Adoption and/or FASD and sugar addiction

[scarfonthestairs]

Ds (11) has been at home for 9 years. He has an absolute addiction to sugar and an unhealthy obsession with food.
I'm trying to find some information or help or anything on these situations.
If I'm honest were in the conplete depths of control and shitness at the moment but this is something I want to understand more about

Does he have a diagnosis of FASD? My two are the same but no diagnosis.

Yep we've got a diagnosis although he's "perfect " in school 🙄 he is another story at home!

Are you getting any input from post-adoption support?

One of my children, although she doesn't have FASD (and from info of birth mum and how DD presents its not at all suspected) however she does have an acquired brain injury, and she has huge issues around food that really dominate our lives, she contantly seeks out food, it casues her huge anxiety and is unsafe due to her going to any means to get food and then eating huge amounts of it. From speaking to our link worker from the Child Brain Injury Trust she said that some of their families have children whose brain injury has affected their hunger and behaviour around food, she described it as like 'acquired prada willi syndrome'. However this information is anecdotal and I've not been able to get more information apart from the occasional couple of lines of info. It does make me think about parts of our children's brains, how they've been affected by the damage (whether due to FASD, brain or injury or in other ways) and there is clearly more research needed. However I also recognise that trauma plays a large part in her history and this is likely contributing.

I absolutely understand the daily grind of managing food and its impact on the child and the whole family. Its really difficult

I had support for a long time through ASF with a therapeutic social worker to talk through these issues and strategies to manage, she also had tests through the hospital to rule out anything else that could've been contributing to the issues. Being consistent helps, it's brings her anxiety slightly less, but also makes it alot easier for me not having to think about food as much, we have very set times and amounts of food and I've learnt to not budge on these. She enjoys large portions of healthy food and predictable 'treats' that are not at all rewards for good behaviour.

I believe there’s a connection between cortisol and sugar craving. When DC are dysregulated and stress hormones are zooming up, they definitely seek sugar. There’s also something around food anxiety from not always being fed when hungry when DC were tiny, which is agonising to think about, but quite hard to deal with on a day to day basis. It can feel like such a lack of trust that we won’t feed them, but it comes from not having that primal need met. Hurtful and exhausting, but absolutely not a reflection on us personally - as a very wise person on here told me “they’re not doing it TO you, they’re doing it IN FRONT of you…to show you they’re struggling”.

Given the diagnosis, some of the “standard” advice like putting the daily snacks in a box together and giving them choice when to eat it, may not be plausible. Visual timetables, pinned up meal plans, and pretty immovable meal times can help some DC a bit, as can upping the protein in the snacks.

Great advice from PP about getting a check for anything medical that might be contributing.

Could he have ADHD?