to think that disability hate words are as bad as racial hate ones?

[Peachy]

This is of course related to this thread but also have been in school this morning with ds1 who has been called a retard and his brother (they both have ASD) a spaz.

I would never choose to use a word that offends a group or makes them out to be lesser humans (think racial hate, homophobic words etc)- it woudl be beneath me. So why is it still considered OK for people to use terms like this for disabled people? frequently the excuse is theya re emdical terms but I am in a field that uses medical terminology for disabled people and we constantly review our language usage and minimise use of terms now regarded inappropriate.

Surely a word that offends a group of people who made noa ctive choice about their characteristic is wrong regardless of excuse?

Am fuming for ds1 but at least he is able to fight back and school took seriously. DS3 is not able to fight for himself and should not have to live with bigotry. DS1 is actively campaigning for a racial awareness campaign at school (he is Chair of School Council) after talking with some friends about the racial abuse they have encountered: am thining it needs to be about all hate langauge not one distinct group.

[Shoesytwoesy]

good luck with the reporting, you will get the standard reply, and the be told if it upsets you hide it.....

[Glitterknickaz]

You can't educate shit though, can you

[wigglybeezer]

YANBU.

Ds1 was being baited with all sorts of insults on the school bus by a nasty boy who was determined to wind him up, DS1 cracked and punched the boy when he called DS2 a "mong". Nasty boy then laid into DS1. Luckily DS1's friends stuck up for him and it was the nasty boy who got into trouble. I couldn't bring myself to punish DS1 for throwing the first punch, I was actually glad he stuck up for DS2.

[nijinsky]

Totally agree with the premise in the OP. Theres a fine line between banter with the intention of making people feel included and offensiveness. But if such talk became less widely accepted then the banter wouldn't be needed, would it?

OTOH race and hate crime get so much publicity but as a very ordinary women, the amount of offensive, derogatory remarks I have to put up with in an ordinary week is ridiculous, but its just considered par for the course.

[maighdlin]

YANBU My DD has congenital hypothyroidism previously known as cretinism. Its all very under control but my blood boils when people use "cretin" as a derogatory term. I have to admit using it before DD but since i have found out the origins I am furious when people say it and am ashamed of myself for using it. "cretin" is a word most people are very ignorant about. People i know would never say "retard" or "spaz" but will use cretin not knowing about it. They use it in a derogatory way for someone who is stupid or odd and I have and will say "please do not use that word I find it offensive", explain what it actually means and that DD has that condition.

[GrimmaTheNome]

maig, my DHs uncle also has congenital hypothyroidism and 'cretin' is one of the few words DH will absolutely not tolerate. It is used in ignorance, partly because the condition is fortunately not so obviously around, now that its usually detected and treated (DHs uncle v lucky to have lived near Gt Ormond street where they were able to detect and treat 80 years ago)

[EllenJaneisnotmyname]

I think people using terms in ignorance is understandable, but once they have them explained they should stop using them. It's when people know bloody well that a term is incredibly offensive but carry on regardless, that is more disturbing.

[Lovecat]

YANBU.

I reported a revolting disablist post yesterday for the first time - having read the thread linked to in the OP, I was deeply ashamed that I haven't thought to do it before now - I've generally gone "tch! fuckwits!" to my screen and moved on - but I think we have to stand up and be counted given the wave of fuckwittery currently sweeping over MN.

[Andrewofgg]

YANBU but you are being unrealistic. Children are children and they are not always nice to each other.

[EvenLessNarkyPuffin]

YANBU

[Brownsugarshortbread]

YANBU!

Children will be children.. Yes.. But parents and other adults need to tell them it's not on!

[troisgarcons]

'mong' doesnt always mean what we think it means ..... it's an acceptable word in Ozzie lingo (oh am I being Australianist?) and a derivative of 'mongrel'. It's all over the Australian soaps.

Teenagers especially have a way of adapting words for their own use. Just think of the word 'gay', actually thinking of the word 'gay' it meant happy when I was growing up ...... so that word has been coined and used by a completely group!

There are a lot of words I don't particularly like - "N" being one of them, however it is perfectly acceptable for black teenage boys to use it towards each other because they have reclaimed the word. Why they would want to is beyond me, given what it's original connotations were.

The other word that is winding me up, in teen speak, lately is 'jew'.

TBH if you spoke language in a PC way, in the way we would write, it would take half an hour to get a sentence out!

[Brownsugarshortbread]

Well done, the international it's okay arguement and a new arguement of it's okay because otherwise it would take to long to type.

That just made my night !

[onagar]

Pumpernickel10 made my point when she claimed that she was offended by "a charity shop called the spastics society" when she was young.

She said "it's all down I think to how you have been brought up, I was brought up to treat others who I wish to be treated I try and treat everyone with respect*

But obviously the spastics society was not named to insult people and was there to help disabled people. The word had a perfectly respectable use back then and Pumpernickel10 is trying to backdate how she feels about the word now and apply it to a time when it wasn't an insult.

You can't have any rules for what people say while you have others who will misapply them like that.

[troisgarcons]

Brownsugarshortbread Thu 09-Jun-11 20:10:25
Well done, the international it's okay arguement and a new arguement of it's okay because otherwise it would take to long to type.


If I said to a friend I was feeling a bit 'tearful' today - would you really expect me to launch into an expanded form of speech and announce I was having mental health issues connected with menstrual hormonal upsets? Sorry, but! That just isn't going to happen is it?

[Pumpernickel10]

Your right ona it probably wasn't offensive then but I think when I was a teenager the word spas was used in an offensive manner so that's why I commented I guess. Such a long time ago now

[EllenJaneisnotmyname]

But, ongar, if people use the word 'spastic', or 'retard' or 'mong' today there is pretty much no doubt that whatever the intention or the ignorance, it is offensive. It shouldn't be tolerated on a public forum populated by a large group of parents with SN themselves or children with SN.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I agree with Cogito; I'm saddened at the use of horrible words against anybody. Of course it isn't alright to use offensive names but it's not ok to use them anywhere to anybody. Everyone has different parameters of what is ok and it does get confusing when some offensive words seem to be acceptable - they aren't.

[Brownsugarshortbread]

Troisgarcon... Urrmm no.. But we aren't talking words such as 'tearful' .

But you still made my night :)

[troisgarcons]

The fact that 'spaz' was hijacked into everyday speech as a derogatory insult is exactly why the charity changed its name to SCOPE

O/T (or still On topic) - 'spaz' is making a ressurgence in teen-lingo - tho I sincerely doubt they know what it means. 'tard' is very common also

[Pumpernickel10]

I agree sgm if we don't report such posts then folks like that will continue spewing their venom and hate. Why should we have to hide thread after thread? Threads like that should not be posting in the first place they are usually posted to stir up trouble