelstonmum · 15/06/2011 08:18

I think there is a difference between colloquial language and an accent. DH and I are Scottish, as are DC's but they now live in England and have a very polite 'scottish' accent. They were never allowed to use scottish colloquialisms before they moved (DH does and it drives me mad) and most certainly couldn't now as they would not be understoond!

DD sings hymns in an english accent as this is how her school teacher does it.....rather cute!

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nooka · 15/06/2011 08:07

I grew up in South London, and speak RP (aka posh) very similarly to my parents. My children also grew up in South London and spoke Sarf London. I'm not sure why really, I certainly tried to fit in at school, but didn't do very well at it. Now we live in Canada and dd sounds like a local, ds is starting to go that way, and I don't think dh and I have changed very much yet, although I am picking up the different inflections now.

I like accents. I think they are very interesting. I did correct ds with his 'ain'ts' and 'bu-a' because they drove me round the bend, but he gave as good as he got, so I don't think it did him any harm Grin. The only accent I find really hard to understand is Black Country. We had a friend from Wolverhampton at university and it took a few days adjustment to understand a word he was saying. Here in Canada I often have to speak very slowly to be understood, although often people don't actually tell me they don't know what I am saying, so I've got good at picking up the blank expressions!

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jeckadeck · 15/06/2011 07:52

It depends on what you're doing when you say "correcting." If you're actually trying to stamp the accent out then its a) snobbish and will create social problems for your kids because the other kids will mark them out as being a little bit different because of the way they speak and b) is likely to be totally counterproductive because the regional influence is very strong and they won't be able to overcome it. If you're just trying to correct those regionalisms which actually render the language incorrect then I don't see any harm in that. I just think be quite judicious about it and don't, wittingly or unwittingly, give your kids the sensation that they are different from other kids from round there and need to speak in a more refined way. That way a whole heap of trouble lies.

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bigTillyMint · 15/06/2011 07:38

bigfatcath, how do you say lolly ice then? I mean, what should it be? Ice lolly?
And trousers are kecks, innit?

My mum was a teacher and I remember a fantastic illustrated alphabet that one of the kids did (aged about 7, not trying to be clever or anything), where most of the words were scouse slang.

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emptyshell · 15/06/2011 07:22

I had a very very strong north east accent as a kid (despite my mother trying to tone down the worst of it). First day at a posh uni I got there and no one could understand what the hell I was saying - I HAD to tone it down. I've still got a distinctly north-east tone to it, but it's enough to get by and it's gradually getting mixed in with Nottingham.

Accents and valuing your roots is fine - but when they're hitting the point of utter incomprehensibility - then they need to be knocked back a touch.

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jaggythistle · 15/06/2011 07:20

yeah - how do you pronounce worried then if it's not 'wurried'? Confused

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bigfatcath · 15/06/2011 07:06

Sheffield accent is the best... fantastic city too.

Scouse makes my skin crawl (lolly ice, pants for trousers} etc etc.

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Megatron · 15/06/2011 06:54

Your DH IBU. I have a Scottish accent and my children both have Bedfordshire accents because they have been born and brought up here. I correct them when they drop their t's but I would do that whatever their accent. I love accents though!

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sparkle12mar08 · 15/06/2011 06:51

Ooh, ooh, someone mentioned Stoke! - Cans't thee kick a bow aginst a wo an bost it?! Conna, wonna, onna! The first is accent, the second dialect I suppose. I love my heritage and am desperately trying to source a book on the Potteries dialect, but I am rather glad I've dropped my accent, for the most part. I modified it conciously when I went to university, I sounded so out of place compared to all my peers, I had no idea how strong and different my accent was. I don't sound truly southern, and never will, but I'm happy not to be a broad Stokie tbh.

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Decorhate · 15/06/2011 06:47

I am puzzled about the reference to "worried" pronounced "wurried" at the start if the thread - how else are you "supposed" to say it?? [forriner emoticon]

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bigTillyMint · 15/06/2011 06:38

I am horrified that your DH wanted to make your DS right-handed - is he from the Dark Ages?

I love regional accents, so it wouldn't bother me at all, but in any case....

your DS may experiment with it for fitting in with peers / locals (children are very good at copying the behaviour etc of others to fit in), but will also be taking in the pronounciation he hears at home. As he gets older, he will learn when and where to use both. DS did this and can switch as appropriate.

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onceamai · 15/06/2011 06:32

We live in South London. The DC don't speak Sarf London and we've never particularly thought about it. Neither do they have a Yorkshire accent in spite of the DH having one. The speak normal, well spoken, non regionalised, grammatically correct English.

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CurrySpice · 15/06/2011 00:40

Seeker, only 2 people have said accents are "bad". Everyone else has been rejoicing in the diversity of accents and think the OP's DP is wasting his time. Where are all these snobs?

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kitkatya · 15/06/2011 00:20

And, proper fish and chips!! Smile

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MavisEnderby · 15/06/2011 00:11

Enjoy xxBeach and icecream plus kids,happy day!

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kitkatya · 15/06/2011 00:08

I love Cott Road!! my mum wants me to buy a house there. One thing I love about Hull is how easy it is to get to the seaside. I cant wait to go home in August and go to Brid!

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MavisEnderby · 15/06/2011 00:04

LOL XX.mY Db (much younger and much more go-getting than I )is also London based but also a Hull graduate,despite not being from here like myself,he also has fond memoriesxxxxAvenues are fab.I would love an Avenues house but am stranded somewhat close to the University x

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